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Parenting

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Original poster

How often.....

31 replies

Thomcat · 10/10/2004 15:25

How often, as a couple, (so if you are a single parent, often when you were with your partner) do you take your kids out, either to the park, as a family, or to a museum or the zoo or something?

Every weekend?
About once a month?
Once every 6 months or so?

I'm not talking taking them out shopping, I'm talking quality family days out.

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Skate · 10/10/2004 15:28

As a family we do something most weekends even if it's just a trip to the park altogether (having said that dh has gone on his own today cos I'm working ).

Tissy · 10/10/2004 15:28

around once every couple of months...

I was feeling rather pleased with myself today as I'd managed to get dd to play happily for an hour with the telly off. Now I'll get back to the bad mothers' club.

tammybear · 10/10/2004 15:29

me and exp hardly ever took dd out anywhere when we were together. i cant think of one occasion except for town. me and dp now take dd out together to the park at least one of the days when he's staying, unless the weather is horrible.

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suzywong · 10/10/2004 15:32

every weekend
we make an absolute point of it

GeorginaA · 10/10/2004 15:32

I'm embarrassed to say probably only once every other month, but then

a) we are "new" second child parents and haven't quite got into the level of organisation required to take two out (and ds2 doesn't really get the benefit

b) as a result of (a) we're usually exhausted by the weekend and generally our weekends are as slobbish as possible.

c) ds1 seems to have a rush of parties to go to at the moment, so with that and rellies wanting to visit, "free" weekend days are jealously guarded for chores/slobbing/sleeping in.

I'm also a firm believer in kids having time to have free play time not directed by parents. That said, I think there is room for more family outing focus in our lives. Probably when ds2 is 1 year old this will be more feasible more regularly.

GeorginaA · 10/10/2004 15:35

BTW, I don't think taking them out shopping is necessarily bad. Ds1 really gets excited about a trip out to Homebase .

nutcracker · 10/10/2004 15:35

Not very often, about once every couple of mths, which isn't often enough.

nutcracker · 10/10/2004 15:36

I do too GA (trip to homebase i mean)

monkeygirl · 10/10/2004 15:40

Not enough . DH is happy to play with the kids but he just wants to do an intensive session in the park, which I've had enough of by the weekend, and then slob around. I don't mind slobbing out sometimes, but after basically the same old routine all week, I'm ready for a bit more excitement which for me would be nice to share with the family. I'm also worried that dd1 only seems to go out with either dh or me separately except when we are visiting rellies or having a rare holiday.

Original poster

Thomcat · 10/10/2004 15:44

No taking them out shopping isn't bad and can be great fun as well, but as a parent when you take them shopping it's cos you have things to get and you're taking them along. I know shopping is still taking them out and can be fun but I was just interested in how often as a couple people took their kids out for the day for the sole purpose of spending quality fun time together as a family.

I take Lottie out a lot on my own and we go and visit friends and family with her a lot as the 3 of us but I don't think we take her to the zoo, farm, park, museum etc enough as the 3 of us and was interested to know what other people did as a family unit.

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Amfs · 10/10/2004 15:47

I suppose if you average it out about once every couple of months .. but then we kind of have to wait till DH is in a good phase and has the energy to do it

But once we do it, and have a good time, we tend to do it again .. so we'll go out say 3 or 4 weekends on the trott and then not at all for a few months

Personally I don't think its a problem .. when we stay in, we stay in as a family and talk and play and do stuff (again if DH is up to it)

as for shopping .. I get that delivered

suzywong · 10/10/2004 15:48

also at weekends we try and each have a one on one session with each child, but I have to do a lot of nagging and organising to achieve this.

I can't stand taking the kids to any kind of major shop so if we have to go then we turn it in to an outing with DH with a playground or a cafe thrown in,

BTW the Homebase equivalent here as a big playground in side. Very clever.

Skate · 10/10/2004 15:54

We take ours out most weekends, like I say, maybe just to the park but have also done zoo, farm type things but obviously not every week.

However, I do think people can get too hung up on feeling the need to do this - there's nothing wrong with children having time in the home playing or just playing in the garden AND they don't have to be entertained by parents all the time either.

I know that noone is suggesting this but it's just an observation of mine that mothers nowadays do seem to put an awful lot of pressure on themselves to be doing fun, interactive, educational things with their kids all the time (me included!) but kids need to learn to entertain themselves and play among themselves just as much. When we were kids, going on a family day out all together was a serious treat and most of the time we played out in our garden or with friends in the street - it didn't do us any harm and I didn't feel abandoned by my parents.

Of course it's good to do family things too but life is life and it's just not always possible with the other 6000 things you need to catch up with on the weekends.

While I'm on a rant - I also find people feel ashamed to admit their kids watch TV. I agree they don't benefit from 24 hour a day TV being totally ignored but mine watch CBeebies at some point everyday and actually get quite a lot out of it. They learn tons!

sponge · 10/10/2004 16:05

We tend to take it in turns to do the park so that the other one can get on with other things (shopping, household chores etc) otherwise nothing ever gets done. Especially true since we had ds as he's too small to get any benefit from a park or other visit. We do go pretty much every weekend though, weather permitting.
Don't often do the zoo, cinema, museum type stuff - 4 or 5 times a year perhaps.
She does have friends round to play or goes to theirs quite a bit though which is what she likes best.

Earlybird · 10/10/2004 17:26

We go to the park alot - maybe 3 or 4 times per week when the weather is good. There are several good parks in the area, so we can vary where we go, and what we do when we get there, which keeps us both interested. I suppose we utilise parks a great deal more than many as we don't have a garden.

Will probably go more to museums as the weather gets bad....we went to the Victoria & Albert last weekend, and had a great time while the rain came down outside. Frequent museum visits is one way to enjoy central London life, and the effort required for us to go to a museum is pretty minimal as travel time is negligible.

I also tend to take dd out to alot of museums and parks as I enjoy my time with her more that way. We both tend to go stir crazy and get on each other's nerves if we spend too much time alone in the flat.

Jennisaurus · 10/10/2004 17:36

About once a week, but it depends. We try to spend as much time togther as a family as possible, but I sometimes I work weekends

I live round the corner from a beautiful park which makes it easier! We don't go to the zoo much, although we should as she is started to get more interested in things like that.

Heathcliffscathy · 10/10/2004 17:40

every weekend, usually both days. and during the week, i go out with ds at least once a day as otherwise we do both go a bit mad. skate, i think you're right though. ds likes time to just potter and play himself, sometimes there's a danger of being two in your face/going out loads...agree about tv too, but ds isn't into it yet (will be by the time i've finished with him tho!)

florenceuk · 10/10/2004 22:27

On average every two weeks - depending on work pressures/pregnancy (when I was first pregnant I was as sick as a dog and DH and DS made great use of the Science Museum). Today we went to Wisley - packed with kids and grannies.

BTW we hardly ever go shopping with DS - far too stressful and no fun at all for either of us.

eidsvold · 10/10/2004 23:02

we go for breakfast every saturday morning to the beach - play in the park and let dd paddle in the ocean. Sometimes we also go out to visit friends and family - other times head out for dinner ...

however - getting very hot and uncomfortable for me and so not sure how long this will continue and then have to try and get organised with two. Dd loves going visiting and she and dh spend a lot of time playing on the weekend as he does not see her as much during the week.

Skate · 11/10/2004 11:57

Eidsvold - sounds AMAZING!! Where do you live!?!

Twinkie · 11/10/2004 12:04

We do something each weekend - whether it is a walk to the local park or to Knowle Park to see the Reinydeer (like we did yesterday - didn't fancy walking but the Nstional Trust Cream Teas lure me there!!) or even to the Local Caff (as DD puts it so nicely) for breakfast as a family.

throckenholt · 11/10/2004 12:08

at least every day at the weekend - often during the week as well. Usually it is just a walk in the woods, rarely to an attraction like a zoo.

prettycandles · 11/10/2004 20:11

My dh has an obsession that we have to go out and 'do' something every Sat and Sun. I dearly want the occasional weekend when we just stay in and don't do much at all - read the newspaper, play with the children, watch a video together... But we do family stuff every weekend, and during the week if dh has time off work. On our summer holiday we did something revolutionary (for dh anyway): we each had one child for one day or half-day - a real change for me as I always have both of them.

prettycandles · 11/10/2004 20:12

And for dh, I suppose, as he rarely has any of the children without me along too!

hovely · 11/10/2004 22:01

we have just started an arrangement where we 'split shifts' for one day a weekend - so for example on Saturday I look after dd and ds from 9-12 then DH does it from 2-5, we do mealtimes and bedtime together. 3 hours each to do whatever we want to, no critical remarks from other parent ; then on the other day eg Sunday we try to go out somewhere all together. I am always trying to get to somewhere interesting like a farm or museum, but DH says understandably that he has been commuting all week and just wants to go to the park, whereas I will have taken DS and DD to the park 3 times that week already. I think it is essential to get out of the house every day, but it doesn't have to be too ambitious. I actually think it can be easier to look after fractious children away from the house, we all feel a bit calmer, and fortunately both dd and ds sleep OK in the pushchair.

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