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Original poster

Why don't my consequences work?

68 replies

Jennibell · 25/09/2021 08:27

Honestly I'm at my wit's end. My 8yo DS is obsessed with TV and gaming (like a lot of kids), but recently I will go into his room at night (10ish) and he will have turned his TV back on and will be watching something or playing a game! After catching him he will receive a pushinment of no TV or games for a week (or something similar). It's really hard for him and he seems like he understands and is learning from it but as soon as the week is up he repeats the same behaviour! I don't want to have to resort to taking his TV away because I feel like that will just fix the behaviour but not the underlying problem. Please, any advice would be welcome!!

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Brollywasntneededafterall · 25/09/2021 08:28

Remove games and remote.
Stop the punishments.
Let him earn game time.

Nowisthemonthofmaying · 25/09/2021 08:29

Honestly, I would just take the TV away. Noone needs a bedroom TV at that age and it's obviously just too much temptation for him.

Mybalconyiscracking · 25/09/2021 08:31

Your child does not need a TV in his room at the age of 8. Remove it!

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WheelieBinPrincess · 25/09/2021 08:32

He’s 8 and obviously struggling not to give into the temptation- so remove it. If you told yourself you weren’t going to eat your favourite food anymore but left it where you could see it at all times in your bedroom you’d probably struggle as well.

Original poster
Jennibell · 25/09/2021 08:33

Thing is, before he had a TV I had the same problem with him reading his books and playing with his toys. I worry if I take away the TV the behaviour will just transfer to something else.

OP posts:
Lazypuppy · 25/09/2021 08:33

Yeah an 8 yo doesnt need a tv in their bedroom, its obviously too much o a temptation for him

RNBrie · 25/09/2021 08:33

Why does you 8 yr old have a TV in his bedroom? Impulse control is hard when you're young.

My 9 yr old was reading after lights out, so now I take her book away when I say goodnight. She's allowed 30 mins of screen time a day during the week and a little more at weekends.

The games children play are designed to be addictive so you can't blame him for being addicted...

Smartiepants79 · 25/09/2021 08:34

Yep, take the TV out.
It’s too much temptation.
Not even full grown adults are very good at denying themselves the things they love.
It’s right there. Of course he’s going to play with it.

Magicalwoodlands · 25/09/2021 08:35

They just don’t have the maturity to consider that they will be tired the next day. Even right until about twenty five Smile

Definitely remove the TV.

user89000005 · 25/09/2021 08:35

Well you need to take the TV away because he can't be trusted with one, if he's going to break the rules I'd rather mine did so reading rather than watching TV. He doesn't deserve a TV so he doesn't get one, it's a privilege not a right etc.

drspouse · 25/09/2021 08:37

It's typical 8 year old to read books after lights out!
Get a Hue bulb and confiscate his torch. If you must have a TV in his room (but you don't need one) get a Wi-Fi plug for it.

WheelieBinPrincess · 25/09/2021 08:37

An eight hour old I was a nanny for was a bugger for reading all night. A quick flick of a certain switch in the fuse box until morning sorted that out.

00100001 · 25/09/2021 08:39

Remove the TV, there's absolutely no reason for an 8yo to need a TV in their room.

Tell him he can read for X amount of time,then it's lights out. If he carries on, take the bulb with you when it's time for lights out

Pissinthepottyplease · 25/09/2021 08:42

Your setting him up to fail by putting a TV in is room. How many adults have stayed up later than they originally planned because they got sucked into watching something on TV? It’s asking too much of him.

Retrievemysanity · 25/09/2021 08:42

Op, your son obviously finds the TV too tempting and it’s become an addiction. I personally hate TV’s in bedrooms, I think it’s really bad to let primary aged children have a TV in their rooms. Take it away.

freetorunwild · 25/09/2021 08:45

My 11 year old was the same especially if we didn't go out that day but also still struggled even if we had a busy day and it was because he got himself into a routine so didn't feel tired but also said he needed the tv to wind down. So now I let him have 30 mins of settling down time to watch tv downstairs and then 30 mins of a book or drawing and he falls asleep pretty easy now

jendifer · 25/09/2021 08:47

He doesn’t need a tv.
When you talk to him, why is he doing it? Is he still awake, bored, can’t settle, worried, defiant?

HotPenguin · 25/09/2021 08:49

I don't think a book or toys are as addictive as TV and video games, and the blue light will stop him from sleeping. So yes just take the TV away.

FreeBritnee · 25/09/2021 08:50

I had a TV in my room as a kid and it was a really bad idea. I won’t be repeating that with my children.

Original poster
Jennibell · 25/09/2021 08:50

I just asked him. He's said he does it because he's bored and can't sleep.

OP posts:
Scarby9 · 25/09/2021 08:52

@WheelieBinPrincess
I used to read under the covers with a torch.

Reallybadidea · 25/09/2021 08:53

You can't force anyone to go to sleep. Sounds like he's not tired or is over stimulated when he goes to bed. I'd look at whether he's getting enough physical activity in the daytime, whether his bedtime is too early for his needs and whether he needs some winding down time before bed.

Mischance · 25/09/2021 08:55

Take the TV out of his room! Just that.

He will then learn that bedroom is for sleeping. Of course he switches it on - he is too young to resist that temptation - so remove it from his room.

Leave a little light on so he can look at books; but no TV in the bedroom!

FudgeSundae · 25/09/2021 08:56

Please don’t take his bulb away or flick the fuse in the fuse box! I would have been terrified age 8 if I woke after a nightmare and couldn’t turn the light on!

InnPain · 25/09/2021 08:59

Take the remote control away for tele and any control pads for console. That way he can’t play once times up.

Leaving those with him is giving him the option to switch it all back on. If he doesn’t have the option he’ll fall asleep I’m sure.