My dd needs glasses

[Hellomummy23]

I did a post on here but received negative comments and didn't know how to edit it so I'll rephrase it

My little girl age 7 went for a routine eye test as I took my children all together for their first test. She's never had any problems with her eyes she reads great and has never complained.

I was shocked for them to tell me she's a +2.00 in both eyes. She didn't want to wear glasses and immediately got upset which upset me as I don't like seeing my kids heartbroken yes I know it's only glasses and there are worse things going on in the world but this is just her feelings and obvs in a ideal world I would rather this may be happening.

I just wanted advice for any other children who have kids with the same strength how often they wear their glasses.
I didn't even know if this was strong or a weak strength as I was quite shocked too and didn't ask any questions.

I've told my daughter that she has nothing to worry about and reassured her so I don't need any comments telling me that I should not give her negative energy as I haven't. I always get upset if my kids are upset they are my world

My DD2 has worn glasses since age 3 after her first eye test. She also had patching for a few weeks.

She wears them when she is awake and takes them off after tooth brushing.

She's hoping to move to contact lenses when she is a teenager.

I can sense your distress but it seems rather out of proportion to the issue. Your world should be bigger than just being a mum. You have value as you not just because you have children.

There was an answer on your original thread from an optometrist saying it is mild. If that was not enough to put your mind at rest call your DD's optician.

Your original thread and to some extent this one comes across as "wearing glasses is terrible". For all of us who don't have perfect vision it is grating to be exposed to that attitude...we get a lot of crap day to day about being species four eyes.

I wore glasses from the age of 13 months, so I have no memory of not having them. The biggest problem I had with them was when I was about five and other kids would want to try them on which I was unhappy about because they risked getting dirty, broken or lost. But the other children soon lost interest.

For the sake of your daughter’s education it would make more sense to have her vision corrected.

Do you know what she objects to about glasses? For example if the glasses cause her discomfort, get the fit checked or consider a different style of frame; if she feels the glasses are not cool point her to some role model glasses-wearers (Harry Potter, cartoon characters, pop stars) or family friends who could talk to her about how important and cool glasses are.

My daughter was very upset and it upset me.

I get that it's a surprise but it's brilliant that she's had her eyes tested and you know what's what. My parents never took me to the optician and it wasn't until they came into school when I was 12 that I had my eyes tested and found out I was short-sighted!

Obviously she'll get free glasses but if you can scrape together the money there are now amazing corrective glasses ( and contact lenses) which can actually stop their eyes getting worse.

Apparently short sightedness is massively on the rise amongst younger children because they spend too much time looking at screens and not enough time looking into the distance.

Is this worth two threads? Lots of children have glasses. Her prescription is mild. It is only a big deal because you are making it one. It is your job to get your child through minor traumas like this, not magnify them by getting upset.

Was it spontaneous upset or did she experience your reaction to it before becoming upset. If you started consoling her or saying it is ok to wear glasses you will have told her that it isn't really fine. She may have been responding to your upset not her own at wearing glasses per se.

Kids aren't stupid they can tell when we are upset and react accordingly. They can also distinguish between what our bodies do and what our mouths say. Your threads on here... Especially the title of the first referencing your upset suggests that you hate the idea of her in glasses and she has picked up on that.

She's not had them yet. She was upset picking a pair yesterday and was saying she didn't like none of them. I was telling her I was jealous how beautiful the glasses was she could pick and how mine were boring colours (i wear did reading only)
A little girl in her class wears them and sometimes she comes home from school upset saying that someone said something mean to her friend who wears glasses. From going to wearing no glasses for 7 years to now needing them in a shock for anyone.

No she started crying as soon as the optician told us she needed them and yes I did reassure her and so did the optician

While weak really, it's probably a strong enough prescription to make a real difference to how she sees things.

DS1 had ( -2, so opposite to your daughter) glasses about that age. I can still picture his face when he walked out of the opticians into a massive shopping centre with hundreds of lights on the ceiling, and just staring at them in awe.

See what she thinks when her vision is clear. She may well have a change of heart at that point.

Otherwise, deep breath. She needs them. Find a pair she likes. Build up the time she spends in them.

I have no idea what my dd's prescription is but her optician described her as 'quite long sighted'. I'm amazed at what she can't read when they do the eye test. I think she was probably 7/8 when she first got hers.

It's really no big deal. It seemed a big deal at first because it was something dh and I have absolutely no experience in. Neither of us has ever worn glasses. But really it's no big deal. We played it up as look what cool glasses you get and you can choose the ones you want and the case. Dd actually looks really good in glasses and they really suit her.

How much does she wear them? Not as much as she should. I don't know if she wears them at all at school. She has them with her and is meant to. But without someone telling her to put them on, I don't know that she does. She doesn't wear them much at home for reading. She should. But again, she tends to read at bedtime and they will be downstairs in her school bag. She seems to manage fine, but I suspect reading would be easier if she actually wore them when she was meant to. Having two pairs would help but that's £££.

I've found she will wear them more when family visit us who also wear glasses. So I think making it really normal and routine helps. She doesn't see dh and I wear glasses because we don't wear glasses, so she doesn't put them on. When people are around who wear glasses, she'll suddenly start wearing them regularly.

She wouldn't pick a pair so I picked a pair for her and we looked at lots of people online shows she watches of people who were glasses. I spoke about it last night and told her I was so jealous she has beautiful pink glasses and mine were morning black ones. She was still upset and told me she still doesn't want them of course she will change her mind over time but I still don't like seeing my kids upset

There are good suggestions on your other thread about a way forward.... Finding positive role models or getting second opinions. As someone who failed their exams because I couldn't see the board I would recommend the former.

Thank you for this positive comment. I know his not a massive deal but even if my child falls and cries it upsets me so I don't like her crying to me telling me she doesn't want glasses. Even me telling her how beautiful they are and how I'm jealous about her pink glasses etc she was still telling me no she doesn't want them
So I posted on here as I hoped someone who was going thru the same or been through the same had some advice

It's only a big deal because you're making it one

Jeez, when I started wearing glasses, there was one type of Edna Everidge nhs ones and that was that.

I was so chuffed when I got a red pair privately at 11.

Get the kid to wear the glasses, you see and hear better with them on.

Its not a big deal OP, your over catastrophising it. As you did on the over thread

My DD is nearly 9 and has worn glasses since she was 5. She no longer has to wear them all day anymore but she knows when she needs them. She is one of many in her class who wear glasses and has never once had any negative comments towards her because of it.

OP. You are being bloody ridiculous. It's glasses she will be fine. Its not heartbreaking. Whats heartbreaking is the article I've just read on the poor child left to die of starvation next to the body of his dead father.

I had to wear much stronger prescription than that as a child. My parents were also quite late in noticing I had poor eyesight.
It was impacting on my concentration and achievement at school and almost certainly on things like my hand/eye coordination (ball skills etc) and I had been characterised as a bit of a clumsy kid who was bad at sport.
Getting glasses upset me too and I cried in the opticians. But I got over it and life was certainly better in focus.
+2 is pretty mild. Mine was something like 6 or 7 from the off and has worsened as I have got older. Chin up both of you. It really isn't that bad and it's a life lesson for your DD albeit not a nice one.

Can I ask did she have problems with her eyes which made you get an eye test? Do you know what her eyes weee when she first needed them and what they are now that she doesn't need to wear all the time xx

@Hellomummy23 My DD and I wear glasses, I wish we had better eyesight but it is what it is. My DDs prescription is identical to your DDs (-2 I think you mean not +2?) and they make a huge difference to her eyesight. She was prescribed when she was 12 and was thrilled with how much better she could see the whiteboard in class. She moved to top set maths because she could see better!

Back in the 70s I squinted and fudged my way through my eye tests (got my sibling sitting next to me to whisper the letters!) and went without glasses for about 5 years. I couldn’t see anything on the board. It affected my education obviously. Just to be aware of that. As others have said she can switch to contacts in a few years.

Maybe think of a treat for your DD after each visit to opticians you and she go for cake or buy a comic or whatever she might like, just the two of you.

I started wearing glasses at age 8. As a child I didn’t care about being beautiful or pretty colours or fashionable frames. I was devastated because I was very sporty. I thought I would have to give up skateboarding and football. If my mum had gone on about looking beautiful and pretty pink glasses I would have become more upset, not less upset because I wouldn’t have felt heard or seen.

Think about how you are reassuring her, are you tuning into why she is upset at wearing glasses? Instead of going oh look how gorgeous you look, I am jealous you have pink glasses ( when she knows you can have pink ones if you want to), ask her why it upsets her and then see what can be done to reassure her.

In my case, my parents got me shatter proof glasses with a head band for playing sports and got me on contacts by age 10.

@Hellomummy23 forgot to say my DD wears hers all the time and is grateful for them.

Hi no hers is +2.00 it says on the form for both eyes. I don’t understand it I’ve attached a photo