Don't even know where to start and I've tried to talk to my own mum&boyfriend but they just don't get it.
I love my son but I just wish I didn't have to look after him I hate doing nappies , I suck at winding him , he twines all the time when he's with me , I struggle at doing the getting up with him through the night like I know and want to be so grateful to have him but I feel like he doesn't even like me, like the baby knows I'm shit.
What makes it worse is my other half is back at work next week so I'll have nobody to take over when it gets to much or just nobody to help /be there , I knew it would be hard but I really didn't think it would be like this . My parents / his help and they go on about how good he is , how he always sleeps but honestly he doesn't for me he's up every 2hours that's if he actually sleeps usually just lies down making noises spitting his dummy in and out ,then its time to get up again for next bottle 😴 when it gets to overwhelming our parents they do offer to have him but I really don't think it helps as it's another day of me not getting to grips with it all . It just takes him away it doesn't actually help me . I just feel moody , tired and just no patience at all . I don't have any friends , I just hate me as a person . I thought by now I'd get the hang of stuff but I haven't - I just feel useless .I actually think bf and my son would be better off without me as I think the baby senses I'm sad and I feel like I'm draining life out of bf which isn't fair like my mood is rubbing off on everyone I just don't know what I can do . I actually hate feeling like I'm one big whinge
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Parenting
Baby four week old and I really don't think motherhood is for me .
Lollyathome111 · 25/01/2023 13:45
MrsTerryPratchett · 25/01/2023 15:40
Having a little baby isn’t ‘really shit’!! It’s hard and exhausting and at times you can feel like you’ll never do it ‘right’ but I hate it when people say oh it’s just shit.
Women can describe their own experience any way they like. It was shit for me. Once she starting crawling it was more fun, after 2 was even better. But yes, newborn was shit. Painful, depressing, lonely and shit. It doesn't mean I don't love DD. She is the most brilliant person in the world bar none.
AspidistraFlying · 28/04/2023 23:30
Absolute shit for me too. I loathed every second, and was googling fostering and adoption services when DS was 3 weeks old. He’s now 11, and utterly lovely. Don’t beat yourself up, OP. It’s tough, tough, tough. Take all the help available. You won’t notice it happening, but very shortly you will be the expert on your baby.
MrsTerryPratchett · 25/01/2023 15:40
Having a little baby isn’t ‘really shit’!! It’s hard and exhausting and at times you can feel like you’ll never do it ‘right’ but I hate it when people say oh it’s just shit.
Women can describe their own experience any way they like. It was shit for me. Once she starting crawling it was more fun, after 2 was even better. But yes, newborn was shit. Painful, depressing, lonely and shit. It doesn't mean I don't love DD. She is the most brilliant person in the world bar none.
Lollyathome111 · 28/04/2023 23:19
Can I just say , I totally forgot I wrote this and really can't believe I ever did . He's 4 month old now and I couldn't imagine life without him , I love him so much . Wow , l I really forgot about this. I wish I could go back and tell myself while I was feeling like this that it was gonna be okay 🩷
HamFrancisco · 25/01/2023 13:51
And, don't feel bad about not enjoying it. Parenting a tiny baby is a massive slog that can come as a huge shock to the system.
It will get better.
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Lollyathome111 · 28/04/2023 23:19
Can I just say , I totally forgot I wrote this and really can't believe I ever did . He's 4 month old now and I couldn't imagine life without him , I love him so much . Wow , l I really forgot about this. I wish I could go back and tell myself while I was feeling like this that it was gonna be okay 🩷
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