3 year old will only go for a poo if mum helps

[Moonshine160]

Sorry if TMI but my 3.5 year old boy will only go for a poo at home and if I am around. He goes twice a day on average. I know this is probably quite normal but we’ve had a couple of instances now where preschool have phoned me because he’s crying with tummy ache saying he wants to go home and it’s because he needs a poo, so I’ve gone to collect him. He has a great relationship with his nanna and he goes to her house once a week but again today she’s brought him home because he’s crying that he wants mummy, he wouldn’t tell her why but it’s because he needed a poo.

I encourage him try and go to the toilet before I drop him off anywhere but sometimes he just doesn’t need to at that moment. I don’t want to make a big deal about it to him because I think it’ll worsen the issue. He can hold himself and hasn’t had any accidents but it’s obviously upsetting him.

Anyone had a similar problem and have any advice?

Can you try leaving him alone to poo at home? Put him on the toilet and then stand outside the door?

Would he poo at nursery if your their? Is it you he wants or his own toilet?

Least he wees outside the house.

Does he have an issue with the cleanliness of the toilets? One of my nephews used to have that issue and so would refuse to go to toilet. The way to get around it until he simply couldn't fit was to ensure he had his own potty with him. I've since discovered my brother, his dad, has an issue with toilets.