The 2 (or more?!) Under 2 Support Thread!

[GrrrlWith2Boys]

Post your woes (or joys) here if you're currently tackling 2 kids under 2 (please say i'm not alone!)

DS1 is super wingey today and driving me batty...the slightest thing and he's whining and crying.

Have managed a 10 min walk with pushchair to get out of house. DS1 watching far too much TV, i haven't brushed my hair and the dog won't stop barking.

I need some gin.

Aw, Supergrrrl... Not sad at all, by the sound of it. Quite right to feel fed up. DD would be gutted too if playgroup went awol. (As would I.) I wonder what happened to yours -- could they be taking a week off? Have you got the right day? (I'm good at forgetting which day it is, being home most of the time.)

It's such a hassle being stuck inside, or around the house. I can go out with both, but it's like a military operation and there are some places I can't go. I almost sulked when DP hung around wasting time instead of getting ready for a walk with me and the DCs, then suggested we go in the garden instead. He doesn't realise that it's for my sanity as well as DD's entertainment! And I can go into the garden on my own, thanks... (Fortunately, he got with the programme )

Can you face doing something DS might have done at playgroup at home today? (OK so maybe you don't want a house covered in paint, but playdough works, or playing in the bath/sink. I even cooked cakes with DD last weekend (the simplest recipe I could find) and she loved it.) (Tell me to p* off if you'd rather sit home watching beebies.)

Actually, Supergrrl look on the brighter side you did leave the house (and that is something to be proud of).

no, it's always Wed at 1pm...i did wonder if i'd cocked the day up too. But yes, at least i left the house!

DS1 is napping now anyway, bless him.

Might have a go at making toad-in-hole for tea while i have some quiet.

Supergrrl, know how you feel, we went out to go to the church in the village which has a play corner (as I'm sure I've said before, there isn't a huge amount to do here!) the other day, after being stuck inside with colds. They had locked the doors, because they were doing building work, it was a Wednesday, so everything else was closed and then it started raining - I was stood at the door of the church with dd1 screaming "TEDDY, TEDDY" (there is a teddy picture puzzle that she loves in there), whilst dd2 woke up expecting some milk, I have to admit I was pathetic, burst into tears (am I still allowed to blame hormones?),ran home and let cbeebies make it all better.

I have got another cold (think I need some sun), so dh is entertaining girls downstairs, whilst I 'have a sleep' - ie go on mumsnet. He just came up to find a book and caught me - he said, "I knew you would be doing that". To make me feel even worse he was looking for a cookbook so he could make a plum crumble, as a surprise for tea.

So you've been found out, HJ? I always have the feeling that I'm just about to be rumbled. (Or else that DP is a regular poster under a different name and I know nothing about it ). Enjoy the crumble.

I have a night in on my own with both of them (DP has a night out in London) -- I hope it won't be too bad.

Me too Chaotica, dh is out for a while, so it's just me the crumble and the girls..... and maybe a small glass of white wine

Have already had to go up and read The Snow Bears to calm down dd1, who woke up saw her shadow on the wall and freaked out. She was stood up in her cot pointing at it and screaming, must remind dh to turn out the lamp next time he puts her to bed!

Are there any other groups around Supergrrl? It's pretty grim when no-one talks to you. I stopped going to one near me, I started to get really down because everyone was so unfriendly, and I think dd1 picked up on that and would spend the whole time clinging to my leg.

Supergrrll really felt for you with your story about the awol playgroup!!! Ds1 would be really diappointed too.

I am really lucky that I have found one full of lovely mums - I ahve been to crap ones before too where everyone is in their little cliques and it's crap.

Well done for leaving the house though!

I must have been really lucky so far. The m&b group is really small and seems quite nice. Not that many people talk to me in playgroup but DD keeps me busy and I usually talk to the ones who look as left out as me (and the nursery staff who run the place). From talking to people at the M&B group it sounds as if some of the groups around here are awful -- glad I didn't bother to go.

Actually though, I go for the attitude I eventually worked out in school and I really don't give a shit (I did worry for years and I was really shy and it upset me, until one day I decided that I didn't give a damn what other people thought of me -- makes life a lot simpler ) (Instead of worrying me these days it amuses me (most of the time) to wonder whether people are bitching about me behind my back )

Talking of playgroup though - it's on later today -- I'd better go to bed...

it IS like being new at school- they all know each other, they even sit the other side of the hall. If it wasn't for me meeting DS1's childminder there, i'd have nobody to talk to at all. But i go for him, not me, so i just sit there anyway. There is another session on a Thursday morning, but i can't imagine it's any different.

I'm going to try and see my friends more though.Meeting one for lunch Saturday who has a baby, and my other friend is coming over tomorrow for a take away and wine with me and DH.

Spoke to childminder today- turned out she was late and she went too and found it closed, so at least i feel a bit less stupid now.

DS1 at hers today, so going to drink my coffee (which could power a rocket, it's so strong) and get some washing on. Taking DS2 for his jabs later then.

Feeling really down today- i've had a shitty week so far, and i've been so impatient already today i feel like a crappy mother.

Ditto on the school thing, am worrying about moving at the end of the month and having to do the whole new girl (I say girl, because although i'm 38 I actually feel about 12 when i go to these things)toddler group thing again!
I think groups have different personalities, the one that I stopped going to has always had a rep for being unfriendly, and I would have been terrified to ask some of the mums there over to my house - they all seemed pretty judgemental. I guess they had also put off a lot of other mums like me, because someone started another group, and I now go to that one with all the mums that didn't want to go to the other one!Maybe try the Thurs one, there might be someone there who can't get to the other session, who is a bit more friendly.
I never managed to develop much of an attitude whilst I was at school as I was such a geek, that I don't think I could have got away with it
We are back to the hospital this afternoon (that's twice this week!)to talk to a surgeon about dd2's lump. Dd1 will be happy, so many toys!
Hope you have an okay day Supergrrl, and your coffe has kicked in.

well i took DS2 for his 1st jabs today at baby clinic- and there were mothers from playgroup there i recognised...and they sat the other side of the waiting room aswell! Their toddlers were coming over and saying hello to me and DS2, and they still didn't say hello to me- and i am pretty distinctive being as i have a half sleeve tattoo and red hair.

Oh well!

I'm feeling a bit better than i have done all week, so i'm determined to hold onto this feeling and be a nicer, calmer mother (and wife) from now on!

no, i did look over a few times, and i was talking to their toddlers. They all know each other- as they were arriving they were all 'hello so-and-so' and 'how are you so-and-so' I felt a bit out of it to be honest, so i left it.

maybe if playgroup re-appears next week i'll try talking to them

Ah ha! this is what I was looking for when I joined mumsnet! YAY! I've got two, 14 months apart. Only just starting to breathe again as youngest turns 1. Feeling a bit lonely and frazzled after the worst 12 months of my life (how sad is that for DD2? first 12 months of DD1 were lovely) and looking for a laugh with some people who get it.

Supergrrrl Plucked up courage to go to my first mother and baby group in the village today - nervous as hell that noone would talk to me. Wasn't too bad. But there was a lot of singing and clapping involved so we couldnt chat much anyway!justabouttosplashoutinthesales - will take your advice. must take the initiative!

Hi Padboz and welcome.

Just back from playgroup myself - it was pretty empty, maybe because of the weather. And maybe some of the older kids have moved on. Anyway, whatever the reason, I'm the one with the big kid (DD who is very tall for her age) who was running around like crazy and insisting on playing with everything even after it had been put away. I was amazed she just about remembered to take turns and didn't have a meltdown once (well, she did before she went but that's another matter -- she was determined to go to playgroup without a nappy or shoes ). (FWIW I did try to talk to people as well, although some of the regulars still keep pretty silent.)

HJ -- I hope the hospital visit went well. It must be really worrying for you. How old is DD2 now? (Sorry - I should know but I've forgotten.) BTW Don't get the idea that just because I developed an attitude I'm not a geek! - I was (am?) such a geek I defined geekiness, that's why I had to do something about it (although it must have helped that I came from quite a loud and assertive family).

Supergrrrl - I'm with the others: go and say hello (or something) at the next playgroup and if they other mums are still unfriendly then they're not worth it. (People are weird as well -- maybe they think that, because you look distinctive, that you're not shy and you'd talk to them if you wanted to - dumb, I know, but it happens to me sometimes.)

Hello everyone, hello padboz, glad your day not too bad Supergrrrl, Chaotica, hooray for the geek (was that too geeky?)

Dd2 has to have an operation to have her lump removed, surgeon still not 100% sure what it is, but threw another, 'could be..' into the pot, he seemed surprised that it hadn't been done sooner, which worried me, but I'm glad it is going to be sorted.

hello people - thanks for saying hello - makes me feel welcome funny isn't it - this place allows us to just say hello and see what happens - if we make a twit of ourselves we can stay annoymous (sp?) and people just respond and are so lovely. mums and toddlers is so much more scary tho! thing is Supergrrrl you clearly have the guts to chat to people on here - and you have things to say and I sooooooo sympathise and therefore I want to talk to you! and thats mainly cos you've let it be known whats going on in your world and instantly I can see we have something in common. I seem to remember from something in an A level its called Johari window. Those girls at the HV clinic probably shallowly look at your tattoo and think they have nothing in common but nothing could be further from the truth! EVERY mum has something in common even if its just a wistful memory of lie ins and not having to bend sideways to strap/unstrap X number of small people because you need one tiny thing in shop. Obviously I've only been on mumsnet a few days so I have no right to welcome anyone to anything but I am making it a resolution that when I make some pals at mums and toddlers ( or here even ) that I will make a bee line for anyone that looks new or lost. No-one goes to mums and toddlers because they have too many friends. Established groups may get a bit comfy and not appreciate commers in but sod em. My approach for my first visit was to befriend other peoples children - I figure if they like me then the mother will have to talk to me out of loyalty to thier little one ha ha! Chin up SuperGrrrl We'll figure this out.