Which age of parenting was hardest for you?

[tulipsandteacups]

Interested to know... and why?

Oh well, in that case, I can definitely throw my hat in the ring and say it isn't universally and necessarily true - my teens are incredibly easy, and they drove me to the brink of sleep deprived madness as babies.

The positive I take away from this thread is that by and large most of you seem to enjoy ages 4-11. I’ll have to remember that and appreciate the easier ride when it arrives 👍🏻

For me the first year. Sleep deprivation is a killer and makes everything else so much more difficult. Both mine started sleeping through at 12 months so after that I found it a lot easier.
Mine both had epic tantrums as toddlers but I still found that period easier. The toddler years were more enjoyable because you could have conversations and do fun things like go to the farm or a museum. Children are so sweet and full of wonder at that age. I loved seeing the world afresh, through their eyes.
My daughter's just become a teenager so parenting seems a bit more complicated. I can sense difficult times ahead but so far it's fine.

I find this thread sooo reassuring, I'm glad it's not just me that is struggling with the teenage years. The young years are definitely more hour to hour exhausting, but the teenage years are more emotionally battering from my experience so far.

You can generally get some sort of positive reaction from young kids, even if brief. But teens .... nada. Like an emotional black hole, I am of zero interest and wrong about everything, 100% of the time.

I don't think you can compare the challenges though, it's definitely not apples to apples!

Yes! My son just felt like a bit of a fish out of water for this period of life. My daughter found it tricky, too, but found it a little easier to find new groups of friends, if necessary. But even then, it wasn't always sunshine for her. It was always better when they found lots of other activities to throw themselves into at times of friendship issues. And a major breakthrough came when they realized that the cool gang wasn't always the happiest one.

All of this!!

I have no experience past nearly 4, but my DS is just something else right now.
He still has accidents, he's really loud, he's a slave to his emotions and whether hungry, tired, overexcited, moody it's all sooooooo tedious. He can be very lovely and sweet but not very often at the moment sadly.
He's also started trying to wind us up recently which pisses me off.
I can understand though that other friends love this age because they have girls who are calm and thoughtful.

I am hoping and praying DS turns into a better and more chilled out bigger kid!

@arethereanyleftatall is spot on.

Teenage years without a doubt .

My Ds has adhd so sleep is not his thing but teenage years almost broke me . I certainly ended up on medication because of them x

This did make me laugh, getting up with young children is nothing compared with teen problems. However the person that said an easy teen is easier than even an easy baby/toddler is spot on

The difference is that a difficult teen is far harder than a difficult baby or toddler.
And an easy teen is easier than an easy baby or toddler.

Yes, almost certainly! My teens are pretty easy, but I've taught a lot of teens whose parents were no doubt at their wits' end with them.

On threads where the OP is considering a 3rd/4th/5th child and all the children they have are pre school aged I think it is fair to remind them that teenagers are a completely different kettle of fish to toddlers.

I'll finish this by saying that teenagers are expensive

Absolutely agree @RampantIvy

People should be warned before they have dc. Not keep quiet about how hard it is.

I always think on the 'should I have a baby at 45 threads' the question to be considered should instead be 'do I want a 15 year old at 60' rather. And it's a resounding, no.

So true @RampantIvy. For one thing, the amount of bread/milk/cereal 15 year-old boys (and many girls too I’m sure) can get through is eye-watering.

0-35

Did a long post then realised my ds is a bloody pain in the ass..his sister has had her moments but Ds likes to sideline me with monotonous frequency. So for me not an age a child 😂

Finding 16 horrendous, every year has got harder so far

Yes absolutely, 4-11 is a lovely age, obviously they still have little ups and downs but a lot of joy too. I wish I could do that age with my older children again and make the most of it (and feel so glad for the time I took to enjoy that stage with them. Just wish I’d taken even more time out to be have slowed down to really
make the most of that stage with them and had more perspective) The 18+ age is really nice too.

Yes 4-11 are wonderful. All the magic and less of the communication /development issues. 20+ is pretty fab too.

I think of that age as being the golden days of parenthood, the primary years are (ime) the most enjoyable stage of parenting.

My 2 have been genuinely nice kids. No major problems with either of them. Every age has its challenges though. Both at uni now, and I can honestly say that from 17 onwards have been the hardest. It has been an emotional rollercoaster - they are adults, but still need so much guidance and support, but don't want to ask for it, and then you are meant to help them pick up the pieces. Major life choices - A levels, uni courses, job applications. Then the big changes in their lives - moving away from home etc. Relationship issues and break ups. You are on the periphery, but have no real ability to get involved. It is truly horrible and emotionally draining.