10yo DD has no friends

[Passthewinepls]

I am heartbroken. DD has for the last 5 years had a really intense ‘best friendship’ with 1 other girl, during lockdown this girl has joined a new friendship group (she was in key worker school, DD was at home with me) which includes a child that my daughter really doesn’t get on with and her best friend has distanced herself from DD. Since the return to school she has been on her own during play time and lunch at school. She is now pretending to be ill to avoid going to school. She feels so isolated and left out and I don’t know how to help her (outside of listening to her and consoling her when she comes home in tears). I’ve spoken to her teacher who was very understanding but doesn’t seem to have given her any help in expanding her friendship circle. Can anybody offer any advice on how I can help her?

It's common for girls this age to switch friends and it can be upsetting, but you can try to encourage your DD to find the positives. For example, practice making new friends now because she will need those skills when she gets to secondary school. Also point out to DD how much SHE herself has changed in the last 5 years - I bet she likes different music, different sports, different hobbies and games. All the other girls will have changed too, so she might find a new group of friends fits her much better. Maybe this girl she didn't used to get on with, is worth another attempt at friendship? Or maybe she could ask to play with an entirely different group of girls?

It does feel horrible when you feel left out, but point out to her how great she will feel when she expands her friendships. She might not like the idea right now, but it's all a part of growing up.

After COVID restrictions lift, does she have any hobbies you could encourage outside of school?