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Original poster

Feeling forced to leave my baby

69 replies

Gemc8905 · 13/09/2020 07:02

My baby is 8months old, my partner is being really pushy on me leaving her, as is his family. Iv explained I don’t feel ready, and I won’t be pushed into leaving her..... but now he’s called me pathetic and said I need to grow up..... am I being to clingy?

OP posts:
FippertyGibbett · 13/09/2020 07:03

Leave her where ?
With his family or to go to work ?

HP2020 · 13/09/2020 07:03

Deffo not clingy. How long does he want u to leave baby for

Original poster
Gemc8905 · 13/09/2020 07:17

It would be for a day, with him, while he gets in the beers with his mates..... he’s hardly around anyways so I’m not comfortable with leaving her in that situation. But he has been trying to make me leave her for nights away for a while now. It’s causing a lot of arguments

OP posts:

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Changedmynamelots · 13/09/2020 07:19

I’d do it when you are comfortable, it does make it easier however long term for your dd to be used to you not being there, ie nursery etc.

Have you had any time to yourself since she came? Hair appointments, shopping etc? Child free time is very blissful, but only if you actually want it

Monstamio · 13/09/2020 07:21

He wants you go out and leave the baby with him whilst he gets pissed with his mates? Have I got that right?

Original poster
Gemc8905 · 13/09/2020 07:22

Iv had 1 night out with my partner when bubs was tiny and I wasn’t ready to leave her, but was forced to.... and have a few beauty apps but that’s 20mins max. I don’t want to leave her. I never thought I’d have a baby so yes she is precious to me, and I value our time together so much

OP posts:
Jamhandprints · 13/09/2020 07:24

What's the point? You dont need to if you don't want to.
Do you have anyone you would trust to leave her with if you absolutely had to?
But it doesnt sound like he's being very supportive. Being absent, criticising and insulting you. Can you leave?

Original poster
Gemc8905 · 13/09/2020 07:24

Yes correct, while he is drinking.....

OP posts:
Original poster
Gemc8905 · 13/09/2020 07:26

I would leave her with my parents and 100% trust them.
I wish it was so easy to leave

OP posts:
scrivette · 13/09/2020 07:27

You don't have to leave her until you are ready. I didn't leave any of mine for longer than an hour until I had to go back to work.

ApolloandDaphne · 13/09/2020 07:27

It is madness to leave child with someone who plans to get drunk with his mates. Does he want to take her somewhere, to his mates house or what?

polkadotpixie · 13/09/2020 07:28

I absolutely wouldn't leave my DS with anyone who was drinking, not even DH (his Dad)

Why does he even want you to? Surely he'll have more fun with his mates if he's not on Dad duty

Changedmynamelots · 13/09/2020 07:29

Don’t leave her then, it’s no big deal at all.

Do it when you are ready ☺️

Original poster
Gemc8905 · 13/09/2020 07:29

The guys want the mums to go out for a day, and they have the 5 kids, (3 different families) but the dads all just always drink when together

OP posts:
Soubriquet · 13/09/2020 07:31

Saying you need to go out for a night out is one thing. Even if you were ready

Leaving the baby behind whilst he is getting pissed is something else entirely

I wouldn’t be happy with it either

dementedpixie · 13/09/2020 07:32

Remind him of the rule of 6 - not allowed to have that amount of people in the house at the same time

Original poster
Gemc8905 · 13/09/2020 07:32

I’m not willing to do it. And so he called me pathetic and told me I need to grow up

OP posts:
GCAcademic · 13/09/2020 07:35

He’s the one who needs to grow up. Boozing with his mates when looking after a baby sounds some something a particularly dumb teenage babysitter would do.

Soubriquet · 13/09/2020 07:35

@Gemc8905

I’m not willing to do it. And so he called me pathetic and told me I need to grow up
Well he sounds charming doesn’t he

Has he always been like this or is it getting worse?

serialreturner · 13/09/2020 07:36

Dangerous and now illegal - rule of 6

Original poster
Gemc8905 · 13/09/2020 07:36

If he wants one an one time that’s fine but not pissing up his mates

OP posts:
2beautifulbabs · 13/09/2020 07:36

Tell him to piss off how pathetic of him.
If he's so concerned about having drinks tell him to go out and get drunk with his mates.
You and your DD will be happy at home instead.

Don't be forced into something your uncomfortable with after all your DD is relying on you to look out for her and to have her best interests at heart.

As another PP commented tell him about the no more than 6 people rule and really with the infection rate rising again do you really want to be risking having anyone other than immediate family in your home at this present moment.

Coffeecak3 · 13/09/2020 07:36

If you don't want to leave your baby then that's your choice to make.
Don't feel manipulated into doing anything you don't want.

Notajogger · 13/09/2020 07:36

Sounds like he is the one who needs to grow up! He sounds like a bully.

FelicityPike · 13/09/2020 07:36

Well as of tomorrow, you can’t (if you’re in Scotland or England).
I think it’s strange that if you live together that he hasn’t had more time just him & his baby....BUT absolutely NO WAY would I leave my child with someone so him & his mates can “babysit” & get hammered on beer!!
No way.

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