Bribery or threats... How to get 6yo to do school work

[Indecisivelurcher]

How do you go about getting a reluctant 6yo to do any school work?! Dd has been asked to do doodle maths every day (5 questions, on an app, you progress up levels as you learn), plus read x3 books a week. Also asked to do a couple of extra things during the hols, work on some handwriting, learn a poem. The school has tried to make it fun, spark some light competition, set targets. Dd just DOES NOT want to do it. Ever. I've tried to make the maths part of our routine, so she usually does it before school every day. But she's starting to get bargy about it. The reading, there is so much huffing and puffing! I have to be quite firm that she's doing it. She's a bright girl but doesn't like putting effort in to learning in this way, especially if it's something she has to engage her brain to do like a new thing on the maths app. The last thing I want to do is switch her off from learning. If she was struggling, over tired, whatever, I would have no qualms about saying not to do it. But it's the attitude that's got me stumped.

Could you try giving her the options? Eg: DD, today we have to do 5 questions on the app and read one book. Would you like to do the maths before we eat lunch, or after once we have cleared the table? Would you like to read this book or that one? Read before or after you have a bath? You could also try sitting down with her at the table, her reading her book (outloud) and you reading a book or the newspaper (obviously listening to her read at the same time, you just need to give the illusion you are reading alongside her). Give her a drink whilst you do it, and get yourself one, and tell her she can join mummy with 'calm reading time' because she's a big girl now.
it's frustrating, i have 2 6 year olds who are the same and the tips above don't always work, but they do seem to help. all the best

Thanks for replying sleep! I do try to give her a choice when we do it, but she just delays all day long. It's 5pm and we've not done it yet... I don't expect there's a magic answer!

It's tough isn't it! Do you think she would try reading in the bath, if you held the book up and she just had to read? You could also try alternating who reads a page, so she reads one page, you read the other. You might find because she's got something else to focus on (the water) she doesn't find it as hard going x

I suppose what I'm worried about is switching her off by making her, in whatever way, and setting her up the wrong path for her school career.

Anythings worth a try!

I understand. If it's any comfort, my ds (who's now 14) was the exact same at this age, didn't want anything to do with reading or maths etc. He does well at school, and is enjoying reading his books that he has to for english GCSE etc x

Set up a simple visual timetable. Something like this would be good to use - primary schools usually use these as class timetables. Make sure you have a ‘reward’ activity after every ‘schoolwork’ activity.
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The problem is at that age kids see school as for learning and home for relaxing and rightly so IMO. Sadly this year that’s gone out of the window a bit as kids have missed out on so much learning schools are having to rely more on work being completed at home too. A visual timetable, a now and next board or a reward chart might work.

Persevere, it'll be worth it to get in a good homework habit now well before secondary school and the amount they get then! We have a no screens until school work is done rule. There was resistance at first but sticking to the rule and repeating endlessly "school work first" means they now just get on with it.

That's everyone. I'm going with school work at 9am because that's when school would start. Then a snack and break. Then play time and I'll get something out to do with them both. See how it goes!

When we are back at school I'll have to think again.

Over the Christmas holidays? I wouldn't be making her do any of it. Kids really do need the break too, this year especially. It has been a difficult and different year in school for everyone.
Get a kid friendly recipe book (or online) get her to help you read the recipe when making cookies etc
Give her paper and pens and encourage her to draw or make and play with play dough - both these will strengthen hand muscles for handwriting.
I say this as a teacher in early primary.

Ongoing first/then can work well E.g. First maths then TV time etc
Give choices where you can E.g. Would you like to read your book to me or to dad or now/before bed
Break it down in to manageable chunks, have breaks, keep it short and build up time if required

This is over the hols yes, but it's not very much. I'm in the mo homework camp myself but in my head I imagined doing that as an advocate for a willing child who needed a break, marching into the school saying it was more important she had a break 😁 Not meeting absolute flat refusal at home! Not quite sure what to do with the attitude! Ha