To have a fourth or not?…. Would you?

[Waddayathink]

I have 8 year old twins and a 5 year old… I’m very broody for another.
I’m 33, DH 43. Would you… or not?

@ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba

yup. we actually agreed on 4 before we got married. ended up with 7🤣

go for it!

Why 7?

I would, but then I have 5. We did need a new car between numbers 3-4 and then a new house between numbers 4-5 though. They drive me mad but are utterly worth it.

No, but then I think more than 2 is too many.

No. You have three - you are blessed, enjoy them.

We have four and it’s BLOODY hard work. We adore them and adore having a little “gang” who play together BUT all of our friends stopped at 2 and their lives are so much more straightforward! Even 3 kids fit in a normal sized car!

@Maggiesfarm

No. You have three - you are blessed, enjoy them.

I have 4. Feel v blessed and enjoy each and every one of them and they all enjoy each other.

Love isn’t finite. X4 the fun and love.

You are young and your DCs are still young enough for another.

My DCs love being from a big family.

Bizarrely it’s also nicer sitting around a table of 6 than 5. The extra work is the laundry - cooking and cleaning for 3 or 4 makes no difference.

If you feel in your heart that you want another I would go for it!!

I also would consider it for your 5 year old. This will probably sound crazy but I have close friends where there's twins and then another. As they got older, the younger child has always felt 'left out'. They wish there was another sibling 'for them' if that makes sense.
This is the case even now in their 40s....

At your age, OP, and also feeling broody? Definitely I’d go for number 4.

@RampantIvy
why 7?
so that I could name them the days of the week, colours of the rainbow and names of the 7 dwarfs.

Grumpy Red Monday often wishes we chose proper names for them

@Mollylikestodance

If you feel in your heart that you want another I would go for it!!

I also would consider it for your 5 year old. This will probably sound crazy but I have close friends where there's twins and then another. As they got older, the younger child has always felt 'left out'. They wish there was another sibling 'for them' if that makes sense.
This is the case even now in their 40s....

But the 5 year old will never have a twin, there will be a six year gap between them and the potential new sibling If the 5 year old was 2 (or 3 at a push) I could see your logic.

I have 4. Eldest 2 are 19 & 16 then younger 2 are 10&11 so big gaps then a little one.

It’s hard work, they are all at different stages and my head is mince most of the time. But I love them all. The bigger house and car is ridiculous but back down again as my eldest is nearly 20 and off to live with his girlfriend.
Only you can decide but if you do enjoy them as it goes two fast.

I wouldn't. 3 kids are more than enough, in my opinion.

No. I don't approve of big families. The world is already over-populated.

@Viviennemary

🤣
newsflash: big families don't care about your on anyone else's approval.

Have you seen the weather in Canada and US? Climate change is really happening now but we are all choosing to ignore it. Things are likely to get pretty bad. Having a large family atm is actually insane.

Planet won’t be able to support so many of us living a western lifestyle.

No, but wouldn't have wanted 3 either!

I think the gap between your youngest and the baby would be too big. I know of a few families where there's a gap of 4-6 years between them and the kids just do not get on. Different interests at different ages, if the 5yo at 8 years old doesn't want the 2 year old in his room/toys/games - i don't think it's going to be the sibling bliss you're picturing. Then are you going to want a 5th to keep the baby company? Then number 3 will still be out there on his own.

No, because DH is one of four and I find it very overwhelming at big family occasions- birthdays, Christmas etc, with all my in laws and plus ones. It’s a lot of noise and drama in one place. Three would be my limit.

To be honest the population is declining in the developed world and even today it was announced that in the UK there were more deaths than live births last year.

Really? I wonder what could have caused that?

OP I wouldn’t. But then I would never have had more than 2.

A close friend of mine has 4. The eldest 3 are all close in age then a 7 year gap to the youngest. She definitely doesn’t have time to give to all four and I think the older two definitely lose out. But I’m sure there are others that manage to balance it better.

No , the world is over populated. People need to think about the impact of multiple kids

I personally don't see any need for more than 2 kids.

The global population needs to massively decline. I wish it wasn’t true but it is. Climate change is actually happening now we are just ignoring it. Our poor kids.