Newborn constantly on the breast, im struggling to cope

[fairgame84]

DD is 3 days old and she is constantly on the breast. She has a shallow latch which is improving with flipple technique. I feed her on cross cradle hold. I am re-latching most of the time when she slips back to shallow latch.
We were seen by feeding specialist midwife yesterday due to me being in pain and that's where she said the latch wasn't deep enough. There's no tongue tie, she just has a small mouth apparently.
Yesterday she was feeding 10-30 minutes in total every 1-3 hours.

Today she's feeding for 1-2 hours every 3-4 hours. As soon as she drops off she wants to go back on. I've got milk, her poos are yellow, and she is offered both breasts at each feed.

I've offered formula but she vomits it back and just wants breast. She's got no interest in a dummy.
I've tried swaddling, winding, rocking and nothing helps. She's not just rooting, she's properly crying until I she's back on the breast.

I really want to carry on breastfeeding but Im at the point where I'm thinking of giving up and bottle feeding. Im not getting any rest or sleep.

Please help.

Silicone nipple shields!!!!

I swear to God they are what got me through the hideous pain of the early days. I was worried I’d have to use them forever but as soon as I could hear it, I ditched them without issue. I use them and Kamillosan cream. The smell of my early weeks with my newborn DD1 💕

Honestly op only a 98g loss is AMAZING!!!

If it's not for you, that's fine - but look what you've done? You've kept another human being alive for three days and your baby is thriving!

One day at a time, and if that's too much one hour at a time, or even 10 minutes.

And remember, fed is best. No pressure to do anything other than nourish your baby in the the way that works for you!

To echo a PP, you’ve done amazingly well so far. Your baby has kept a lot of weight since birth weight and that’s all down to your hard work!!
highly processed seed oils go into making formula milk and they’re inflammatory. If you can manage to make breastfeeding work for you for as long as you can, you really are giving your baby the best start.

I powered on through yesterday. I gave a bottle of formula yesterday morning to give my poor nipples a rest and pumped off one side. The midwife came out and told me I shouldn't be pumping because I'll get an over supply.

So I carried on with regular painkillers, nipple cream and sheer grit and determination. Then at the 4am today I realised both of my nipples just resemble scabs. This is despite sorting out the latch problem. There was no way I could have tolerated the pain of feeding so I gave DD a bottle which she wolfed down and now I'm sat pumping.
I cannot physically feed a baby through scabs and pain. I'd rather pump and give her ebm and try feeding her again once everything is healed.
I can tolerate the pump on level 1 only and I'm just doing 15 mins each side and getting off 50ml each side so hopefully I won't get over supply.

I don't want to remember my first days with DD as scabby nipples and painful boobs 😫

Multi Mam compresses. Wet healing is the best for scabbed nipples so keep them moist.

Hey! I have a 7 week old now and I powered through those scabby nipple very painful days just like you’re doing. It’s so so hard but I promise that it gets better, so much better, i really look forward to BFing baby now like I love the connection but at your point i was DREADING each feed. And! They’ve become more spaced out (still a lot in the evening granted!) but I promise that 7 weeks somehow has flown by!! Use the nipple cream copiously (I don’t use it now which is madness to how I was feeling!) take the paracetamol, drink the pop, squash and eat alllll the biscuits to get through. You have got this!!! I never pumped I just powered through, each feed done is one painful feed you won’t have to do again.

Oh and it felt a bit better by 2 weeks MUCH better by 3 and positively enjoyable at 4-5 🙂

Do what works for you OP. If that means offering a bottle, so baby has a less crazed mother, then so be it. If you feel like you can try one more day or powering through, do that. You sound like you're doing your absolute best.

I was always told not to use shields as they can effect milk supply but when my nipples scabbed over in the early days I used them for a few days and they saved me . It’s worth looking into . Like you I occasionally gave formula just to give my bloody nipples a break .

Between that and the shields , they healed and we went on to exclusively breastfed. So keep it up , do what you have to do and I promise you it does get better !!

Keep playing around with positions to get the best latch . I remember the football clutch (or rugby clutch , can’t remember now) worked best to get a deep latch in the early days. I used the flipple technique too.

As soon as they feel better I'll put her back on. I want to do what's best for her but I have to look after myself as well. I had terrible PND after DS and i don't want to risk going back there.
At the minute I feel like this this is the best I can do for us both.

@AllThatAndMore I was also told not to use shields but I can't remember the reason why.
Whenever somebody assesses a feed they say her latch is perfect now but she's a little rascal for slipping so then I have to re-latch which she hates. She's worse on one side for slipping. We're still doing cross cradle because it's easier for me to control her head to re-latch and reposition her when she starts slipping.

So incredibly tough. This is the hardest stage.
Your midwife is right to warn about pumping and oversupply. Just be careful on this as the last thing you want is mastitis. Make sure you're aware of the signs. It's so easy to get in the first few weeks.
It will get easier soon.

feeding whilst lying on your side in bed will allow you to rest You can also doze in a safe position whilst the baby sleeps Put your arm above the head of your baby to stop you rolling onto her

OP the initial stages of BF are so tough and both times I wanted to give up in early stages. DC1 just puked up every single time I tried a bottle but kept down breast milk and DC2 just wouldn’t even try a bottle.
By the time I finished BF both children I was sad it was finishing.
Try side lying so you can get some rest whilst feeding. Rest makes a huge difference.

I know next to nothing but I’d ignore the midwife on pumping. If you’re pumping as you’ve dropped feeds you’re maintaining supply. In any case every midwife I’ve seen has said a bit of pumping alongside is great. They all have their different opinions.

Lasinoh cream and nipple shields for a few days!! you need to help your nipples recover but you need to make sure baby is on the breast a couple of times at least a day as well as pumping babies are better at draining the milk than a pump.i had the same due to poor latch, and only took 2 or 3 days of nipple shields and lasinoh to heal them

This is good advice. And also please get yourself some Multi Mam compresses - they are amazing. With my first I used Lasinoh cream for weeks, plus multi mam compresses. And they really helped.

one thing to keep in mind if you do want to breastfeed is that if you don’t offer her the breast for a few days, she might get used to the bottles and find it hard to go back to breastfeeding - which is more work for the baby than bottle feeding.

I'll nip to Sainsbury's in a bit as they do medela nipple shields and I'll see if I can get her back on this afternoon.

I was about to recommend nipple shields. This happened to me (bleeding scabs and so much pain!) and nipple shields worked great while they healed. They kept me breastfeeding when I might have given up because of the pain otherwise.

I used them for a couple of weeks and then DC had grown and latch was better and I didn’t need them anymore. Went on to breastfeed for 18 months!! Longer than I expected or planned!

Has anyone qualified looked for tongue tie? But aside from that this can be very tough at the start and please know you are doing brilliantly. My first was like yours. He ended up being diagnosed with tongue tie at 6 months but actually we had managed to figure it out together before then. I think managing your expectations helps. So make yourself a little cosy nest, with a flask of tea and a water bottle beside you, one handed eating snacks to hand and watch the telly, read a book on your phone etc. and know that you are doing very important parenting. If you can look into safe co sleeping and learn to feed lying down this will help a lot. If you're not sleeping the next best thing is lying down on a bed with your eyes closed. You don't need to get our for walks, you don't need to get dressed, you don't need to have visitors (unless they're cooking you food and bringing it to you to eat from the couch). It is such early days and sitting and feeding is all you need to do right now.

@WithFlamingLocksOfAuburnHair
Yes a paediatrician had a look when she had her NIPE done and the infant feeding specialist looked the day after. Both said no tongue tie. The feeding specialist said she's got a small mouth and a short tongue.

Ah, so it may just take more effort for her to feed and so she's not an efficient feeder. She will grow though so it won't be like this forever, even though it's very tough now.

@WithFlamingLocksOfAuburnHair
Yes I'm hoping it will be easier as she grows. I just need to get through this bit.

I was also told not to use shields but I can't remember the reason why.

They can hinder milk transfer for some, and in turn this would decrease your supply and mean the baby is not getting enough. On the other hand they can cause no problems at all for some and can save a breastfeeding journey.

Whenever somebody assesses a feed they say her latch is perfect now but she's a little rascal for slipping so then I have to re-latch which she hates.

If someone tells you a latch 'looks good' ignore them. The only thing that matters is how it feels, and if you have scabbed nipples this would suggest the latch needs tweaking. Laid back position is especially useful for a deeper latch. Skin to skin will also encourage baby's deep latching instincts. The gravity in this position can help with the slipping off.

Yes a paediatrician had a look when she had her NIPE done and the infant feeding specialist looked the day after. Both said no tongue tie. The feeding specialist said she's got a small mouth and a short tongue.

Don't afraid to keep pushing for different specialists to check - sometimes posterior tongue tie can be missed by many practitioners until it is spotted. The slipping off you talk about is a very common sign of tongue tie.

She's worse on one side for slipping. We're still doing cross cradle because it's easier for me to control her head to re-latch and reposition her when she starts slipping.

Have you tried rugby hold? This is especially useful when baby is worse on one side - as when you switch boobs the baby stays on the same side. E.g cross cradle on left, move to rugby on right the baby stays on their right side for both breasts.

Are you able to get to a local group for face to face support? Also, the National Breastfeeding Helpline is fantastic. You sound like a bloody champion, hang in there, those early days can be brutal.

Oh lovely I know exactly how you feel. I had no nipple or latch problems but had an oversupply and basically pure exhaustion.

I exclusively breastfed for a month and it ruined my first few weeks of the newborn phase.

It became an OBSESSION. If I wasn’t breastfeeding I was on forums and Google about breastfeeding. It actually gave me baby blues.

The minute I gave up breastfeeding and went to formula my entire experience of having a baby changed and I loved every second. My only regret is not quitting sooner and allowing myself to feel like I couldn’t stop for some weird guilt. I was also in hospital 2 weeks before having my baby so was soo exhausted I thought I would die. Literally. Sounds dramatic I know.

what was worst for me was on forums such as mumsnet and Facebook groups everyone just said it’s normal so I thought well if this experience is normal than basically I must not like having a baby as I was so tired I felt I couldn’t go on.
not one person said ‘it’s driving you crazy, just give her a bottle of formula and go to sleep’
That would have saved me so much mum guilt and grief.

My next baby I will be fully equipped with that’s to come and will combination feed.

This is not to knock ebf at all. I think BF can be fantastic and I salute mothers who do it. It’s not easy and they do deserve medals!
however it is not worth making yourself I’ll for or ruining your special newborn baby bubble for like I did. You’ll never get this time back so please do enjoy it no matter what you decide xx