Partner against 13mo starting nursery

[Donut93]

Was looking at putting my LO in nursery for 2 afternoons a week for 2 hours. But my partner is SO against it because of COVID.
I said I would happily wait until when majority of people have been vaccinated but even then he was saying that he still won't be sure because there's still a chance she could get it. I'm not putting her in nursery for my benefit, it would be for her to get the social interaction she's missed out on.
I can see where he's coming from, but he's saying that even when things might be close to as the 'new normal' we will see, he still will be against its

Phase you asked him what his stance is on toddler groups, going to the shops, seeing family, going to the library or for a trip on a bus?

Most research says children only need peer interaction from 2 years old so I wouldn’t worry about nursery but the other things are all important.

The risk is probably more to you than her. She is not in a particularly at risk age group. 2x2 hours a week isn’t very long though so you may find she takes a while to settle in.

This is ridiculous. So, in reality, he wants to wait until the disease is gone entirely? Or until the majority of people have been vaccinated against the most common strains? Let him know by the way, that it wont ever be gone because the virus mutates.

I get so annoyed with this sort of thinking.

To be honest covid issue aside 2 days of only 2 hours is honestly going to be a nightmare in terms of her feeling settled.

Fine. So he can now take a turn at staying home and doing the donkey work and monotony of childd rearing, whilst you go back to work and get your pension, career and mental health back on track. Yes?
He's making excuses.

Does you DH WFH?
Have you not had any contact with anybody else since the pandemic began?
Your LO would gain so much from a few sessions at nursery and the risks of Covid are relatively low. You’re probably thinking 2 hours to start them off but you’ll find by the time they are settled and enjoying their day, it’s time to be collected.

Agree with That. She doesn't need to go to Nursery at this age, well the research suggests not anyway but you really do need to know how he feels in you both meeting friends for a coffee or in the park, baby groups/music groups, going to the library and seeing friends and family.

2 hours twice a week won't do much. I'd look to do half days twice a week otherwise she will likely really struggle to settle.

That said, mine has been in nursery 4-5 full days a week since nurseries opened up in June. There has never been a case at nursery and never even anyone at nursery who has had to self-isolate. My school age one similarly hasn't had a case at school or a bubble that's had to isolate either this entire time.

I think nursery is great and it will be a big benefit to you that you don't realise.

The risk to young children is minimal, so unless you plan to live in an airtight bag for the foreseeable then I think your husband needs a reality check. You will only be holding your child back.

Do you have a nursery willing to take her for just 2 hours a week ? Most won't as they know she will struggle to settle

Agree with PP about 2 hours - it's not long enough to settle and I imagine would be disruptive for the staff. Doesn't give you much of a break either.

Re Covid, has he not been out in the last year then? My DS has been in nursery since the summer, they've had one closure of his room due to a positive test in that time. It's a risk, but a relatively small one compared to the benefits he gets being able to mix and interact with other children.

Hmmmm. He's not very good at science is he Op? Your daughter is more at risk from chicken pox than COVID at that age..

Get your DD in for a couple of days a week and pick up your career, it's not wise to rely on a man

Does he suffer with anxiety? If your DD is healthy the risk to her from Covid is tiny. She would probably be at more risk on the journey to and from nursery.

he's saying that even when things might be close to as the 'new normal' we will see, he still will be against its

And will you be expected to stay home and educate her when she's old enough for school?

I agree with the PPs who have said you might be better going back to work and putting her in Nursery. Are you married @Champagneandmonstermunch?

If you aren't working why would you put in nursery so young? Little kids don't really socialise, they're best play near another child. Around 2 they start to interact more but childcare under around 2.5 or so is for the benefit of the parent not the child. I suggest you go to a toddler group with your child - this was the norm when I was growing up, when few mothers worked. If you work, that's different you need childcare, but you stress it's for your lo and trust me, they don't need nursery

If you don't need nursery for childcare I wouldn't put a 13 month old in for such a short space of time for social interaction. I would save your money. You can do this when going out and about to the parks, toddler groups (as they are starting to open in April), seeing members of the family etc.
As pp have said that most research states that children don't need peer interaction until they're around 2.

Sorry to bang on about this MN obsession OP, but am I right in saying you're not working and you're not married to your partner? If so this puts you in a very financially vulnerable position. I would strongly advise you to go back to work and make sure your partner pays half the childcare bill.