To defer a bright child

[Clairebear231]

My son has always been bright, potty trained early, good speech from a young age etc I have never had any concerns. He is due to start school this September at 4 years and 2 months. All professionals say he is capable and ready....but I've recently found out I can defer him starting until next year when he will 5 years and 2 months giving him a big advantage throughout his school career.
My DH is very against this and feels he will be fine in school but I don't want him to be just fine I'd like him to excel, I'm also worried he will struggle being one of the youngest both academically and socially.
What are your thoughts on this? Has anyone not deferred a bright child and then regretted it or vice versa?

My DD is a very late August baby. All of the kids that were in my antenatal group but not born until September are completely fed up with nursery and all kids who went to school in September have been thriving.

My DD is literally 2 days from the cut off so I wasn't sure about her going into reception but she's been absolutely great. She's loved her first year and isn't at all behind academically.

I have a summer born due to start in sept, his speech is amazing doesn’t stop talking and he knows numbers and letters but cannot read or draw and doesn’t like sitting still , doesn’t like interacting with children unless he knows them really well but then still struggles with sharing. Im sending him part time untill easter , if part time is still too much I will just pull him out and home school. I did want to defer but then got too scared with all the stories of being moved class when they’re bigger and the sports clubs. The thing is there are literally 30 kids in reception class with a teacher and a TA , two if you’re lucky. If you have a child that isn’t ready they aren’t going to get the attention they need and support school is absolutely MANIC, they are too little to start I think 6 is an ideal age.

The class sizes are so bad and wrong they are too big.

@Nepmarthiturn it has nothing to do with disabilities or anything like that. The Government's code on this is clear that parents do not need a "reason" to request the deferral

perhaps not, but their advice for parents guide gives examples of when you might like to hold them back and these are disabilities, delays and severe prematurity.

My Son started reception 2 weeks after his 4th birthday, he's now coming to the end of Y1 and he's 6 in August and he's absolutely smashing it, his reading is fantastic and he reasiage 7-11 books, his maths is great and knows times tables, spelling and story writing, I was unsure if to keep him back but he'd have been bored repeating pre-school year....some children in his class are 12-15mths older then him too

My DDs are both august born. My youngest was due September and should really be in the year below where she currently is. But academically she’s at the top of the class. In nursery they were running out of work for her without stepping into reception work which they didn’t really want to do. But if she had been born in her due date she would have likely started nursery the same time (they had some spaces so some September kids started when they turned 4 in September) and then they would have struggled to keep her busy for an entire other year. She is a bit emotionally below some of her older peers and when she stands next to the September kids who are over 11 months older than her it’s very noticeable that she’s a yea behind them developmentally. But it would have been a bad thing to defer her. My eldest is probably top end of average academically but has always come across older and and when stood next to her peers looks older too. She 13 and at her drama group where there are kids from other schools up to the age of 17 a few had asked her how her GCSEs had gone. She manages really well at school and I don’t think another year in nursery would mean she would do any better academically.

It’s ultimately your decision and it sounds like you don’t really care what people think (not sure why you posted). I personally think there has to be a cut off though. There’s always going to be the older kids and younger kids. They do kind of level out as they get older.

Don’t defer. Especially if he has friends also starting with him and he’s thinking he is starting this Sept.
My July baby has just left school, still not even 18! Not held him back at all, top of year.
Friendships when starting school really help. You defer him for a year and he doesn’t have his friends or even worse he seems them in the year above all together is likely to knock him back way more than him starting as a young one. He will be fine starting this year and probably happier than going back to nursery where he will probably be the oldest and feel it!
Feeling happy in his surroundings with friends will enable him to thrive and he is more likely to achieve well (although not even sure why you are thinking about that at this stage)

If you defer it just means he will miss reception, which is such an important year in terms of learning school routines, phonics, writing, making friends etc. Joining in year 1 would be far worse IMO. If he starts reception and is really struggling the school may agree to a part time table if it is too much for him, but most children cope really well, it's the parents that struggle.

I assume he's your first. You cannot comprehend how much they come on in the first year at school. It blows my mind. My daughter was fed up in the last year of nursery and has blossomed at school. I can't see what advantage deferring that experience would bring. Most of their learning is play based at this point. I was one of the younger in my year and I don't think it impacted my ability at all. I was a top setter for most things.

My daughter is a July birthday and just finishing year 1. She's top of her class for reading, and near the top for maths and handwriting. If we'd deferred her a year it would have probably hindered her learning, as she'd be working behind her abilities rather than pushed to work ahead of herself.

Socially, she's noticeably young compared to the September/October born girls, but it hasn't caused her any issues or stopped her making plenty of friends.

There are good reasons to defer a year for younger children, but it sounds like your child is ready for school and would just be bored being held back.

Uuugh, no it doesn't! Stop spreading misinformation and at least read the thread before responding.

What’s your benchmark here? Do you mean, you want him to excel in comparison to his peers, hence holding him back a year? Or do you mean you want him to excel as the best version of himself? In which case surely he will relish the challenge of starting school? I was a high achiever as a child academically and got moved up a year, so it makes no sense to me why you would hold a bright child back for a year.

Yes I'm sure in such examples people are even more inclined to do so. However, the code is clear that any parent can do it now just as in Scotland, for the simple reason that starting school at 4 is detrimental for most children per all the research.

I think he should definitely go to school especially if he's bright. I was one of the eldest in my year and it just meant I was bored. My eldest two were born in Greece and dd1 started school in Greece aged 6. She wasn't interested in reading or writing English ( I am English) so I didn't force it. We moved to England when she was 7 and went straight into year 2 unable to read and write English. Dd2 did not start school in Greece and started in year 1 aged 5 years and 4 months having never been to school and not being taught anything by me. By the Christmas they had moved her to year 2 for most of her lessons ( much to dd1's annoyance) as they were taught in key stages. Fast forward they both went to Cambridge and dd1 is a doctor and dd2 is an engineer.

I would only defer if you were to take ds out of education and encourage 'non-academic' learning. He could then slot into year one but if he is already prepared to go I think it would be upsetting not to let him go. I'm not sure he needs to be older to excel.

I absolutely wouldn’t do it based on my experience. As a child, I went to a mixed reception / Yr 1 class for a few months for the summer term as was possible when I was little. Ergo some kids were considerably older than me. I then changed schools and had to restart reception as the new school refused to put me up a year into Yr 1 (which would naturally have happened had I stayed at the former school as it was a mixed class). I was bored stiff. It completely knocked my confidence to such an extent I never recovered and became an underachiever.

I am with your husband. Also listen to the school, they know what they are doing.
And no offense meant to your son, but even if they can speak/read/write/potty train early, most, if not all children get those skills down eventually and he is likely to average out with his peers (and I say this as a "genius" primary/secondary school child - most of my friends have obtained qualifications as good as mine).
FYI my son started reception at 4y 1 month and has had a great reception year. He is challenged at school and he loves being there.
If your son is bright now he will be bored if he is deferred and that's not going to instill a love of learning.
Last note: you don't need your child to peak in early primary, Universities are unlikely to want want to ready his early years/KS1 school reports...

I was in a very similar situation and my little one is now finishing Year 1. I wish I had deferred. I feel like due to COVID, despite being bright and verbose, he doesn't have fantastic social skills. I followed the schools advice to keep him with his current year group and he is doing fine. School say they can see his potential to be outstanding but since he is so young in the year he is tracking in quite an average way. I feel like socially and academically he would have found everything easier with an extra year. Also my SIL was an August birthday and hated that she couldn't drive, drink etc until after her peers and actually this really impacted her towards the end of school. On balance, however, things will probably be fine either way!

My son was born 31 August and we had similar worries. He's actually done incredibly well academically, has always had secure friendships and been successful in sports and music too. He's a hardworker though he is very shy with new people and situations, which may partly be due to lack of confidence in relation to his older peers. Now that he's a teenager he's quite innocent compared to some of his classmates, but that's not a bad thing. I actually think this is such an individual and unpredictable situation.

No, that is out of date information. Parents can defer reception now.

I believe Scotland sits at around a 45% deferral rate for children born in Jan and Feb (which is the summer-born months for English kids), although those are stats from 2018 and it's been rising steadily for years so I wouldn't be surprised if it's over 50% now after Covid etc.

Another interesting thing from the stats is that deprived areas tend to have much fewer deferred children, and more affluent areas tend to defer more, which does back up the 'middle class' comments earlier in the thread. Looking at the areas with very low levels of deferral, they do tend to be more deprived areas.

'Figure 5 shows that the estimated rate of deferred entry to primary school increases as the area deprivation of a pupil's home postcode decreases for those born in January and February. 35% of pupils born in January and February living in SIMDquintile 1 (the 20% most deprived areas of Scotland) deferred entry to primary school, compared with 55% of those living in SIMDqunitile 5 (the 20% least deprived areas).'

Anyway not really on topic, but I find it interesting!

You know your child best. If he is meeting age related, or above expectations in his personal social emotional development as well as his communication, language, literacy development, then he is ready to start reception. The Early Years Foundation Stage curriculum takes summer born children into account, and if your son is at a good school, they will meet his individual needs because they look at each child individually and tailor the learning to that child. They still do a lot of learning through play and child initiated activities. They have sand, water, painting, crafts, outdoor classroom. Often I see summer born children who are further ahead in their development than their older peers. In a reception class there will be a range of abilities, regardless of age.

My DD is going into year 3 next year, she was born at the end of August. I considered deferring but nursery advised against it as she was bright and I'm so glad I took their advice. She is exceeding expectations in all subjects and gets some one on one time each week with a TA to do more difficult work. She also missed some of nursery and reception due to lockdowns and has been fine.

We live in the NW and almost nobody defers unless there is SEN. I'm glad that the class isn't full of children 13-16 months older than her.