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Original poster

Will I regret giving baby a dummy?

93 replies

FelisMargarita · 31/08/2023 08:42

My 5 week old is waking every 1-2 hours. Apart from one 4 hour fluke, he’s never slept for more than 2 hours. I’m thinking of introducing a dummy but worried about making things worse in the long term if he’s reliant on it for sleep. Also weaning off dummies sounds tricky. To be honest, I don’t really like dummies but I’m desperate for sleep. Am I being silly by being so reluctant? Do short term benefits outweigh the negative?

Im grateful to anyone who can share their experiences, good or bad.

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Original poster

FelisMargarita · 31/08/2023 14:13

Thank you so much everyone for sharing your experiences! I'm still not sure which way I will go. This will probably be a decision made late at night but I feel more confident in offering a dummy if we're at that point, which we probably are unless there's a bit of improvement tonight.

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Original poster

FelisMargarita · 31/08/2023 14:15

Strokethefurrywall · 31/08/2023 11:14

Yep, used one from 4 weeks with the first (he dropped it at 1 year) and day 1 with my second. He could have sucked milk out of a rock, that kid was a prolific sucker! He dropped his at 3 (night time).

Both were a total miracle. Both breastfed, and allowed me to rest. There was no nipple "confusion" etc.

Haha yes I feel like this kid is a prolific sucker too. Sucked milk out of a rock 😂

OP posts:

SouthLondonMum22 · 31/08/2023 14:19

Dummies are wonderful. I've used one from birth, brought one to the hospital.

Give it a try and see if it settles baby.

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Workawayxx · 31/08/2023 14:19

I tried with my first (a "suck milk out of a rock" type and a horrific sleeper) but he wouldn't take one - offered maybe 8 weeks. With my second she had a dummy from early on and I haven't once regretted it other than maybe a short phase where she would lose it in the night and not be able to find it. But it was still so easy to get up and shove it back in. She still has it night times and naps age 2.5 but is a great sleeper so I think we'll leave it till she's 3 and reassess. We only ever used it for sleep or if ill but sometimes nursery would give it for short periods when she was little and "emotional" - it was handy that there was something she could gain comfort from. Her teeth look fine.

TheBirdintheCave · 31/08/2023 14:19

The only thing I regretted was not taking it away by the age of one. By the time we decided it was time for the dummy fairy to come (aged two) our son was old enough to miss it. If we're lucky enough to have another child we'll be removing the dummy earlier.

RoseRows · 31/08/2023 14:28

It’s worth a try! I was against dummies for some reason at the start but they definitely gave my little girl some comfort and they actually lower the risk of SIDS too

Twizbe · 31/08/2023 14:40

Give it a go and see what happens. My eldest had one and loved it. It was easy to get rid off using the dummy fairy.

my youngest refused all bottles and dummies. She’s a thumb sucker. She’s 4 and still sucks he thumb (though not as often). I can’t send her thumb to the dummy fairy though.

shakeitoffsis · 31/08/2023 14:45

Dummies are great. My 11 month old has hers for sleep only it lives in her cot. When my other daughter turned 2 I cut the teat off and she held it to sleep and then forgot about it. It was so much easier than I imagined. I disagree with toddlers wandering around with a dummy hanging out of their mouth though all the time.

H930 · 31/08/2023 16:34

We gave DS1 a dummy around five weeks and he loved it. It was a total godsend and he slept really well with it. We stopped it just after he turned one to try and prevent damage to his teeth - the first night was awful and he screamed for two hours, but then laid down and slept fine, and after that didn’t seem to miss it at all 🤷‍♀️ based on our experience I would say do it but stop earlier rather than later. DS2 has a dummy sometimes but can take it or leave it really. DS1 was bottle fed so we didn’t have that consideration but as PP have said you might want to hold off a little if you are BF. It’s normal for tiny babies to wake a lot but it does get better quite quickly. DS2 is 12 weeks now and sleeps 4-5 hours at night before waking for a feed.

Sjh15 · 01/09/2023 17:29

My son has a dummy. He’s coming up to two and he’s sort of self weaning off of it. He went through stages of asking for it but now he would rather talk so only has it for naps and bed time. Even then, it falls out pretty early and he doesn’t wake up for it

Mamabear48 · 01/09/2023 17:39

1000% yes. You don’t see a grown up child or adult with a dummy. It’s temporary and it’s a godsend. My older got rid of hers at 2 took about a week to stop asking for it but was bearable. My 1 year old refused his dummy and it was so hard without it but then he got Covid at 6 months and we tried everything then he took the dummy which in turn helped when he was teething. He’s 2 in October and I’m ditching it. It’s not that hard and it’s not forever

3luckystars · 01/09/2023 17:42

je ne regrette rien

WeightoftheWorld · 01/09/2023 17:46

Both mine had dummies from being a week or so old. Eldest is now 5, and got rid at 3.5 with minimal fuss (only had it overnight in bed from the age of 2). Youngest is nearly 2 and we planning roughly the same. Both have great speech and no dental issues (all so far, of course!). I breastfed them both too without any dummy related issues.

JRM17 · 01/09/2023 17:47

Don't do it. Stick with it things will get better. I was 100% against a dummy for my DS (6) but then he was injured while being born and was in a lot of pain (cut under his eye, all the skin torn on the back of his head) and he screamed every 45mins or so (he had to be propped up on his side to stop his head touching the mattress but would roll back and then scream) so I gave him one but the second he was fully healed (8wks) the dummy was removed immediately. He was from that day and is a fantastic sleeper and I fully believe it is because he wouldn't wake up looking for the dummy. He slept 10-12 hrs from 10wks old and still sleeps a min of 10hrs a night now. Also dummies make kids talk funny and can delay speech and cause teeth to grow with longer incisors.

Rufusroo · 01/09/2023 18:12

I’m an ex-nanny (NNEB). In my first job looking after a newborn we had an amazing lady (ex nurse and very old-school) who came in daily for the first few weeks. She recommended a dummy and said to use it right from the start. Only downside was having to get up to put dummy back in if it fell out! But no problem getting baby to give it up - at about a year. I then followed her advice for my own two children and my DD has continued with her own two children. Only use the dummy for sleeping - don’t allow it during the day when baby is awake. Never dip the dummy in anything ie honey and wean baby off the dummy from about 10 months. My granddaughter was fairly late giving hers up - at about 18 months but it certainly didn’t impede her speech!
I do remember the Maternity Nurse saying that the sooner you introduce a dummy the more readily they will take to it and the easier it is to wean them off it. You may well find that even at only five weeks, you may have missed the golden window and your LO will just spit it out. But it’s certainly worth a try

dearanon · 01/09/2023 18:25

Both my children were nicu babies and we were advised to give them a dummy.

Blessedbethefruitz · 01/09/2023 18:43

My first, cmpa, reflux, ff baby had one from early on as he was miserable, and there are some sids benefits early on. He wouldn't give it up for any bribe under the sun though. He randomly forgot about it shortly after turning 3 (he's 4.5 now) and they suddenly disappeared so as not to remind him. He does still have loads of oat milk from a 'bottle' (sippee - took longer to give up baby bottles than the dummy) at night though due to low weight. His teeth are perfect so far...

His little sister refused one when I desperately tried to offer at 2 weeks. She was such a chilled baby and excellent breastfeeder, and my first was so non typical and screamed constantly, that I'd forgotten they go nuts and scream the place down if you don't put them to bed early enough 😅 Interestingly her baby doll (she's 19 months) does have a dummy which she goes mad if her brother pretends to use...

RedHelenB · 01/09/2023 18:45

2 of mine had dummies and were weaned off them no bother. One dc in particular was a very " sucky" baby amd would have been permanently attached to my books otherwise. One dc juat didn't take to them when offered.

Kwasi · 01/09/2023 19:00

Every couple of hours is normal. I read the Gina Ford sleep book, which says just gently ‘shhhhhh’ even with EBG babies. I did this and DS slept through the night from 10 weeks old.

DinnaeFashYersel · 01/09/2023 19:14

I regret not giving my second a dummy.

It took about 10 years to stop her sucking her thumb.

PurpleStar22 · 01/09/2023 19:23

I only have DS who is 11 now. We gave a dummy from birth pretty much (SCBU gave him one with our permission). He only had it when he was tired and when napping/sleeping. He pretty much weaned himself of them but we collected them all up from his cot and the dummy fairy came overnight and he got a cool little toy in exchange (It was May, so too late for Easter and too early for Christmas)

BillyNotQuiteNoMates · 01/09/2023 21:13

My oldest had a dummy until he was 3 and a half. My second had one for about a year. My third and fourth refused one. And my youngest had for a short time. Fact is, it’s a lot easier to take a dummy off a child, than it is to remove a thumb 🤷‍♀️

Phoenixfire1988 · 01/09/2023 23:13

Why do people have babies then act all shocked and upset they don't sleep ? It's not a secret that babies wake very frequently and you won't sleep much for quite a while .
If sleep is so important don't have kids it really is simple ,waking during the night reduces the risk of sids and at 5 weeks baby is still brand new they are crying for a reason

JLou08 · 01/09/2023 23:42

2 of my children had a dummy, weaned off with no problems. One didn't take to the dummy and sucked her fingers, she now has crooked teeth. There is research that suggests dummys can prevent SIDS. I don't think there is an issue with dummys as long as you wean off before 2.

Titchyfeep · 02/09/2023 00:53

I have 3 kids. 1st and last took a dummy. Middle refused a dummy but sucked her thumb. It has taken until the age of 10 to get her to stop. It has been infuriating. A dummy is a million times easier to get rid of so personally I would just let them have the dummy if you think it will help.

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