Newborn sleepless nights

[Shmerlock]

Oh my lord, nothing could have prepared me for the exhaustion I would feel with my little one (DD).

She's currently 9 days old and has yet to sleep tonight!! Each night she wakes hourly - usually wanting a feed, but will only feed for 10mins before nodding off on the boob! As soon as I place her back in the crib she starts to flail and whinge, if I ignore this (which if I'm honest I rarely do) then this turns to full blown screams!

I wouldn't mind all this if it weren't for the fact that in comparison she has a very good sleep pattern during the day!!!

Anyone else in the same boat - please feel free to vent below!

Is this standard newborn behaviour!? Any advice is appreciated - so far I've tried white noise, winding her, nappy changes, long cuddles after a feed bug nothing seems to work!!!

Yep, you have a newborn some sleep a little better but some don't. DD1 I couldn't even lay down in the crib..... so I ended up cosleeping. There's that option if you're getting too exhausted. It can be done safely

Look up the safe co sleeping guidelines and put her in bed with you. She'll sleep much longer. She doesn't know she's not a cave baby, so her instinct is to avoid being left alone.

@grey12 this is exactly what my DD is like!

@BertieBotts I'll have a look, thank you!

Think I'll have to look into co-sleeping then, I feel sick I'm so tired. She just won't sleep unless it's on me! I love her too pieces but the exhaustion is becoming too much. I've found myself nodding off just holding her in bed which worries me!

I swaddled both of mine when they were tiny purely cos of the arm flailing waking them both up! I used a big muslin and wrapped their arms by their sides, worked a treat.
Congratulations on the baby, it’s exhausting and exhilarating x

@MonkeyPuddle she gets herself even more distressed when we swaddle her, she really screams because she can't be to her hands! She's very feisty!!! I love her so much but I wish she'd bloody sleep. I can't believe it's now 4am and I've yet to sleep!!

Ah my love! I would swaddle mine and then latch them back on for a few more sucks to tip them over to sleep.
Wake up your other half, it’s time for you to tap out, big glass of water and sleep.

Babies are sods for this. She's got no idea that it's night time and all she wants is you - she's barely aware she's outside of you yet. It will get better. DD was like this, I grabbed whatever sleep I could during the day and eventually it got better, although for a while I was so tired I thought I was going mad. Cosleep if you can safely, get dad to jump in, know that it does get better. Congratulations, you are doing a great job!

She’s doing what babies do. Read up on the fourth trimester. And congratulations!!

I’d use love to dream sleep bags. Mine has had her since birth and she loves it. Swaddling in a wrap didn’t work as like yours she wants her hands up x

@MaidenoftheSpear @MonkeyPuddle Dad's currently got her doing skin to skin with him, she's yawning her little head off but we've not got high hopes it'll stay this way for long at the moment, she settles so well on us but the minute she's placed in the crib she wails and screams. Her arms and legs are never still either! She kicks and flails them at the same time bless her.

We wondered if it was because she had quite a distressing birth - it was forceps plus she had the cord wrapped around her neck. As a result, we had an extended stay on the postnatal ward afterwards as I had a huge hemmhorage and extended episiotomy. She was very stressed on the ward, as was I, and I always wonder now if that set her off on this difficulty sleeping?

@TheFoz I'd hoped (perhaps wishful thinking!) that we'd get SOME sleep a night 🙈

Nah I wouldn’t have thought so, it’s just all of a sudden she’s got all this room around her, before everything was warm, dark, she’s never felt hunger, everything’s changed! Plus babies have the moro reflex which can cause their arms to flail. She’s just being a newborn. Now go to bloody sleep! You absolutely to to rest up after what you’ve been through.

@Newmum29 ive not heard of those, will gave a look! We did try one of the tomee tippee gro bags a couple of nights ago, but she hated that too! She likes to hold and suck her hands - she's done it since birth, and in every scan we had during pregnancy her hands were at her face or in her mouth! So she always becomes very distressed if she can't get to them

@MonkeyPuddle I know, you're right! Thank you for all the advice, and listening to my moaning!! Take care 😊

The next to me style cribs are good when you have a clingy little one (who doesn't!)
Have you had her checked for tongue tie and is she gaining weight ok - just thinking when you mention the hands in mouth that is a hunger cue?

No worries, you’re a new mum, an utter goddess of life! Deffo try the wraps if she loves hand access.

You’ve got this.

I’m awake with a newborn too. He did a giant poo at 4am and is now feeding like mad because he must feel all empty 🤣

Though she may have been a bit more unsettled initially after the birth I wouldn’t think that’s the reason for her sleep pattern now. It really is normal new born behaviour.

Give cosleeping a try, once you get used to it it’s really quite lovely. My DS is 3.5 weeks old now and will now settle in his Moses basket most of the time. If he doesn’t we bring him into our bed without pushing the basket too much. I’d rather bring him into our bed and have the sleep!

Swaddling hasn’t worked for us as DS likes to suck on his hands

Congratulations! At this age babies don't have the normal sleep/wake cycle as they can't differentiate the different times of the day. My second baby is now 8 weeks old and has just started sleeping through the night so I feel your pain!

Also with breastfeeding, from what I understand they feed constantly to build up your milk supply. My little one still has days now where she feeds hourly but only for like 5 mins at a time as an example x

6 weeks and 1 day, we've been awake since 3am and he's just pee'd all over me. I need sleep more than I ever thought I could.

Honestly I get it my one loves to suck too. Both parents are thumbsuckers. We didn’t want to give her a dummy and she’s now 13 weeks and still sucks but through the bag 🤷‍♀️

6:40am and she's still not slept - other than on us for bursts of about 10mins 😫.

@BastardMonkfish yes she's in a next to me crib at the moment, a SnuzPod one - not next to us enough though 😅 unless she's on us she doesn't want to sleep! And no tongue tie! Midwife checked her in hospital and again when they did their first home visit.

@37TTCLeeds I feel your pain, it's so so hard.

Can you try a dummy if she likes to suck?

How about cranial osteopathy- very good for babies born by forceps.

Theyre all like that really but it gets better. All mine took a couple of weeks to figure out day/night but with DD3 I've coslept from the start and its been a million times easier. If you follow the guidelines its just as safe as having her in the cot and a lot safer than dozing off holding her. If not I would take turns to sleep for an hour while the other stays awake with her sleeping on your chest - not a long term solution but better than the night you've just had

I remember it took about 3 weeks for the balance between night and day to start to improve. They don’t realise it’s night time and they are supposed to be asleep!! It will get better. Good luck, it’s brutal