Baby only goes to bed at night immediately after a massive bottle.. how to break the cycle?

[Fudgedtwister]

We would ideally go bottle, bath, massage or book then sleep. Our little one prefers to have either bottle at the end or want it interspersed between all of the activities above. Is there a way to break the cycle and get her not to rely on drinking herself to sleep? Baby is 3mo, I appreciate a fully formed routine is unlikely at this point but less reliance on milk would be great!

I don't understand why you want to reduce their reliance on milk; can you explain?

The advice for under 1's is to follow their lead in terms of feeding (whether bottle or breast). Guidance below:

www.nhs.uk/conditions/baby/breastfeeding-and-bottle-feeding/bottle-feeding/advice/

Feeding to sleep is biologically normal. My 9 month old does it at night- she doesn't need it for naps and is able to go back to sleep without milk during the night if she wakes up (she still needed a night feed at 3 months though) so I really don't see the problem with it. I love that last feed too.

I've found things are so much easier if you just go with your baby's cues and follow their lead and not try to get them to fit in with what you think they should be doing. What do you think the problem with them feeding to sleep is? Is it because everyone bangs in about putting them down drowsy but awake? Again just not something we've found necessary - she doesn't seem to have a drowsy mode anyway she's 100% full on till she flakes out usually, but not doing that really hasn't impacted sleep overall.

Book? For a 3 month old ! I started reading to them at 3/4
My 1.5 year and most kids I know take a bottle at bedtime

Do you feed to sleep for naps in the day? If your baby sleeps without feeding in the day time then I wouldn’t worry hugely about bedtime yet.

You could try just altering the routine slightly though so you feed a little earlier downstairs, then go upstairs to change nappy, into pyjamas and into bed.

I think at 12 weeks, you can attempt a routine all you like, but ultimately, your wee baby's in charge at the moment.

Totally normal - no need to break cycle at this age! My son still had a bottle during stories when he was almost 2. But could fall asleep without the milk - it was just a comfort to wind him down before he went to bed. Obviously didn't have milk for naps.

At 3 months it's expected they drink to sleep surely? I'm pretty sure DS fell asleep on the bottle at night until he was almost 1!

We had the same routine till at least three years old – bath, book, bottle, bed.

My DD is nearly 1 and I’ve always done bath, bottle, bed. At 3 months she’d usually fall asleep on the bottle but as she got older she stopped and goes to bed happily wide awake.

When you feed to sleep when the child is older (with teeth), do you brush their teeth after the bottle somehow, or is this something mums are told to do and don't actually? I'm not saying one is wrong or right I'm just a FTM wondering how this works in practice!

I think a lot of people do skip bedtime teeth brushing, or put babies/toddlers into bed with a bottle, but I always cleaned teeth after milk.
I found self settling made a big difference to how well they sleep over night. Not at 3 months but 6 months onwards.

I've always brushed their teeth before bed but they had bottle after that I didn't worry about it! Bottle was always the last part of the bedtime routine and I don't know anyone who did it any differently so can't advise. At that age I wouldn't worry about it.

Bottle in the living room, then teeth on the way to bedroom.

I've never heard of anyone with a routine like this for a small baby. The bottle / breast is the soothing part of the routine that send them off to sleep. Also the later they have the milk the longer they should sleep through? I would worry about bottles before bed well after one.

Do 3mo have teeth? I can't remember! Don't think they do

My younger two didn’t have any teeth until gone 12 months so was never an issue, my eldest had a couple of teeth and I can’t really remember what we did(it was 10 years ago!). We stopped bottles at 12 months.

I fed to sleep until it stops working. That was around 9 months for both mine.

When they got teeth we brushed them in the bath and had milk after. Didn't worry too much about it tbh.

If you're breastfeeding, I'd not bother with a bottle at bed time. Dad can feed another time if they really want to, but your milk has a hormone in that helps baby to sleep.

At this age, just go with the flow

At 3 months old this is absolutely fine :) my 4 month old still feeds to sleep every night. His massive bottle before bed is what keeps him going throughout the night! I don’t think I want him to stop 😂

@Twizbe my baby is formula fed and sleeps through the night. Breastfeeding doesn’t necessarily mean baby will sleep better. If OP wants dad to get involved with the bed time feed then he absolutely should. She deserves a break if needed.

[quote bleachblondemom]@Twizbe my baby is formula fed and sleeps through the night. Breastfeeding doesn’t necessarily mean baby will sleep better. If OP wants dad to get involved with the bed time feed then he absolutely should. She deserves a break if needed.[/quote]
Wasn't a comment against formula. My eldest was combi fed. But I breastfed before bed as was easiest for me and nothing wrong with feeding a 3 month old to sleep.

New mums are often told that a bottle before bed will help baby sleep which isn't always true.

DS used to sleep with a bottle but I broke the daytime habit pretty early on by rocking him to sleep rather than bottle to sleep. So it was bottle upon waking, then play, then rock (sing) to sleep. Night time then followed the same way from about 5-6 months. Bottle, singing & rocking to sleep. Never trained him to self sooth, rocking and now that he is older, cuddling works a treat for us. Day and night.

Just give the bottle last. At 3 months, they’re very much still in “drink milk, coma!” stage.

She's 3 months old, unless you want her going to bed hungry then she's going to need a bottle.

Mine always had a bottle before bed. Once teeth start to pop through you can give the teeth a quick wipe wit a toothbrush, it's more of an issue post-weaning.

Go with the flow OP and treasure these days, it passes so, so quickly.

My baby is five months and still no set routine, I feed her when she is hungry. I think you are expecting too much of a 3 month old.

She is only three months old, it isn't unusual for a baby of that age to want a good feed before sleep.