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Original poster

What time does your 6yo go to sleep?

28 replies

Mummyof287 · 11/09/2023 22:02

Not go to bed, but actually settle to sleep....
DD is 6, we have always had big problems with her sleep- she woke alot in the night for the first couple of years, needed lots of support to settle to sleep.

She rarely wakes during the night since the past few years, but bedtimes are a nightmare...she hasn't gone to bed before 9ish other than a handful of occasions for the last couple of years.Sometimes she is up and downstairs saying she can't sleep, she can't just lie there and let herself relax it seems.Sometimes she looks so tired, but just can't seem to switch off.

We have tried cutting down on sugar, giving her fidget toys/books, audio cds (music and stories) getting her up earlier, putting her to bed at different times....nothing has consistently worked.
The last couple of nights her bedtimes have been 10/10.30....when this happens and she has a school day to get through I have to get her up later the next morning to compensate, which then impacts on the next night, making her settle later.

She is awaiting an assessment for potential ADHD, but sometimes I wonder if all the symptoms are overtiredness.
Or maybe it is ADHD that is causing her sleep issues, who knows.It is frustrating for both her and for us.

I just wondered what time your 6 (ish) yo to go to sleep? And wakes up in the morning?

DD on an average night is maybe 9pm-7am.

And what time do you start and finish their bedtimes routine? Maybe ours is too late.

Many thanks!

OP posts:
Billi80 · 11/09/2023 23:51

Since summer holidays rarely asleep before 9.30pm…

whereisthecheese · 12/09/2023 00:53

10pm unless hes exhausted but I suspect he's not the norm so really I'm replying to bump your post because I'm interested too!

coxesorangepippin · 12/09/2023 00:54

DD is knackered and asleep by 8pm most nights

Up around 7am ish

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thecatinthetwat · 12/09/2023 00:57

I think 9 is fine. But then most would disagree.

TheGriffle · 12/09/2023 01:00

We take dd6 up around 7 or just after. She settles down to actually go to sleep just after 8 and is generally asleep by half past. She’s an early riser though and normally up anywhere from 6am onwards.

woodyscowboyhat · 12/09/2023 01:31

Gosh I must be mean, we go up for 6.30 and asleep for 7. He needs it though and doesn't refuse.

Upsadiddles · 12/09/2023 01:45

Usually between 8:30 and 9 for my similar sounding 6 year old, sometimes later. She’s never needed that much sleep and has dropped off around that time since she was tiny (I’m also starting to suspect ADHD). My toddler is completely different. She has always needed more sleep and generally settles much more easily despite me not really doing anything obviously different with her.

Montii · 12/09/2023 01:46

Usually between 7.30 and 8pm and he gets up anywhere between 6.15 and 7am generally.

Ragwort · 12/09/2023 03:33

My DS was in bed by 7pm at that age .. not sure if he immediately went to sleep as we always said goodnight and left the room but I assume so as he never came downstairs .. woke around 7am .. he's always been a very good sleeper - I think we were just very lucky.
The night he went to Beavers he was allowed a 'late night' but otherwise we stuck to a 7pm bedtime for years.

4intheCorner · 12/09/2023 04:53

Neurodiverse people lack the sleep hormone melatonin. DS's bedtime used to be a 3 hour violent ordeal. Melatonin has been a life saver and he's now asleep by 7:30.

Once diagnosed, hopefully the team will proscribe melatonin to help.

VanillaFlotilla · 12/09/2023 05:10

Mine DD6 goes to sleep around 9pm, wakes up around 7.30. Sleeps in later on weekends

Caspianberg · 12/09/2023 05:23

My Ds is only 3. But a typical night would be 9pm and wide awake by 6am. Can’t get him to sleep any longer. Often he’s in bed by 8.30pm and will fidget until gone 10pm also. He’s never slept long, even as newborn.
The only day he ever fell asleep at 6.30pm was in the car, we lifted him and out into bed. He was wide awake at 3am! And stayed awake until the following night at 9pm

Newtothis2005 · 12/09/2023 05:29

Up for 7pm and asleep within half an hour. Going by these responses I feel mean

Muststopeating · 12/09/2023 05:32

DD is 6, eldest. Has always loved her sleep. Would probably still have an afternoon nap if she could.

Ideally, I have them in bed, lights out by 7. In reality that can slip to 7.30 and very rarely 8.

She shares with her brother, who is a fidget but she generally ignores him and is usually asleep by 7.30. She wakes anytime between 6 & 7... but stays in bed til her clock goes yellow at 7. It's rare she's not been through for the loo before 6.45 though.

11 hours feels right for her. But I am considering talking to the GP because she is constantly knackered and she looks exhausted all the time (it is frequently commented on by others) despite an active (but not crazy so) lifestyle, loads of outdoor time, a pretty healthy diet and limited screen time.

Goldbar · 12/09/2023 05:54

I think 9 is fine, personally. Children that age need around 10-12 hours sleep.

From experience, I know that my 5yo is at the lower end of this (so around 10-11 hours). I aim for bedtime between 8 and 9pm for a 7am wake-up.

Batatahara · 12/09/2023 07:18

Bedtime is 7ish, sometimes drifts to 7:30.

He reads and potters around till 7:30/8, I think but not totally sure.

He is up between 6 and 7 usually.

He has a younger brother which influences things - if he was an only child, we would probably have moved to 7:30/8 for bedtime but it's convenient to have them on the same schedule

WhatWouldMrMannersSay · 12/09/2023 07:20

Mine goes to sleep late - between 9 and 10 usually sometimes later.

He goes to his room at 7pm, and reads, potters around, draws, listens to his audiobooks. Basically whatever quiet down time he wants. We live right next to the school and leave at 8.58am - he doesn't need to be up and out early.

My DH is a night owl and I think DS takes after him. I'm the opposite and so far my DDs seem more like me.

Justme10 · 12/09/2023 07:48

My DS (5) is always up between 6-7am so I usually take him up about 6.30pm for him to be asleep by 7/7.30pm. He loves his sleep and needs a long sleep or he's a nightmare the next day.

Phos · 12/09/2023 07:50

Goes to bed 8ish but can be 9 before she’s asleep. Probably autistic though (under assessment) so that may be why - she’s had low sleep needs since she was a baby, dropped naps entirely at 19 months.

TropicalTrama · 12/09/2023 07:52

In her room for 7, can play though and doesn’t have to sleep. I usually check after we’ve had dinner so 8.15 ish and she’s always asleep so guessing she falls asleep at 7.45-8ish. Up for the day between 6.30 and 7 which suits us perfectly.

IveFoundOldBear · 12/09/2023 07:57

We try to be in bed for 7, but after stories and cuddle and then leaving her it's usually 8ish she's asleep, she's almost 6.

Shares a room with 3 year old sister so always go early to go together - except on Rainbows night when she gets a pass to stay up later and is usually asleep between 8.30-9!

They are both early risers though up at 6-6.30 most days regardless of how late to bed so need the early nights.

hdbs17 · 12/09/2023 08:06

Head off to bed at 7:45pm, is normally asleep by 8:15pm. Sometimes DS does lay awake for a while and will pop out of his room at 8:30 for the loo but that's normally all we'll see if him until 6am.

We've just upped from head off at 7:30pm.

At weekends and school holidays however, it's more like 8:30/9pm.

Youcancallmeirrelevant · 12/09/2023 08:12

Dinner at 5/5:30 then time to play.
7pm we go upstairs and do teeth, pjs on etc, then she watches her kindle in bed for 20/30mins and then turns it off and goes to sleep from 7:45.

She normally wakes up about 7am next day for school

Caspianberg · 12/09/2023 09:32

Tbh I would find 7pm bed quite hard logistically, as it would mean 6.30pm latest up for pjs/ teeth/ story. With work and life we usually eat dinner around 6.30pm, eat and tidy takes until 7.30pm and then a bit of playing, bath etc, it’s already 8.30pm.

Up at 6/6.30am is also fine as nursery starts 8am.

PaperNests · 12/09/2023 09:39

Bath at 8:30pm, bed at 9pm, stories and music until she falls asleep generally around 9:30pm but sometimes not till 10pm. She wakes at 7am for school but sleeps in later at the weekends when she's been known to lie in until 9am. When she had an earlier bedtime she would wake in the early hours of the morning and not go back off. This works well for us all. It also helps that by 9pm she's asking to go to sleep so there's never a struggle to get her to go to bed either like we used to have when it was earlier.