Could you tell me about life with boys?

[Joelle3]

If you were lucky enough to be able to conceive, and your first child was a boy, could you tell me about having a second boy?

I am someone who has sort of daydreamed about having a girl one day (still HIGHLY aware of how lucky I am to be able to have a child at all) and I’m now needing to adjust the picture of what my life will look like.

If you have 2 or more boys, what has surprised you about being their parent? Do you sometimes still pine for a girl if you did before, or has your experience shifted that? Are there benefits to raising boys that you didn’t consider before?

Thanks so much - sent with loads of love for anyone struggling with fertility x

I have two boys. It's great, though I don't have any girls so can't compare.

What I will say is they are very different, one is shy and quite into "girly" stuff, the other is a stereotypically boys boy, dinosaurs, cars etc the lot. So biological sex, while meaningful, isn't all that predictive of the type of child you'll have. I've enjoyed seeing how different two boys born just two years apart can be, and it's really made me reflect on nature vs nurture etc.

I think one thing that is different to my friends with girls or a mix is the sheer physicality of them. They wrestle, play fight, push and pull each other, sprint everywhere. My friends with daughters I've noticed are more likely to be able to sit them at a cafe table with a colouring book. Mine just can't do that. Not scientific though.

Both of mine are incredibly affectionate and loving and totally want mummy all the time.

@TheMoth of course, lots of words are banned in this house, but they still say them when they’re angry. They get told off, but it doesn’t stop them doing it again. The scream at each other when fighting.

Both likely neurodivergent with very poor emotional regulation.

Let me just go and find the “Perfect Parent” trophy that’s always knocking around somewhere on MN….

😂

But seriously - I don’t believe there is a single household out there (except yours of course) where siblings don’t screech, bicker and shout very loudly at times. That’s totally normal.

If I only I knew that a raised eyebrow was all it took to control my feral children by the age of 7….

😂

I love my 2 boys 14 and 17. They get on well and both play the same sport.

One of the unexpected bonuses is that whilst I didn't really sit down until the youngest was 4 for more than 15 mins now I have the pleasure of 2 really nice young men. No teenage daughter angst / friendship stress / monthly woes even I like to think I have some 'money in the bank'

They never stop fighting or fucking screaming at each other and one of them is always upset with the other.

It's a fucking head wreck and I can't wait for them to go back to school.

Good luck.

@2024BigWhoop 😂😂😂if only. I’m excellent at raising one eyebrow perfectly too. DS2 has just stomped upstairs in a huff because DH told him off, and I can hear him go into their bedroom and disrupt DS1’s Lego building. A fight is breaking out. I’ll test the eyebrow theory shall I!

@ICanTuckMyBoobsInMyPockets I feel your pain, although I do love the holidays to be fair as I hate the school run, and mine are better behaved at home when they’re not exhausted from school (sometimes, not always!).

My boys are great, they are loving and caring. They don't fight with each other, they are easy going and independent. There are a few scuffles with other boys, but not the high emotional drama that girls can bring

Just to say not all boys are boisterous, loud and sporty! Zero football, cricket or mud in this house, never has been. They like music.

I am relieved I don't have to deal with teenage period issues as I remember how bad that was for me and glad I don't have to see my kid go though that.

Yeah throw yourself into Marvel and Starwars, switch games and Minecraft and you’ll always have something to chat about.

and it’s just fun, they have so much energy

Noisy but low drama

I have multiple boys and multiple girls. They're all different and individual and their sex doesn't really come into their personality.