There are 4 of us who see each other on the school run each morning, our children are all in the same class and we tend to have general chit chat at drop-off and pick-up times.
Our children are 8 so we’ve known each other for about 4 years and over those
years we’ve done many days out together with the children, but also many nights out with just us as adults.
The hard thing is that one of the mums is near unbearable. She is so boastful, always bragging about what she has, the holidays she takes, the home refurbishments she’s doing, her car, her clothes, her jewellery etc. And no matter what conversation is being had she always manages to bring it back to herself and she has to out-do everyone. It’s so draining.
What she boasts most about though is her daughter who can do absolutely nothing wrong in her mum’s eyes. The mum is always bragging about her daughter’s school achievements, her daughter’s after-school activities, the medals and certificates she won, her daughter’s appearance, what she buys for her daughter etc and she will constantly put other children down (in a variety of subtle ways) to make her daughter seem better than everyone else. It’s really, really unpleasant.
She also loves to pass negative comments about the homes of other parents (if her child has been there) and she’s just so judgemental of how other people live if they don’t have the same £20k conservatory that she has. She has even stopped her daughter going to houses if she doesn’t approve of something, even if it’s as petty as some of the wallpaper coming away from the wall. She purposefully asks the parents of these children if she can use their bathroom so she can go and look upstairs.
Her daughter is incredibly spoilt and I know she’s only 8 but she’s quite unpleasant to be around. She constantly interrupts, pushes other children around, takes things from other children, is always showing off about herself etc and always has to be the best at everything.
The whole thing is so draining and it has gotten so, so much worse over the last year to the point that the other three of us are just done with it. We can’t cope with it anymore. We’ve been tolerating it for sake of the children’s friendships but I’m not sure that’s enough of a motivation anymore.
It is my birthday next week and I want us three (me and the two nice mums) to go out for a meal but I don’t know how to go about it without offending the other mum.
I just really, really don’t want her there because she will ruin the entire evening.
The mum has already been making comments about my birthday and asking how are we all going to celebrate it together and coming up with ideas etc and I feel like dying inside.
I just don’t want her to be part of it.
How do I manage this situation?
My husband thinks I should just be honest with her and tell her that I simply don’t enjoy her company and explain why.
I can’t do that though can I?
Has anyone else been in a similar situation and dealt with it in a manner that nobody gets hurt?