9 month old not standing, no words

[NewMomma21]

Hi everyone,

Posting in the hope I’ll get some reassurance.

I have a 9 month old. I thought he was reaching milestones but recently I’ve become a bit worried. I am in a parenting group with other 9 month old and he seems to be the only baby who is not pulling up to stand. He will stand briefly with some support from furniture but mostly drops to the floor.

Although he is vocal he also seems to be the only baby in the group who is not saying dada and mama. Other babies have up to 8 words and we don’t even have dada.

He has commando crawled since about 8 months and has been sitting since about 5.5 months but now I feel he has stalled completely compared to other babies.

I know comparison is the thief of joy but I’m really starting to worry that he is not progressing.

Has anyone any experience of similar? Thanks

*The first rule of parenting is to ignore stuff like this. Once you’re done ignoring the walking and talking milestones, you’ll be better equipped to ignore when your friend’s kids learned their colours, could write their name and use the potty. After that comes ignoring whose kids can dress themselves first, leading up to what book band everyone’s kid is on, all the way through who’s entering for selective schools, who’s on the sports team and what grade other people’s children are in music. Finally, you get to ignore other people’s children’s exam results and university entrance.

Start ignoring now and you remove one area of stress from your life.*

This is the best advice from @Zib There was a mum in DD1's reception class who broadcast loudly and frequently that her DD was on the gifted and talented list for reading and was reading a wide variety of chapter books. This was when DD was recognising about five words. 😁When they did their GCSEs (and I am temporarily ignoring @Zib 's advice here) DD and gifted child got exactly the same grade ... They're all different and society needs people with different skills and talents. And the age a baby first sat / rolled/ stood/ spoke at has limited influence on their life in the long term.

My nearly 10months DD isn't crawling or pulling herself up yet either but I'm not worried. She only really started rolling on her tummy at about 8.5months - she hated tummy time prior to this, then one day she just suddenly did it and now she can cover a large area doing roly poly's🤣 she can lift her head and straighten her arms, she can also lift her bum, but can't coordinate the 2 to crawl. She bum shuffles a little. I really believe she will just suddenly do these things when she's ready. In fact I think she's a bit lazy haha, if I put a favourite toy on the play mat to encourage her to try and move to get it she just scrunches and pulls in the mat to move the toy closer 🤣🤣🤣 she can pull herself up a little bit on her knees in her next to me cot from a sitting position (cot is rapidly being put up) . Babies develop at all different rates, please try not to worry too much at this age xxx

Not even read your full post but honestly don't worry.

I went to baby sensory classes and was always comparing his progress against others. They're all different and will all develop at different rates.
My DS is 17m he didn't start pulling up to stand until 12-13m and didn't take first steps until 15m
He's running round like a lunatic now.
Speed still slow too. He says 'Doooooahhh' for Dog and that's about it apart from babababa and gagagaga
He's happy, I'm happy and that's all that matters.

They come on at their own pace OP, don't worry xxx

Speech*

@NewMomma21 hows your little one coming on now?

He is absolutely amazing! He was slow to talk (2 before anything meaningful) but now is an absolute dictionary and a little boy who brings us so so much joy. If you are in a similar situation please do not worry, they will will reveal themselves in time and it will be worth the wait. I wish I could go back and show myself my amazing little boy

Sorry I commented on an old post, glad they're doing well

My DD is 16m, pulled to standing and said “hello” at 10m, neither with any real consistency for several months, she still isn’t walking now but she likes to impress us with her standing. Her words came mainly in last 1-2m, this stuff happens in fits and starts. Your DS sounds perfectly normal, if there are any issues, they will be picked up at the 12m check. Try to avoid getting dragged into those discussions if you can, I always found them boring and therefore easy to ignore 🤣

ha just seen this is a really old post, glad to see all is good 😊

I would not be worried at ALL. 9 month olds dont have words, they babble. Usually with mama dada baba but they are just sounds not actually saying mummy daddy baby. Also some/most babies arent even crawling by 9 months so you can't expect them to be pulling up really.

Just keep making these sounds to your baby even though it sounds like total garbage it's important to practice these sounds with them. I babble to my daughter everywhere, people probably think im crazy😂.

my 7 month old says "hiya" but it doesnt mean shes saying "Hello".

hahah don’t listen to the parent competition groups!

My ds was pretty fast with walking and talking, but even I’m laughing at the idea of a whole group 9 month olds having a few words each. It’s bull.

There’s a big jump between 9mo - 12 mo. Your baby sounds to be developing beautifully from what you’ve mentioned. It doesn’t matter if he’s only pulling to stand for a few seconds, he’s doing it and he will make progress.

I remember being worried as my ds didn’t crawl/move anywhere beside rolling until nearly 9 months- but then he started walking at 9.5 months!

Hi @NewMomma21 I love hearing such positive outcomes, I feel like everyday is so tough atm, it’s just the lack of babbling that gets me down😭

Hi there. I’m right there with you with my second baby who is 9 month old who has yet to master any skills except crying in a myriad of ways! One thing I have learned from DS one is that it all evens out, the ones who stood earlier or had words are now the same as my DS who did everything “late”! My 9 month old is in fact more behind, he is resolute in his refusal to crawl, he does babble but nothing meaningful and he is mostly a cranky baby who likes to cry. But I know the light at the end of the tunnel is there and I need to be kind myself and him and we will get there in the end. My first DS is an absolutely fabulous toddle, the joy of my life and all the worry is a distant memory including all the talk of referrals to speech therapy that my HV suggested he might need intervention at 11 months old!

@NewMomma21

So my son is going to be 10 months on the 13th he was born 3 weeks early, he sits well unsupported and will reach for toys but HATES being on his tummy, he just pulls himself back into sitting, has just learnt how to crawl and can pull to stand with ease, struggles to sit back down though, just stays standing until we get him back down.

he is not babbling like the other babies, makes occasional noises and screams but no babbles Ma, baba or dada.

His eye contact is okay ish, doesn’t copy us or clap, wave or point. EVERYTHING goes straight into his mouth, wants to lick and bite everything.

Sleeps and eats well, I feed him I can’t deal with the BLW mess🙈

He will bang his hand on table if I do it, and can bang two objects together.

I feel like a terrible mother and im at the very end of the rope. We read together, sing, babble, all day long.

when I make the mama movement with my mouth with no sound he copies that movement with his mouth but no sounds if that makes sense.

Smiles when he sees me/husband or other family members, can lift arms to be picked up and will use me to pull to stand up.

I find he twirls his arms/feet occasionally and kicks legs really fast when lying down, and stares at the door handles and lamp in my room.

I am at the end of my tether, HV seems to think I have health anxiety.

He has no separation anxiety and I feel he stares into blank spaces at times.

will smile if I say smile, and looks at where I point at times, 70% will look when I call his name, if he isn’t engrossed in something.

Will watch me do the actions to heads shoulders, knees and toes but can’t mimic any songs or actions.

my main concern is lack of babbling and the no gestures!

Sorry for the long post!

Oh my goodness do not feel like a terrible parent! You are doing an amazing job and your baby sounds like they are flourishing in such an enriched environment! Take it from me you are doing everything right, everything! It sounds like you need to be kinder to yourself and remind yourself every day how amazing you are doing.
My DS sounds exactly the same as yours, lots of happy hands and interest in the most peculiar of objects and lots of mouth exploration, that’s just babies though I’m not at all worried! I really wouldn’t be concerned by anything you’ve said. My son has no gestures but they will come in time. Right now the focus for me is on modelling communication rather than expecting it. The gestures will come in time. Honestly it really sounds you are a fantastic mother and your child is perfectly on track!

its just so hard when other friends have babies younger or similar age and can do everything my little one can’t😩 just so hard to not compare, he also has zero teeth too🙈 I just pray and pray he picks up on the babbling/gestures soon before I drive myself mad 🙈

@Mumof3bb1 - hey 👋 don’t suppose you have any update do you pls? You’re describing my LO, but with a few extra concerns on the list. Looking for some hope ✨

9 months! If you’d have said 19 months I might be a teeny bit worried but not at 9 months. Honestly don’t worry and enjoy this time.