Feeling trapped by my toddler

[sundown32]

My beautiful DS is 18 months old and so shy around anyone who’s not me or his dad. My MIL and PIL come to stay regularly (a few nights every month) and it’s like his personality changes as soon as they arrive - he goes from happy and chatty to quiet and withdrawn. He will play with MIL for a few minutes if I’m in the room, but as soon as I leave them alone he cries. He won’t sit on her knee without bursting into tears and holding his hands out to be picked up by me. He’s like this with friends as well - he’s very cautious around them and cries if they make a fuss of him.

Friends with babies talk about leaving them with grandparents whilst they go to the shops or get their hair done. Because DS gets so upset I don’t feel I can do this and am so envious of friends who can! Does anyone have any advice?!

Hi lovely - have you tried leaving him with your in laws for a short walk or while you go for a coffee? I just ask because my DS can be very clingy when I am there but when I actually leave he’s fine. I know you say he cries if you leave, but how long have you actually left them for? That said, my DS was 9 months when he started being looked after by in laws when I went back to work so quite a bit younger, but the first time my MIL came to see him on her own when I handed him over he broke his heart, but when she took him out in the pushchair he was fine. Maybe worth a try giving them a bit longer alone to see if that helps xxx

I left him recently with MIL for an hour and he cried the whole time I was gone. DH’s close friend is getting married in October - we both wanted to go but I’ve had to turn down the invitation as I don’t think DS will cope