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Original poster

Do you leave kids alone and nip to the toilet?

96 replies

Awonderfuldayinthepark · 14/12/2023 18:07

I was in McDonald’s and only I needed a wee, 3 children 8, 6 and 5 all eating and colouring.

I ran to the loo. Left my phone with the 8 year old, told him to look after his younger brother and made them all repeat back to me to not move.

I’ve been doing this for about a year, only in local places that we have been to before. Probably started doing this once the youngest started school. They are all good sensible(ish) kids.

I felt like I got a strangle look off this one woman which made me question if I should leave them alone?

Do you/would you leave them for a few minutes?

Also, when we arrived at McDonald’s I ordered they all go and sit down. I can see them enough to know where they are but again questioning this too!!

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Simonjt · 14/12/2023 21:18

Yeah it would be fine. I wouldn’t take my eight year to the toilet with me, our two year old would likely be outside asleep in the pram while we ate.

Stressfordays · 14/12/2023 21:23

I'd leave mine if they were sensible kids. If you've got bolters or silly kids then you'd have to reassess. I have an 11, 8 and 5 year olds. Id happily leave all of them while I nipped loo.

Jules912 · 14/12/2023 21:32

I'd leave both my 11 and 8 year old individually but would hesitate to leave them together as they're likely to argue. 8 year old has ASD and would probably insist on coming with me anyway, so if DH isn't around I tend to go before ordering and then when finished ( if required).
It also depends how close the loos are. I'm used to be more relaxed ( at least with the older one) until we got evacuated from a public building ( not a restaurant)due to a fire and I realised that I would've had to go against the crowd to get to the toilet if they'd been in it.

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MissBuffyAnneSummers · 14/12/2023 21:40

Yea I did.

Mirrormeback · 14/12/2023 21:42

My cousin had twins and just didn't drink when out with them to avoid going to the loo like this

Not healthy or helpful but it was her only safe option

gentlemum · 14/12/2023 21:49

@Blinkin they don't necessarily have to walk to secondary school by themselves as soon as they start. But maybe I'm being over cautious and younger than 10 would be fine. As I said my children aren't that age yet so I guess I don't really know how I'd feel at the time.

riotlady · 14/12/2023 21:56

DD is nearly 6 and I’ve left her in this scenario (McDonald’s soft play while I popped to the loo). I wouldn’t somewhere bigger and busier but she has shown herself to be sensible in these situations.

I think these little tiny bits of trust and independence are good for kids. She’s started asking us to sit at a table further away in the soft play for example- not cos she’s up to anything naughty, but just because she wants that feeling of being a little bit more independent.

SusanKennedyshouldLTB · 14/12/2023 22:09

No. I would never do that. Is there a medical reason you need to go to the toilet and cannot wait? Could you take then all in that case into the disabled toilet between ordering and getting your food?

ActDottie · 14/12/2023 22:10

I don’t know. I think it would depend on how far the toilet was from the kids as well. Like if I had to go up a flight of stairs probably not. If the toilet was right there next to the table I would.

Justfinking · 14/12/2023 22:12

If probably try and avoid it but if you need to go to the toilet you don't have much choice! Also I'm more paranoid than your average person.

LyingLikeACheapCarpet · 14/12/2023 22:16

This is also another example of failure to assess risk.

The most dangerous part in this scenario is the journey too and from Maccys. People don't worry about the roads but they worry about the lower chance of choking (which could be mitigated by asking them to wait, or going before or after food) and the even lower chance of stranger danger.

WeightoftheWorld · 14/12/2023 22:18

I'd maybe leave the older two and take the youngest with you? My eldest is 5 and I can't imagine leaving her in this type of situation yet. I appreciate they wouldn't be alone but as people have said, it's putting a lot on the eldest then.

AuntMarch · 14/12/2023 22:20

I have worked with children for the last 15 years so I've known many, and the only answer I can give here is I would trust some 8 year olds to be left with some 5 year olds for the less than 5 minutes this would be.
There are also some I wouldn't want to leave together for 30 seconds unsupervised!

My own child is 4. I'd trust him to behave with his cousin, it would depend more on the place/people. But he is adamant he has to go first any time I need a wee anyway so he'd still be coming with me.

Christmassss · 14/12/2023 22:22

That’s far too much responsibility for the 8 year old, what if something did happen to the younger DC?

drad · 14/12/2023 22:25

No way. Not those ages.

AuntMarch · 14/12/2023 22:25

LyingLikeACheapCarpet · 14/12/2023 20:33

There isn't room in the cubicle for three kids so I can't see how they are safer if you drag them with you.

Yes at those ages I would leave them

Good point, they'd be safer in a room full of other people than outside the cubicle where someone could follow knowing they'd then be on their own!

Which is extremely unlikely to the point of being ridiculous, but it is extremely unlikely anyone's snatching kids in a mcdonalds with so many people around full stop so I'm only saying this wouldn't help if they were!

Tozin · 14/12/2023 22:30

Yeah I would. No way would I drag 3 children to the mcds toilets (always very crampt might add)

Daisybuttercup12345 · 14/12/2023 22:35

gentlemum · 14/12/2023 20:55

My children aren't yet of that age, but what I think I would do is take them with me as regardless of how much I trust my children, I don't feel I could trust other people. I think probably until they're all at least over the age of 10, if not older, I would make them come with me.

Oh dear.

idontlikealdi · 14/12/2023 22:39

No I wouldn't have done at that age.

scrivette · 14/12/2023 22:54

Yes I would leave them although I don't think I would leave my phone as they would get distracted with it.

NortieTortie · 14/12/2023 22:56

I left mine for the first time a few weeks ago to use the loo. dc (8 and 6) were happily eating and colouring like yours. No one batted an eye. Wouldn't have done it if they were younger though.

Ruffpuff · 14/12/2023 23:01

I strongly believe in giving kids tidbits of independence and responsibility. I see no issues with this. My 5 year old would be fine left to sit while I went to the toilet (but only in the last month or so). Maybe I’d take the youngest with me, but tbh the risk is lower than people would think in this situation.

tiggergoesbounce · 14/12/2023 23:09

People are talking as if kids never go missing from busy places, we all know they do ?

The odds are minute, but it does happen.
I wouldn't take an unnecessary risk with young children.

sprigatito · 14/12/2023 23:13

No, I'd make them come with me.

Sometimeswinning · 14/12/2023 23:17

gentlemum · 14/12/2023 20:55

My children aren't yet of that age, but what I think I would do is take them with me as regardless of how much I trust my children, I don't feel I could trust other people. I think probably until they're all at least over the age of 10, if not older, I would make them come with me.

You’re kidding right? I’m just picturing my 11 year old sons face if I took him to the ladies so mummy could have a wee!