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Would you let MIL bring new boyfriend when babysitting?

90 replies

bonkersconkers101 · 06/02/2023 19:40

I'll keep this short. My MIL has offered to babysit our four month old next week while we celebrate our wedding anniversary over dinner for a couple of hours. The baby will be asleep the entire time.

She's asked if she can bring her new boyfriend. She met him LAST WEEK ... I know nothing about him except his first name. I've not met him but caught a glimpse of him. He looks nice enough but I don't know him at all.

I don't think I feel comfortable having a strange man in my house with my newborn. I'm sure he's lovely but for all I know he could be casing the joint for stuff to steal or worse.

What would you do?

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
quietnightmare · 06/02/2023 19:56

Met last week it's a no
Met 6 months ago and you've met him then yes

tribpot · 06/02/2023 19:56

Not a chance.

AnyFucker · 06/02/2023 19:57

Nay and thrice nay

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ItsRainingCatsAndDogsAgain · 06/02/2023 19:57

A very firm no from me - speaking as a parent - and a frank conversation with MIL about exactly why it is not appropriate. Yes, he is probably very nice, but I would not take the risk he is not. Trust takes a long time to build up and only seconds to lose.

piglet81 · 06/02/2023 19:59

Absolutely not.

Eastereggsboxedupready · 06/02/2023 20:00

Your mil is nuts.

HallieHufflepuff · 06/02/2023 20:00

Nope

Eastereggsboxedupready · 06/02/2023 20:00

I would be interested to know who's idea it was he tag along.

DisforDarkChocolate · 06/02/2023 20:02

No, it's not the me not knowing him it's the fact that she doesn't know him either.

ChristmasKoala · 06/02/2023 20:03

Not a chance! Out of interest who's idea was it for him to come - mil's or his?

OnTheBoardwalk · 06/02/2023 20:04

A week! Hell no. I wouldn’t have someone in my own house that I only met a week ago

meloonhead · 06/02/2023 20:05

No.

She can spend time with her granddaughter and call her boyfriend on the phone if they want to chat.

One week is a bit crazy.

Riri24 · 06/02/2023 20:06

No, I wouldnt be comfortable. I would get DH to speak to his mum and say that you'd prefer not as you don't know him/ have never met him. I don't think you need to say much more than that, and maybe your DH can suggest that you all meet up at some point soon to get to know her new boyfriend etc

IheardYouButDontWantToAnswer · 06/02/2023 20:07

No, she should not be taking him to your place. She met him last week? Bloody hell, she doesn't even know him herself yet

Clymene · 06/02/2023 20:08

No way. And the fact she even thinks that would be ok means I would never ask her to babysit again.

PennyRa · 06/02/2023 20:09

The only exception to no would be if he worked with children. A primary school teacher, a nanny, a paediatric doctor, someone you could normally trust with a child without knowing them personally

fuzzyelbow · 06/02/2023 20:10

I wouldn't even take a man I'd been dating for one week back to my own house!
The fact that she thinks it's reasonable to ask you if he can come along demonstrates very poor boundaries on her part.

Butwhytho · 06/02/2023 20:11

Absolutely not, and I’d be questioning her judgement moving forward… she doesn’t seem like she has much sense at all:

Emmamoo89 · 06/02/2023 20:11

Definitely not

Frezia · 06/02/2023 20:12

BevMarsh · 06/02/2023 19:52

Not sure I'd be comfortable with MIL babysitting either after this.
Fancy asking if a fella she met last week could come with her to your home to babysit your child!

Me neither. I'd make alternative arrangements if I were OP, even if MIL agrees to not having her boyfriend there. Good god.

Swimswam · 06/02/2023 20:13

No

ofwarren · 06/02/2023 20:14

Fuck that
Absolutely not

LemonJuiceFromConcentrate · 06/02/2023 20:16

No decent, intelligent man would think this was reasonable. He ought to be aware that it’s inappropriate and that it’s no reflection on him whatsoever.

So should your mil, of course. I guess now you know you can’t trust her judgement.

verdantverdure · 06/02/2023 20:16

No

Sereni5 · 06/02/2023 20:17

BevMarsh · 06/02/2023 19:52

Not sure I'd be comfortable with MIL babysitting either after this.
Fancy asking if a fella she met last week could come with her to your home to babysit your child!

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