Lockdown has sent my mind into overdrive - every day for the past few weeks I have been thinking ALOT about whether to try for a 2nd baby. My little boy is 18 months, I’m 39 (40 later this year) and, up until very recently, I was most definitely “one and done”. My husband, on the other hand, would like a 2nd but has always said no pressure if I don’t want to.
My little boy is a happy soul, has always been a great sleeper (maybe I have just jinxed it now!) but I still find motherhood absolutely exhausting. I feel irritable a lot of the time, just from exhaustion I think. I’m not sure if it’s because I’m older or if this is how I would’ve felt anyway if I was younger.
The one girl I became friends with from antenatal class just had her 2nd baby last week and 2 good work colleagues both announced pregnancies in the space of a week and these are what I seem to be fixated on. I’m not entirely sure why. It’s almost like I felt we were all equal and now I’m being left behind as they’re having a 2nd baby....if that even makes sense!
If I was younger I feel I could put it to bed for a bit and decide further down the line if we want to try but I have overwhelming feeling of the clock is ticking due to my age.
Did anyone else feel like this? If you did have a 2nd, would you mind sharing how you truthfully coped? Or if you decided to just have 1, did you have any regrets further down the line?
I just feel it’s such a huge life decision and it’s all I can think about just now.