Tell me you're a tired parent without telling me you're a tired parent

[babysleephelp]

Copied from a Facebook post I saw but the responses were funny so thought I'd ask here!

Today I played "sleeping bunnies" multiple times just for a 10 second rest on the floor where I could close my eyes

fallen asleep at work on more than one occasion. I am a teacher....

I dream of having a small accident/illness which requires 1 or 2 nights in hospital just to have a night away from my 3 dc, Dh and dog...... nothing too serious.

Tried to open my front door by pointing my car keys at it and clicking furiously…😴

The postman delivered a parcel shortly after dc3 was born. He handed me his machine and asked me to sign my name on it. I paused. He repeated ‘please can you sign your name…’. I replied, ‘I will, when I remember it!’

I opened the back gate without putting the dogs on their leads the other day.
Ensue the sound of excited barking and paws scurrying across the flags and I just assumed they were chasing a bird out of the garden, until it twigged I'd just given them the freedom they've always longed for to leg it down our (busy, main, 40mph) road to the farmers field (where I definitely wasn't taking them as it's like a mud bath).
Luckily (or unluckily) they had bumped in to their arch enemies and were trying to start a fight not too far down the road so I managed to get them back safely. Arch enemies owner was less than impressed.
Got them back to the garden and realised I'd left the baby in her pram on her own while all this was happening 😱
It was SO unlike me as one of my dogs is really quite naughty and I am normally so vigilant, I was really upset with myself.
Still don't know what I was (or wasn't) thinking and can only put it down to tiredness as DD has been waking up at 2am for a party the last few weeks 😭

I had a dental check up and a hygienist appt yesterday, and I never thought I would say this, but it was lovely being able to lie back peacefully whilst the hygienist was scrapping my teeth ! I didn’t have to talk to anyone.
I’ve had the same thoughts when having fillings before too.

Wishing that an op I really need to have but not urgent so putting it off for a couple of years, was now just for a few days sleep in hospital! I mean who even gets actual sleep in a hospital? But it honestly would be bliss..

When my eldest was a newborn we went out and left the front door swinging wide open... Twice... In the same week. He didn't sleep much. One of the times, we'd also left the oven on.

Found an open block of cheese in the (cheese) biscuit tin.

@iwantareindeer that is utterly hilarious!

@blablablah

Ive been there with 2 odd shoes.

Went out round the shops with my dad and newborn ds and dad didnt even say anything. When I got home the other pair of two odd shoes were on the kitchen floor laughing at me. That year for Christmas, my husband got me a pair of odd shoes as a laugh. Shoe-gate happened in the Feb. Yep, He held on to that one for a while.
Another time I had only done eyeliner on one eye and was looking at a make up stand in superdrug none the wiser. Until my dad said "oh have you run out of your eye stuff?" 😬

Putting cartoons/a movie on tv just so I can have a nap on the sofa on a Saturday afternoon. Only chance I can do it as DH is at work then.

I genuinely enjoyed having my third degree tear repaired in theatre. Newborn was with dad and midwives, I wasn't responsible for any other humans, spinal block so no pain, catheter so didn't have to get off my backside to pee, warming blankets on my legs. I fell asleep for the whole operation with about 6 strangers working on my parts.

My SIL out to work with 2 different navy shoes on...but they were different height heels! She must have hobbled the whole way in.

I can relate to a lot of these and I can add -
Spent the whole day with an old pair of pants tucked in my leggings down the back of one leg and didn’t realise until my knee felt weird.

I remember watching c beebies and would cover one eye with my hand and alternate. Thought if one eye could rest for a bit, it might help.

Went to hospital for a week with asthma. It felt like I was on holiday.

My friend fell asleep having a root canal last week. The dentist felt bad waking her up (twin toddlers)

Never had so much hair on my body 😂 who has time to shave ?

I quite enjoyed having to go to bed with 24hr flu like symptoms after my civid jabs.

I looked all around the house for my car keys, which were still in the car!
I've fallen asleep reading my toddler a bedtime story, he probably falls asleep after me.
I went to the shop and bought alcohol free wine by mistake!

Hallucinations
Mental breakdowns
Splitting with partner
Rubbing toothpaste into my face instead of moisturiser
Forgetting passport at airport

Fantasised about Mr Tumble...

(That's a joke)

I got off a thirty two hour flight I took alone with a three year old and a five year old, while I was 6 months pregnant. Arrived home to find (now) ex partner had not even managed to put sheets on any bed for children and I to get into. Fell asleep multiple times in shower. Huge fantasies about being admitted to hospital so I could sleep. Did not want to leave hospital after giving birth to third baby. His inconsideration and selfishness contributed hugely to my exhaustion, which got to dangerous levels.

Was so excited to go into hospital to have my third by Caesar because I would get a five day “break”. And it was! It was genuinely relaxing. Major surgery and a newborn, it was still great.

This was right before Covid too. So lots of beautiful nurses taking care of me, great pain medicine, cups of tea brought to my bed. It was heaven!

I got halfway through my walk to work before I realised I had forgotten to put my skirt on. I had tights (not opaque), a top, and a denim jacket.

No one said anything.

I was too tired to even feel embarrassed.

Going into a room and immediately forgetting why I did