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Dog at school and child with phobia

118 replies

LittleMissMe99 · 29/09/2022 19:50

In my daughters school they have a wellbeing area where all children can go. If they're upset, lonely, just want a chat etc. Really lovely idea I think and works very well. My daughter who is 11 (just started secondary school) won't go because they have a dog and she is terrified of them. Full blown phobia There have been occasions when she has been alone at lunch time and wanted to go there (where there are other kids in a similar situation). But she's too scared. She's a very shy and anxious child and will not tell them shes afraid of dogs. I'm wondering should I mention it to the school? They won't get rid of the dog because of one student will they? What would you do?

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Takingturnstogether · 29/09/2022 19:52

I don't think I'd do anything about the dog in school. Maybe try to get help for my child's phobia? I am aware that this is easier said than done!

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smileyplant · 29/09/2022 19:52

I would be looking at ways to help her tackle her phobia of.dogs. my cousin is terrified of dogs as an adult and its very distressing for him when he comes across them in public, going to the park, round friends houses etc. He wishes he'd tackled it when younger.

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mcdog · 29/09/2022 19:53

This is tricky, what would you like to happen if you do contact the school?

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Dotcheck · 29/09/2022 19:53

Ask the school if there are times the dog isn’t there.
However, this may be a great start to working on her issues with dogs

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Newuser82 · 29/09/2022 19:53

I would mention it to the school yes. I would be very surprised if they got rid of the dog but I'm sure they will be able to support your daughter with the issue.

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Lookingforrecommendations · 29/09/2022 19:55

My children both had severe dog phobias. I got a puppy. They both adore dogs now
I'd be working on that phobia as there are dogs everywhere nowadays.
A dog can be a wonderful stress reliever to children, but I do appreciate how difficult it is when your child is utterly terrified

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Ponderingwindow · 29/09/2022 19:56

you should tell the school. They aren’t going to remove the dog because of her phobia. They might offer her other support which would be a very good thing.

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GrimmTales · 29/09/2022 19:57

Definitely mention it. I think they will be able to arrange some dog-free areas or times.

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mantequilla · 29/09/2022 20:00

Are you able to help her with her phobia? Buy some books, some self CBT books for children?

The answer is to help your DD manage her phobia, not suggest that they get rid of the dog that the majority of the kids probably really enjoy.

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chineapplepunks · 29/09/2022 20:01

They won't get rid of the dog but maybe they could put other things in place? Definitely would recommend help for the phobia though! I used to have panic attacks around dogs, had exposure therapy and now I have 3 of the little buggers!

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AlwaysGinPlease · 29/09/2022 20:07

Would you want them to to get rid of the dog? If so that's incredibly unreasonable. Your daughters phobia doesn't trump the rights of all the non dog phobic children. If anything you need to take her to see someone about it because her life is going to be very difficult if this phobia isn't treated.

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Muddledandbefuddled · 29/09/2022 20:12

I'd definitely get on top of the dog phobia as it will be massively debilitating as she gets older. Eg where I live she couldn't go out for lunch or grab a coffee as everywhere is dog friendly, trains often have dogs on them, my office has an employee with an assistance dog etc.

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MissDollyMix · 29/09/2022 20:15

Please help her with her phobia. I have a lifelong phobia of another animal (not dog or anything obvious like spiders) but it absolutely controls and spoils my life. I wish I had been able to get on top of it as a child.

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FavouriteDogMug · 29/09/2022 20:16

If they have gone to the trouble of having a wellbeing area then I am sure they would want to put something in place for your daughter if they knew about her phobia. I'm pretty sure they would have some kind of plan for that as quite a few students either wouldn't like dogs or might have allergies, so this has probably been considered when getting a dog.

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Duchessofmuchness · 29/09/2022 20:20

Definitely mention to school. If their intention is to help students with their well ing, they need to consider students with dog phobia, those with allergies etc.

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whorebornin94 · 29/09/2022 20:22

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

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TwoWrightFeet · 29/09/2022 20:24

Have you got your daughter any support for dealing with her phobia?

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TwoWrightFeet · 29/09/2022 20:25

MissDollyMix · 29/09/2022 20:15

Please help her with her phobia. I have a lifelong phobia of another animal (not dog or anything obvious like spiders) but it absolutely controls and spoils my life. I wish I had been able to get on top of it as a child.

Why not get help now?

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MissDollyMix · 29/09/2022 20:27

TwoWrightFeet · 29/09/2022 20:25

Why not get help now?

I’d honestly love to but I’ve no idea where to start!

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EskSmith · 29/09/2022 20:38

To those saying get on top of the dog phobia:
A: If it were that easy the op would be doing that already.
B. Even if she were to start the process now it will tak (quite literally) years,should she be unsupported until then?

Op, I suggest you speak to the pastoral team and let them know the issue, they may well have a solution to help your daughter and should certainly be considering those who just don't like dogs as well as those who are afraid of them.

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Dotcheck · 29/09/2022 22:49

EskSmith · 29/09/2022 20:38

To those saying get on top of the dog phobia:
A: If it were that easy the op would be doing that already.
B. Even if she were to start the process now it will tak (quite literally) years,should she be unsupported until then?

Op, I suggest you speak to the pastoral team and let them know the issue, they may well have a solution to help your daughter and should certainly be considering those who just don't like dogs as well as those who are afraid of them.

Phobias don’t have to take years to sort. Hypnotherapy can be quicker

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Kumri · 29/09/2022 23:34

Dogs are banned from all the schools round here, including playground areas, out of consideration for children who are (quite rationally!) scared of them.

I would explain the situation to the school and say obviously this is a problem, what are you going to do about it? The obvious solution seems to me that the dog should be in the head’s office or somewhere else away from children.

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Kumri · 29/09/2022 23:35

Dotcheck · 29/09/2022 22:49

Phobias don’t have to take years to sort. Hypnotherapy can be quicker

Why should OP’s child have to be hypnotised to accomodate a teacher’s desire to have their pet at work? It’s totally inappropriate.

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MolliciousIntent · 30/09/2022 09:52

Kumri · 29/09/2022 23:35

Why should OP’s child have to be hypnotised to accomodate a teacher’s desire to have their pet at work? It’s totally inappropriate.

Where did you get that it's a teacher's pet? It sounds like it's a therapy animal in the wellbeing area.

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BeeDavis · 30/09/2022 13:46

You need to take responsibility for your daughter’s phobia, like hell should they get rid of the dog. Did you not consider that this is a perfect opportunity for her to start to deal with her phobia? Dogs can be a lovely companion for a child.

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