Would you allow your 10yo on the train alone?

[MinnieMountain]

We’re thinking of letting DS get the train to his DGPs for the day without us.
He would be 10 and a half by the time we get round to it. Train is 20 minutes and he’d get off at the first stop.
Would you? He’s pretty sensible.

You could always ring him after 15 minutes to remind him about gathering up his stuff ready for his stop.

Yes I would let my ten year old do this.

We live in a big city and use public transport a lot though,including for school,so she’s experienced and knows her way around.

Mine got a train to school age just 11. One stop. No problems

It depends on a few things but No I probably wouldn’t.
it’s low probability, high risk.

there are a few things that could happen that your child just isn’t equipped to deal with at that age.

No I wouldn’t.
I used to travel by train to high school
Have book full of ( not funny) stories
There are (were?) a lot of undesirables around.

No. My main concern would be something going wrong with the journey...trains stops, is diverted, delayed etc. Plus potential for weirdos

For me it would be a no just because what would he do if 2 seconds after the train left the station some weird bloke sat next to him despite there being many empty seats and started talking to him. Would he move seats? Would he freeze?

I would at 12 because by then my sons were taller than me and also at secondary so were more used to being around full sized adults on a day to day basis.

I'd wait until at least 12-13.

I think that’s what clinches it- what if something happened. Plus he doesn’t have/need a phone yet.

No.

Yes.

My DC started getting the bus into town (often with a friend but not always) at about this age so I think it's OK. I am also surprised at those saying No Way. When then?

I agree a phone and advice wrt GPs being late/not there is a good idea.

Those who say "what if someone dodgy sat next to him" - I mean that could happen to any age child. You need to make sure your 10yo is aware that this could happen and what he should do. I hope no one is saying a 14yo should not travel alone. Everyone needs to be aware of how to react if a situation makes them uncomfortable. 10yo is old enough to negotiate that.

Lol just read your update about where OP - I am from Spalding and have travelled that line many times. As a child as well yes that' should be fine

Those saying "what if he misses his stop" unless the line has expanded somewhat (!) that's not possible anyway, Spalderoo is the end of the line!

How about several practise runs? I would go with him but sit away from him and just see how he copes. Do it a few times and judge from there. Another six months and he'll be going to secondary school and negotiating these situations each day.

No becsue it's completely unnecessary. Either you or the grandparents could travel with him.

When we feel they are ready? 10 is too young imo and I live in an area that is rough so I wouldn’t allow it, just the other day on my local Facebook page someone posted that their niece had been abused on a bus by some other teens who spat at her and tried to set her coat on fire (she didn’t know them) I would be worried about a 10 year old having a phone out alone here anyway as he will likely get robbed so that would make him less safe in my area.

This was on the bus and the driver did not intervene.

@clary . The train is Peterborough to Lincoln or Doncaster now.
Re the phone, we’re going to get him one at the start of Year 6. Wouldn’t want to earlier than planned especially for this.
I was an 80’s child too AND grew up in the depths of Pembrokeshire, so always felt safe.

No, definitely not. I’ve had a few scary moments on quiet trains during the day. Crazy man high on drugs was particularly bad. The logistics of it are fine but you can’t plan for who they might come across on that particular day. (Although odds are it will probably fine I would worry too much, especially if they don’t have a phone and often guards can’t be found)

Nope. Without a phone too? Double nope.

Like another poster said, if it was a compulsory journey then maybe.

I'm surprised at the train lines saying you need to be 12! Travelling by train to secondary school is quite normal where I live, potentially involving a change of platform. I think the difference with that is they are usually doing it in a small group and probably have phones.

The train is Peterborough to Lincoln or Doncaster now.

Neither of these journeys are 20 minutes. They are 2 and 3 times that.

I have a 10 year old. No. And neither would any of his Friends parents.
However there are some 10 year olds in year 6 who I think would be fine.

I regularly see secondary school kids travelling across London on the Thames link to school. Some of them are quite small so I’m guessing year 7/8.

However, they are 1) in uniform, 2) the train is really busy and there’s loads of staff 3) usually in groups

I really think it’s different than travelling across rural East Midlands.

I think @MinnieMountain meant that the train now goes on from Spalding where her DS would et off (20 mins) to Donnie/Lincoln hence it is possible to miss his stop.

Maybe that was always the case - well Lincoln perhaps. Pretty sure they never went to Doncaster tho so I am glad of some expansion in the railway service!

I still think it's OK. I would get him a phone now tho - he must be an unusual 10.5yo not to have one

Lol at "rural East Midlands" being a den of iniquity but central London being OK. I have lived in both and I've deffo seen worse things in London. And more people ignoring those things tbh.

(Should add that despite this I also have no issue with secondary school pupils travelling to school on public transport in London. Or even 10yos taking the Tube.

@muddyford

That's a bit presumptuous they might live walking distance to school or have a school bus. Why would you assume he'll be taking the train?

I suppose unless you're local & know he'll need to. In which case apologies.

@MinnieMountain given everything you have said, I'd probably let him tbh. You need to help them become independent & able to think for themselves, I'd talk him through what he'd do in certain situations, but I'd let him do it.

He’ll be cycling to secondary school.
He’s changed his mind about going alone now, so it’s a moot point given it was a non-essential trip.