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Parenting

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Original poster

Can school do this?

89 replies

TurnUpTurnip · 17/12/2021 12:03

A couple of years ago I left dd 9 home alone for half an hour to take my other children to school (dd had chicken pox but was fine in herself) This was a one off as I don’t usually leave her, my son told the school that I had left dd alone and school reported me to ss... anyway nothing came of it but I was a bit surprised to be reported. Anyway my son is now 9 (10 in a couple of months) I occasionally leave him alone to nip to the shops as he hates coming, anyway the other day he was a bit unwell so I left him alone to take the others to school, anyway I mentioned it to my mum and she said you better be careful the school don’t report you again, I don’t see what there is to report? The school is 15 mins walk each way and there is no legal age for leaving a child home alone, my son has his own phone and can contact me if there is a problem. Are school right for reporting this?

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DropYourSword · 17/12/2021 12:15

But... they haven’t reported anything this time yet.

Original poster

TurnUpTurnip · 17/12/2021 12:15

No they haven’t I should have been clearer, CAN they report me for doing it? I thought it was parents choice?

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DropYourSword · 17/12/2021 12:19

Sorry, pressed post too soon!
I guess a school can make a report any time they feel they have a concern. And then it’s up to SS to decide whether it’s something they need to pursue or not.
If your doing nothing wrong then like you say nothing will come of it.
I think I’d prefer schools to be over-cautious when it comes to reporting rather than too laid back, to minimise awful outcomes.
But it does seem a little much to be fair!

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SleepingStandingUp · 17/12/2021 12:19

Well anyone can report anything. SS will make a decision based on what evidence they have.

Lucked · 17/12/2021 12:20

There is no absolute legal age so there is some parent choice (but only to to a degree). The choice has to be reasonable which is open to interpretation. School might not consider themselves qualified to make the distinction and so act out of caution and ask social services to assess.

Graphista · 17/12/2021 12:23

I wouldn't be doing this as a regular OR a one off thing 9 is simply too young.

If the school report you that is a 2nd report to ss for the same thing and you may well find they then keep a regular eye on you and your kids is it really worth that worry and grief for a little inconvenience?

getsanta · 17/12/2021 12:23

Of course they can. I think it would be ridiculous for them to do so, but they've already done it once, so why wouldn't you think they can?

Original poster

TurnUpTurnip · 17/12/2021 12:25

I regularly see posters on here leaving children alone for much longer that's why I asked, then I met my mum by their school the other day (there school is closer to her house than my house is to her s and she had some stuff to give me) and she said she better go before they see her so they don't suspect he's left alone. The school is only one mile way away.

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Original poster

TurnUpTurnip · 17/12/2021 12:27

@Graphista

I wouldn't be doing this as a regular OR a one off thing 9 is simply too young.

You wouldn't leave a child who is 10 in a couple of months home for half an hour?

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Original poster

TurnUpTurnip · 17/12/2021 12:31

And it wasn’t for inconvenience she had chicken pox so couldn’t go outside but I’m a lone parent so had no one else to take the other children to school, unfortunately that is also frowned upon keeping all children off school when one is unwell.

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WaltzingToWalsingham · 17/12/2021 12:31

Personally I would leave a sensible nine-year-old at home for half an hour during daytime, after going through a list of "dos and don'ts" with them, assuming the child is happy to be left and you live in a safe area with neighbours close by who they can call upon if necessary. I think it's fine.

Schools are part of a MASH (multi-agency safeguarding hub), which collates information from multiple sources to try to get a complete picture of possible danger in a child's life. They report things which might suggest a problem, in combination with other things from other sources. If no other concerns are raised, nothing happens and the report is mothballed.

Occasionally however, these seemingly minor details, in combination with other things, can indicate neglect or abuse. So if school report that a child is left home alone, a neighbour reports that the children often ask for food because there's nothing to eat, a friend's parent reports that the child never has a coat even in winter...then a picture of neglect forms and action is taken.

So in short, they can report it because its probably not significant but if the MASH have other information then it might indicate a reason to be concerned.

2toastornot2toast · 17/12/2021 12:33

Yes they can. They can report to SS anything to build up a picture. SS decide whether to act and if theres a history of you leaving children unattended they would probably follow up on it.

LadyIckenham · 17/12/2021 12:34

As PP have said, school can report for anything.

I wouldn't have thought it would be a concern, though. I leave my 9 year old alone for up to 30 mins. He knows how to call me and that if anyone comes to the door he doesn't answer it and we have helpful neighbours nearby. He's in Y5 and that's the age that his school allow them to walk home unattended (with parental consent), so that's been a bit of a marker for me.

LIZS · 17/12/2021 12:34

If they felt it was a Safeguarding issue yes they can.

girlmom21 · 17/12/2021 12:36

It's the schools responsibility to flag any concerns. They may well have had reason for concern depending on what was actually said. If that's the case they were right to report you.

Sirzy · 17/12/2021 12:37

If a school has reason to believe a child is at risk then yes they are right to record and if they deem necessary report it.

These things can paint part of a much bigger picture. I’m not saying it does In your case but it’s better safe than sorry

JSL52 · 17/12/2021 12:37

It depends on the child I suppose. Could your Mum have taken the others as she lives nearby ?
It's just in an emergency- I know he's got a phone but you couldn't be there immediately.

GingerbreadandJellytots · 17/12/2021 12:39

I don't see a big problem with Leaving a 9 year old home for short periods of time for a good reason. I have been teaching mine recently about safety when home alone as I thought it was a good age and as you said, as a lone parent in case I need to take their sibling to school. I was left from younger than that and also used to walk to school from 8. I'm now wondering if I've got it very wrong. But surely a 9 year old is old enough if not when? Obviously depending how sensible the child is etc.

Original poster

TurnUpTurnip · 17/12/2021 12:39

@JSL52

It depends on the child I suppose. Could your Mum have taken the others as she lives nearby ? It's just in an emergency- I know he's got a phone but you couldn't be there immediately.

No she doesn't live near by, the school is just closer to her than my house as she has to pass the school to get to mine.

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Original poster

TurnUpTurnip · 17/12/2021 12:41

@GingerbreadandJellytots

Yes it interesting isn't it There is another thread on here thinks it's in chat? Where many people leave 8,9,10 year olds for an hour or two alone but on this one it's not ok to leave a 9 almost 10 year old for 30 mins 🤷

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MintJulia · 17/12/2021 12:42

The school is erring on the side of caution. With recent news, you can't really blame them. They are doing their job.

I used to leave my 9yo at home for two hours when I had my hair cut. He had snacks, his computer and a phone. He could email or ring me at any time and in an emergency I could be back with him in minutes.

I also rehearsed with him what to do in the event of a fire - same as they do at school - so he knew to bail out and go to a neighbour on the same side of the road.

Don't worry. Neither you nor the school are doing anything wrong.

Original poster

TurnUpTurnip · 17/12/2021 12:43

It was 2 years ago the report, not recent

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GingerbreadandJellytots · 17/12/2021 12:53

If school say they can walk home alone at 9 y they can't also say they shouldn't be home alone for 30mins IMO it's worse walking home for 30 mins than being home. I would be less worried with my DC watching tv alone than crossing roads and all the stranger danger.

Sprogonthetyne · 17/12/2021 13:05

Just checking is your DD 9 now, or was she 9 two years ago when the report happened?

For most 9yo I'd say half an hour alone is fine, but not at 7.

Original poster

TurnUpTurnip · 17/12/2021 13:07

9 at the time, she's soon to be 11 so just under 2 years ago

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