Rooming in....what are your views?

[dal21]

Hi everyone - my LO is 9 days old (PFB) and before he arrived i was pretty sure i was going to follow the guideline of having his cot with us for 6 months. now that he is here, i am already wanting to move him into his nursery (which is right across from our bedroom so very close). he makes so many noises when asleep that it is stopping me from getting a good quality of sleep betweeen feeds.

what are all your opinions? what did you do? is the rooming in really that important?

I would do what you feel is best for you and your family, if you think you will get more sleep i would move him at the end of the day the better quality of sleep you have the better you will cope when you have to be awake so imo it's worth it. Why not try it for a few nights and see how you feel?

There is lots of evidence that shows that babies need to sleep near to adults in order to be safe - being near an adult's body (preferably right next to one) regulates their breathing, heart rate, hormones, temperature all before they are physically mature enough to do it consistently for themselves. If you're not sleeping well, why not bring him into your bed so you can feed him while you sleep? Unless your bottle feeding which wouldn't work so well like that for obvious reasons! His sleeping will improve and only you can make the decision as to whether or not to move him. If you are really suffering from no sleep then he wouldn't be very safe in the daytime being cared for by an over-exhausted mother so it's about weighing up each risk and deciding which one is worse.

DD slept in with us (first in our room then in our bed) until she was about 3.

Ds however slept in our room until he was about 4 months then went into his own room.

Ds is now almost 3 & dd almost 6 & every morning we wake up with one, if not both, of them in our bed!

DS1 was 8 weeks old when he went into his own room (drove me nuts, snoring and generally making a lot of noise). He slept FAR better on his own.

DS2 was 14 weeks when he went into his own room. He slept dismally until he was 8 months old.

DD was 12 weeks old when she went into her own room. I am so paranoid now though that she has an apnoea monitor, so if anything goes wrong in the night an alarm will sound.

I am not one for sleeping with the kids in bed. I just can't sleep and they don't sleep well either. There were lots of instances when we travelled around the world last year when we had to bedshare and it always meant a bad nights' sleep.

Will you be able to hear your LO before he works himself up into a lather if he was in his own room or would you need a baby monitor to hear him before he gets really upset and starts screaming enough to wake you up.

If you think you might not hear him before he gets too upset and you would need a monitor then you might as well keep him in your room as that is just as much of an irritation as listening to all his gurgles and noises whilst he is there and at least you don't have to wander around the house in the middle of the night.

I think as you become more settled you will sleep through the unimportant noises and only wake for the ones that need attention.

Agree with lindenlass that the evidence is that it is better for the baby to be in the same room with adults.

I personally find it easier having DS2 in the room with me, though he is in his moses basket. Just that getting up and feeding him in the night is less disruptive if he is near me(he is FF). DS2 is probably going to move into his own room in a week or so when he is about 4 months. However I do know lots of people who have put LO in their own rooms at a very young age especially if it is very close by.

I completely get what you say about the baby making lots of noise in the night and disturbing your sleep even if they are not feeding. From 0-7 weeks I was awake at every little sound until I discovered EARPLUGS. DH can sleep through little sounds and he just nudged me when he needed feeding. Alternatively I have a friend who just wears one earplug which dulls some of the sound but not all of it. It does get better, DS2 has slept soundly at night without the noises since he was about 10 weeks.

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Thanks guys for the advice. I didnt really realise how much he was affecting my sleep til my mum took him in with her for the last few nights. But I think some of you are right; it just wouldnt feel right not having him sleep in the room with me (or someone else i trust).
Will persevere with it for another couple of weeks - and see what happens. Earplug in one ear may be a very good compromise. The good news is since we have had him in the ambybaby - he settles back to sleep if he wakes up very quickly.

thanks everyone - much appreciated!

DS1 was in with us for months and months. But when ds2 came along I couldn't sleep with him in the room: he was such a noisy snuffler, shuffler, etc.

I moved him in with his brother when he was tiny - less than 6 wks I think! He was fine, much happier in there, ds1 (23 months) slept better than ever with him in there, and I certainly did!

we put DS in his own room from 2wks old- i couldn't get any sleep with him in the same room, and our house is small, so with him in his room next door, and the doors open, i could hear the littlest cough, but wasn't kept so awake.

mine slept in his own room from birth

thanks all. I have been searching for the stats behind why the FSID publish the guidelines they do. i.e. how much does it increase the risk my not having them in the room with you. very difficult to make an educated decision not knowing how they have arrived at their conclusions. I guess all this comes down to as many of you have said is doing what feels right. And following maternal instinct. My aunt told me last night that during her pregnancies advice on everything from sleeping positions to eating etc changed with each one!