Which age of parenting was hardest for you?

[tulipsandteacups]

Interested to know... and why?

I don't think your are an outlier. There's quite a few of us saying later teens, and a number who are saying younger haven't got to that age yet!

For me it's the neediness of them being young. Surely when they're teens you can leave them to get up in the morning alone?

Saying that, I'm not looking forward to problems of a more emotional nature, plus them being able to go out alone and me not know where they are.

You can 100% leave teens to get up in the morning alone. Its what they get up to after they've got up you have to worry about.

toddler years with both DS's without a doubt.

They are now 14 and 18 and the teen years have so far been great. I hope that continues 🙏

Worry about, yes. Harder than up at 5 on a pitch black winter morning sorting a tantrum? Not sure. I can see there’s an argument for emotionally more taxing but in terms of the actual WORK I think toddlers have to win this rather horrid competition!

@wensleywhale My DD2 had a MH breakdown age 15.5 at the start of covid. I have only just got her back out of my bed. She still can't be left overnight alone.

That sounds really stressful. It probably isn’t unheard of but it’s also fair to say it probably isn’t typical of most teens. I hope she starts to feel better soon, though.

Year 8 to Year 11.

Hormones swirling and friendship groups being trickier to navigate.

This ^^ was how it was for DD. It was the fickleness of friendships and bullying that was the issue, not DD herself.

By far the tween & earlier teenage years. (I've had 4)

The difference is that a difficult teen is far harder than a difficult baby or toddler.
And an easy teen is easier than an easy baby or toddler.

All babies and toddlers are hard, though. I have an ‘easy’ baby; she’s still a lot of work because she is a baby!

I'm not sure how this thread started to look like a game of difficulty top-trumps when the thread question was which stage each poster found hardest?

The difference as well which makes hard teens so much harder is how much more important it is.

A tantrumming toddler - behaving at their worst might be drawing on the walls and you can pick them up, put them in their cot, shut the door.

The hardest teen will be taking drugs, getting pregnant, self harming, getting bullied, being the bully, shop lifting etc

I found baby hard first time around, all so new, but I am definitely finding teenage stage far and away the hardest. In particular 15-17.
Letting them make all those stupid mistakes is the hardest thing I have ever had to do.

True, I just feel it’s a bit off to tell parents struggling with toddlers that it WILL get worse. I’m sympathetic to anyone going through a hard time but it does come across a bit ‘just you wait’ with a smidge of schadenfreude.

DS worse tantrum is definitely not scribbling on the walls! 😂

For me it's the neediness of them being young. Surely when they're teens you can leave them to get up in the morning alone?

You get more time to yourself but you spend that time worrying about your teens! (In my experience anyway).

Babies/young children are more physically relentless as they cannot be left alone. But for me the hardest part of pare ting has been having unhappy children and not being able to help them. My teen doesn't seem to have got the message that she should be shunning my company - I am her safe person so she constantly seems to be hanging around.....

I have toddler who is 3 years old, and baby who just completed 12 weeks!! Following with interest to know when it gets easier!!😅

But then what's the point of the thread, if no one is allowed to write anything other than babies, if someone has said 'I'm finding my new born hard.' ?

I think every age that has already past! Mine have got easier the older they’ve got. At the time I didn’t think they were hard work but looking back my life is easier now than it has ever been. They’re 10 and 12 so I’m bracing myself for the teenage years. So far so good though with the 12 year old.

That’s not what I’m saying 😂

There is a difference - massive difference - between ‘I’m finding my teen so hard, much harder than when he was a baby’ and ‘Teens are worse than babies. Just you wait! Anyone who is saying otherwise hasn’t had teens yet!’

Ok. So take his worst tantrum, whatever that is, and apply it to a strong 10 stone bloke rather than a 2 stone toddler.

Sure and if the 10 stone man was hitting me I’d totally agree but the point is that most teenage boys don’t hit their parents, although if you’re going through that I am sorry, it must be awful, while most toddlers do tantrum and lashing out is also normal (though horrible.)

So as per above - one persons personal horror story doesn’t mean all teens are awful.

Rude and dismissive teen girls, 14 plus. Emotionally draining and a thankless task.
Occasional glimmers remind me of the sweet youngsters they were and the lovely adults they'll no doubt become.
A rollercoaster for sure...
Love 'em