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Original poster

I'm ill with Covid and my husband is feeding my son on our bed

65 replies

HopeG · 05/05/2023 18:03

Hi everyone,

I tested positive 3 days ago for Covid and been confined to our spare room so my husband and 5-year-old son don't catch it. We both work from home.

For the past 2 days my husband has fed my son breakfast and dinner on our bed in front of a TV or iPad. Basically as soon as my son has got home from school both days he has just watched screens until bedtime.

This evening I said to my husband I didn't feel it was appropriate that he had my son eating on the bed morning and night and he has shouted at me, told me how dare I question him and what he wants to do and that it is how he is managing the situation.

What are your thoughts? How would you handle this situation?

OP posts:
PotteringAlonggotkickedoutandhadtoreregister · 05/05/2023 18:06

Honestly? I think if I was at work all day, was doing all the stuff at home and had a 5 year old who was missing mummy and didn’t understand why he couldn’t go near her I would go for fun and exciting distraction technique too and if that means eating on the bed for 3 days then the world won’t end and the sky won’t fall. And maybe he will look back on the time when me and dad ate on the bed fondly.

Menopants · 05/05/2023 18:08

he s a massive bellend. Why is he so useless with his own son?

Sirzy · 05/05/2023 18:08

Personally I think isolating in your own home seems over the top now.

but as long as he is fed watered and happy for a few days it wouldn’t bother me at all

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Menopants · 05/05/2023 18:08

PotteringAlonggotkickedoutandhadtoreregister · 05/05/2023 18:06

Honestly? I think if I was at work all day, was doing all the stuff at home and had a 5 year old who was missing mummy and didn’t understand why he couldn’t go near her I would go for fun and exciting distraction technique too and if that means eating on the bed for 3 days then the world won’t end and the sky won’t fall. And maybe he will look back on the time when me and dad ate on the bed fondly.

Oh please!

CeliaNorth · 05/05/2023 18:20

Why is he so useless with his own son?

Is it his own son? OP says 'my son' throughout - but 'our bed' and 'our spare room'.

QuickGuide · 05/05/2023 18:22

I think you either need to leave him to it, or get up and do it yourself, preferably the former.

SoupDragon · 05/05/2023 18:22

Menopants · 05/05/2023 18:08

he s a massive bellend. Why is he so useless with his own son?

God yes. So useless he's been looking after the child for the last few days. 🙄

readbooksdrinktea · 05/05/2023 18:24

Let him get on with it. What's the actual harm for a few days?

PollyPeptide · 05/05/2023 18:26

Menopants · 05/05/2023 18:08

he s a massive bellend. Why is he so useless with his own son?

Why is he a bellend? What's wrong with eating on your bed watching telly? 😳@

GreekDogRescue · 05/05/2023 18:27

Isolating seems so OTT

DancingWithTheMoonlitKnight · 05/05/2023 18:28

It wouldn't bother me at all. I think you are being OTT isolating in a room though. Wear a mask if you must and join your family.

TomatoSandwiches · 05/05/2023 18:29

Well it's not great parenting is it, shouting at you is not on either.
I'd come back to this after you feel better and have a think about whether you want to put up with him anymore.

Jellycats4life · 05/05/2023 18:29

Is he trying to signal to you that you’re not allowed to be ill, hence making your child eat in your bedroom instead of where you usually eat?

NoSquirrels · 05/05/2023 18:30

Is he trying to WFH, hence needing to keep your DS occupied with screens after school? If so, give them a break. It’s perhaps not ideal but most I terim
childcare scenarios aren’t.

AppleKatie · 05/05/2023 18:30

I wouldn’t want a five year old eating on a bed - doesn’t feel hygienic.

A bigger issue would be the fact that I don’t want to be in a relationship with a man who feels he has the right to shout at me for ‘questioning him’.

does he normally talk to you like that?

HazyDragon · 05/05/2023 18:31

It would annoy me tbh.

But unless you are too ill, I really can't understand why you are shutting yourself away and not helping. ? You were contagious long before you had any symptoms, isolating now is pointless.

TooOldForThisNonsense · 05/05/2023 18:34

Well I wouldn’t be isolating but your husband is a lazy arse. Why isn’t he feeding him in the kitchen or dining room ffs

HowDoYouDoWhatYouDoToMeIWishIKnew · 05/05/2023 18:34

Is he still working at that time?

If he is and just stuck ds in front of a TV to make life easier while he works and does childcare then that's OK for a few days, if he isn't working then that's different.

He shouldn't be shouting though, and you probably shouldn't be telling him what he can and can't do just now when tensions are high with you being ill and him solo parenting.

CurlewKate · 05/05/2023 18:37

Don't see a problem with tea in bed-although I don't understand why he's doing it. But shouting at you is completely out of order.

3FriendsAndADog · 05/05/2023 18:38

PotteringAlonggotkickedoutandhadtoreregister · 05/05/2023 18:06

Honestly? I think if I was at work all day, was doing all the stuff at home and had a 5 year old who was missing mummy and didn’t understand why he couldn’t go near her I would go for fun and exciting distraction technique too and if that means eating on the bed for 3 days then the world won’t end and the sky won’t fall. And maybe he will look back on the time when me and dad ate on the bed fondly.

Well I’d say that if he had been as involved as the OP in looking after said child, he’d probably find it easier.
im pretty sure the OP would be giving breakfast and dinner to their child in bed of it was her DH who was Isolating!!

Nimbostratus100 · 05/05/2023 18:40

it sounds fine to me - I am eating tea in my bed right now

Goldbar · 05/05/2023 18:40

When you get better, you should start serving "family" dinner on the bed. Rather than setting the table, "set" the bed instead.

Tell him this is how you've decided to manage parenting going forward.

Oh, and stay in the spare room. He can have the lasagne covered sheets.

DangerNoodles · 05/05/2023 18:40

My DS is the same age and he would be upset and confused if I was in the same house but he couldn't visit me. It's OTT to isolate from your family and unless you are poorly with it it should be pretty much business as usual. A change of routine is to be expected if one parent is doing everything, especially if your DH still has to work after school time.

DanceMonster · 05/05/2023 18:42

Eating in bed feels like more effort to me, is he carrying the food upstairs? Surely eating downstairs is easier?

LadyKenya · 05/05/2023 18:42

He is managing the situation, let him get on with it. As other posters have asked, why are you isolating?