Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Parenting

For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

Flip

1 2 3 4

Original poster

Do you leave kids alone and nip to the toilet?

96 replies

Awonderfuldayinthepark · 14/12/2023 18:07

I was in McDonald’s and only I needed a wee, 3 children 8, 6 and 5 all eating and colouring.

I ran to the loo. Left my phone with the 8 year old, told him to look after his younger brother and made them all repeat back to me to not move.

I’ve been doing this for about a year, only in local places that we have been to before. Probably started doing this once the youngest started school. They are all good sensible(ish) kids.

I felt like I got a strangle look off this one woman which made me question if I should leave them alone?

Do you/would you leave them for a few minutes?

Also, when we arrived at McDonald’s I ordered they all go and sit down. I can see them enough to know where they are but again questioning this too!!

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

AmyandPhilipfan · 15/12/2023 00:10

Our McDonald's has a table of IPads so if my daughter is occupied using one of those I have nipped to the loo alone. She was possibly only 4 the first time I did it, but it is a rare occurrence.

The only time I've left her and felt really uncomfortable about it is when we were at a Haven site. She was in the soft play, which was in the arcade area so lots of people in and out a lot. I was watching her but suddenly got stomach pain and knew I needed the loo pretty quickly. She'd just made friends with some kids and was having fun and I didn't want to pull her away from that or have to explain in front of people that I was desperate for the toilet. So I just told her I was popping to the loo and not to leave the soft play frame. The toilets were in the same building and I was as quick as I could be but I was a bit worried all the time. She was 5 at the time, and fine, and still in the soft play frame when I returned.

At our local soft play there's a staffed desk to sign in at so I feel comfortable leaving her for a couple of minutes while I go to the attached restaurant's toilets which are much nicer that the stinky kids ones in the soft play!

lovinglaughingliving · 15/12/2023 01:03

I would and I do for my 4&6yo boys.

Perimama · 15/12/2023 01:17

I would if it was just for a couple of mins for a wee.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

8 year olds Families General parenting

tuttifuckinfruity · 15/12/2023 03:26

Yes, I would in that situation. We know our local McDonald's well and usually sit near the toilets. If they were settled eating / colouring and not restless I would leave them as I would only be gone around 90 seconds.

I would not, however, allow them to go to the toilets by themselves, particularly the male toilets. If they needed the toilet, we would all go together.

Flyhigher · 15/12/2023 06:52

I don't think I would. Especially the 5 year old.

liveforsummer · 15/12/2023 07:15

gentlemum · 14/12/2023 20:55

My children aren't yet of that age, but what I think I would do is take them with me as regardless of how much I trust my children, I don't feel I could trust other people. I think probably until they're all at least over the age of 10, if not older, I would make them come with me.

Christ, my 10 yo locks up the house in the morning and walks herself to school and back home again at the end of the day (often going to the shop or a friends en route - she will text me to let me know). Absurd to think I'd take her to the toilet now or indeed a year or 2 ago 😅

SallyWD · 15/12/2023 07:15

Seems fine and normal to me.

liveforsummer · 15/12/2023 07:16

bakewellbride · 14/12/2023 20:20

I would not do this - in my area there was an attempted abduction less than 5 years ago.

From a seated table on a busy restaurant?

Blinkin · 15/12/2023 07:21

gentlemum · 14/12/2023 21:49

@Blinkin they don't necessarily have to walk to secondary school by themselves as soon as they start. But maybe I'm being over cautious and younger than 10 would be fine. As I said my children aren't that age yet so I guess I don't really know how I'd feel at the time.

No they don't have to but it's considered good practice by both primaries and secondaries to build Y6 independence. If no SEND, secondaries expect children to be able to do certain things without adult support - walking to a local swimming pool for a lesson for example. There comes a point when you aren't doing the best by your children by not letting them do things for themselves, even though it might seen scary as a parent at first.

theleafandnotthetree · 15/12/2023 07:26

Mirrormeback · 14/12/2023 21:42

My cousin had twins and just didn't drink when out with them to avoid going to the loo like this

Not healthy or helpful but it was her only safe option

Was your cousin raising children in a war zone or something? 'Her only safe option'....we have completely lost the plot and any sense of perspective. Meanwhile, actual real life children are being killed everyday in Gaza, Yemen and plenty of other places and people here stop drinking water in case they have leave their children to use the loo in McDonald's.

MaryWhitehouseisCOOL · 15/12/2023 12:04

It's fine, generations of children brought themselves up!

LinguisticallyCunning · 15/12/2023 13:04

Children are statistically more at risk from people they know than from strangers. It seems like people have forgotten how resilient and sensible most children are and that their confidence can only grow when they're given chance to. We're raising a load of young adults who can't do the most basic things because they have been mollycoddled too much.

WonderLife · 15/12/2023 14:54

tiggergoesbounce · 14/12/2023 23:09

People are talking as if kids never go missing from busy places, we all know they do ?

The odds are minute, but it does happen.
I wouldn't take an unnecessary risk with young children.

Children get struck by lightening too though.
And get run over while walking on the pavement.
And they get shot by crazed madmen in the street.

Is it really true that you never take an unnecessary risk, or do you sometimes leave the house when you don't absolutely need to?
Have you never driven anywhere that wasn't 100% necessary? That's the biggest risk you take.

gentlemum · 16/12/2023 12:46

@WonderLife that's such a ridiculous comparison. What you're describing is being paranoid and basically never leaving the house to keep everyone as safe as possible. Living your life is not an unnecessary risk, but leaving your young kids alone for a few minutes when the alternative is they could come with you is an unnecessary risk.

AegonT · 16/12/2023 12:50

Sounds fine to me. I'm sure I briefly left DD out of my sight in public at those ages. She's sensible, wouldn't run off and knows to ask a member of staff or another mum if she needs help.

AegonT · 16/12/2023 13:08

To your second question: I only have girls and have let my oldest go into the ladies on her own since around 6.

MrsSlocombesCat · 07/05/2024 12:43

I sometimes wonder what the children of today will be like as adults with all this precious parenting. Of course it’s alright to pop to the loo and leave kids colouring. I can’t imagine anyone risking snatching a kid with siblings in the middle of a busy McDonalds.

Saschka · 07/05/2024 13:02

gentlemum · 14/12/2023 20:55

By the time OP’s youngest is over 10, her oldest will be 13. You cannot seriously mean you are going to make a year 9 child, deciding on their GCSE options, come into the toilet with you?

Guineaguineaguinea · 07/05/2024 13:05

I do but I don’t leave my phone or my bag. As someone is more likely to want to grab that whilst it’s not attended by an adult. And dc may respond in a number of ways that I can’t anticipate so I feel it puts them in a more vulnerable position.

Jewel52 · 07/05/2024 20:31

bananamangoes · 14/12/2023 18:53

It's highly unlikely that a kid would be snatched from mcdonalds whilst the parent has nipped to the loo

Some people have vivid imaginations

Finally some common sense 🙏

ladygindiva · 07/05/2024 20:34

7 yo twins here, yes I'd leave them at a table in McDonald's. If I thought I was going to be a long time ( very busy , big queue etc) I have asked the nearest kind looking older lady to keep an eye for a mo and they always seem happy to, and I am always happy to be asked too.

Flip

1 2 3 4