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Original poster

He’s not MY Dad!!

9 replies

Northernladdette · 11/06/2023 18:04

Both my sons have their own homes, both new this year, along with a BBQ. They both earn more than we have ever earned (as do their partners) and live locally. We’re pretty laid back as parents, realising they need their own space.
My eldest has just messaged me saying he thought we’d be having a BBQ here for Father’s Day 🥴
AIBU to think it wouldn’t hurt either him or his brother to lay on a BBQ for their dad?

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RudsyFarmer · 11/06/2023 18:07

Say it to them!

HighDudgeonAtBerks · 11/06/2023 18:07

Just respond saying, “great idea. Dh would love a night of you bringing the beers and food. You know how to use our bbq, don’t you? Make sure you bring charcoal too. I’ll make sure he’s here and you make sure we have everything else!”

HighDudgeonAtBerks · 11/06/2023 18:08

Suggest they bring paper plates as you don’t want dh worrying about the washing up either.

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tribpot · 11/06/2023 18:09

Isn't this just a transitioning to adulthood thing? I would actually still typically meet up with my brother at our parents' house (and I'm 51!) but that's because it happens to be geographically in the middle. They may not want the pressure and hassle of hosting - which is not to say that you should just roll over and do it for them.

I'd just reply to say 'oh no, we've done Father's Day here for the last [x] years, why don't we do it at one of yours this year? Be nice to see the place again [etc etc]'.

PotteringAlonggotkickedoutandhadtoreregister · 11/06/2023 18:11

OR:

”me and my brother have just got our own houses. We both work full time and, although we earn good money there’s a cost of living crisis and we have stretched ourselves to get on the housing ladder.

we live locally to where we were brought up and, although we have our own homes now the family house is still, you know, home, with a special pull to it.

so, for Father’s Day we thought it would be lovely to go back to Home home, to all be together and to celebrate my dad. In the family home, as a family.

my mum has got the hump because she seems to think that now we’ve moved out we don’t get to think it would be lovely to come back to the family home for celebrations”

You Really Are Being Unreasonable

NuffSaidSam · 11/06/2023 18:11

Just message back 'I thought you or brother would want to host this year as you've got your own places now?'

Hannahsbananas · 11/06/2023 18:14

PotteringAlonggotkickedoutandhadtoreregister · 11/06/2023 18:11

OR:

”me and my brother have just got our own houses. We both work full time and, although we earn good money there’s a cost of living crisis and we have stretched ourselves to get on the housing ladder.

we live locally to where we were brought up and, although we have our own homes now the family house is still, you know, home, with a special pull to it.

so, for Father’s Day we thought it would be lovely to go back to Home home, to all be together and to celebrate my dad. In the family home, as a family.

my mum has got the hump because she seems to think that now we’ve moved out we don’t get to think it would be lovely to come back to the family home for celebrations”

You Really Are Being Unreasonable

Bollocks 😂
They’d just prefer good old Mum did the dirty work, as ever.

Original poster
Northernladdette · 12/06/2023 21:02

PotteringAlonggotkickedoutandhadtoreregister · 11/06/2023 18:11

OR:

”me and my brother have just got our own houses. We both work full time and, although we earn good money there’s a cost of living crisis and we have stretched ourselves to get on the housing ladder.

we live locally to where we were brought up and, although we have our own homes now the family house is still, you know, home, with a special pull to it.

so, for Father’s Day we thought it would be lovely to go back to Home home, to all be together and to celebrate my dad. In the family home, as a family.

my mum has got the hump because she seems to think that now we’ve moved out we don’t get to think it would be lovely to come back to the family home for celebrations”

You Really Are Being Unreasonable

This reply is hilarious, what a load of tosh 😩

OP posts:
pictoosh · 12/06/2023 21:07

@PotteringAlonggotkickedoutandhadtoreregister that's a lovely story.

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