Feel I have been a proper nag to my dd and now feel guilty

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She wasn't very excited about going pony riding this afternoon and I really went on and on and on about how she didn't appreciate it, she wasn't keen, how much work I had put in to organise it, how I would have loved to go at her age and so on and so on. Feel a right cow now as I know I lost it a bit - I suppose I was worried she doesnt really enjoy it after I've spent a long time trying to get her on the waiting list for lessons. She says she is keen. I also said she was lazy because she spent the mornging laying on the sofa watching tv. . She is 9.

dont know why I have posted this, I suppose to see how I should have gone about encouraging her to go.

oh the tricky dilemas of the MIddle Classes

Well thats just it, its a cheap place, the only cheap place round here (suppose thats why theres a waiting list), we cannot afford the more expensive places.

Still I know it wasn't drugs or antying serious like that

Is this an activity she wanted to do? Would understand if you had put time and effort into something and she then lost interest - on the plus side if it isn't for her you won't be paying out each week? Sure she will love it once she has been there and made some chums

Yes she really wanted to do it! Wanted jodphurs for xmas and everything! Trouble is I know she wont say if she doesnt really like it, will just moan about going until I get fed up and cancel it

Does she get pocket money? Maybe she could make a small contribution to the activity then if it isn't for her she maybe more inclind to let you know, Think once she has got into it she will be ok

Maybe she was nervous? I adored horseriding as a kid but was always incredibly nervous before each lesson - really bad butterflies in tum - and this lasted until I was well into my teens. But I wouldn't have stopped for the world.

Lots to be nervous about: will she get the shitty pony that bucks and bites, will they have to trot without stirrups (agony for the unfit/unused to it), will they have to do anything new, will she fall off (ever been winded?! It's pretty scary!), will her pony bolt, will she get the one that just won't go and makes her look rubbish, will the instructor shout at her (there are lots of scary riding instructors out there!).

Just a few things that might have been on her mind. Hope that helps give another perspective, and perhaps something to talk about with her. Lucky girl who has a mum who cares enough to get her riding lessons.

Another thought - is she a reader? There are lots of pony-based books which I was madly keen on at her age, and worked my way through the local library's entire stock, got them to order in etc. The Jill books by Ruby Ferguson (terribly 1950s or thereabouts but I loved them all the same), the Jinny books by Patricia Leitch, and all sorts of others that don't spring to mind. Might help to keep her interested, and reading instead of watching telly .