Ok, help me get through this week!!!

[Jennifer8]

Single parent with four year old starting reception this week (not too resistant THANK GOODNESS!)Mornings only and is a nightmare in the afternoons because he's knackered. But his uniform is getting mucky on a daily basis, I can't keep up, have a 13 week old as well, my house is a tip and my parents have gone away till next week...so we have to feed their cat twice a day as well as no Grandma around! (She is a gem and I do not begrudge her a holiday )

Baptism of fire, I have not had a routine since I was about 9

How do you all do it!!!!

Wht sort of a uniform does he have? Can you buy cheapie polo shirts from Asda so you have more stock? DS is doing slightly better atm because I am still sending him in shorts, so there is less of them to get mucky, and, if they are not too bad, I sponge them off. I have been sending him in a sweatshirt but I don't know why because it always returns screwed up in his book bag.

Everyone always recommends getting everything ready the night before. So I would do that. Presumably he doesn't need much more than uniform just now. Then it sounds like he needs to maybe have a bit of a run round (or maybe a walk to Grandma's) after school and then a quiet afternoon.

As for morning routine, I do not allow the TV on at all (although some people use it as a signal or an incentive). On my non working days (which are more applicable to you) the children are usually up about 7, breakfast at 7.30, then up to wash, teeth, dress and then play until it is time to go to school. This gives loads of time. How long does it take you to walk to school?

Afraid the answer's in your post. Think routine is the key. If his uniform is grubby, as soon as he gets home, get into the habit of taking it off and washing it, and then drying it in the evening for the next day.
Feeding the cats: could you go over as soon as you've dropped him off at school. Do they really need feeding twice a day? OUrs get a top up of dried food every morning. Or when we go away, my mother comes over once a day at most and puts loads of food down. Alternatively, if they do need twice daily feeding, could you pick your ds up, go home, put washing on, give him a bit of chill out time, and then go and feed just before you come back and give tea/supper. Then bath, bed for him. Drying clothes, making sure everything prepared for the next day before you go to bed.
Am kind of ignoring your younger dc as at that age my younger one was kind of fitting in with what I had to do to get older dc through the day (from necessity).
It's only for a short time, and you will fall into a routine that suits.
The top tip is to prepare everything needed for the next morning the night before.
Good luck!

All get up at 7.30 at latest if baby not awake have a bath then give your ds breakfast while you change and feed baby, sit baby in bouncy chair while you get you and ds ready to leave the house leaVE 10MINS BEFORE YOU REALLY HAVE TO AND ASK FOR DS TO PUT HIS SHOES ON 10MINS BEFORE HE REALLY NEEDS TO. (sry caps)

When you get back from school have a cup of tea and cuddle baby if not sleeping, if baby has fallen asleep in pushchair have a 10min tidy then have a cuppa.
Go and feed the cat.
At about 11ish feed baby and try to ger her down for a longish nap while you stick dinner in the slow cooker, perhaps put some washing on, have a rest.
When you pick ds up have lunch and let him rest, let him watch tv, read books, colour, cuddles etc
When baby has late afternoon nap put dinner on (say you put bolognaise in the slow cooker this is where you could put pasta on, wash up get washing out of machine etc)
At 6pm bath them both give baby bedtime feed read story then get them in bed.
7pm put your feet up with a glass of wine/ cuppa and MN!!

Ok so it probably wont go as smoothly as this but you can have a go at it and see how it goes, not the end of the world if you dont hoover etc etc maybe when you parents get back they could take the dc's for a few hours and you can catch up on some cleaning and rest then. Don't stress over it this week you have enough going on!

Have you any friends who can come over and watch dc's if you need a nap (say if you've been up in the night alot)

Just keep on top of the basics like feeding, eating (nothing wrong with beans on toast etc) and washing up.

use the flylady technique -pick the thing which annoys you the most,and focus on that(say keeping on top of the washing up, or hoovering the living room), and deliberately ignore the rest (unless obvious health hazard ).
And agree with everyone else - do as much as possible the night before, one load of washing a day after DS comes home from school (to include school uniform, plus one clean outfit for everyone, that should be about a load?), easy food (beans on toast, pasta etc).
Work out the latest you can possibly leave the house in the morning, and take 10 minutes before that as your "leaving time". Then work backwards (how long for breakfast, how long to get dressed, how long to brush teeth) which will tell you when you need to get up.

Thanks so much, everyone who has answered. I have read all your suggestions and there are some brilliant ones in there, I am really grateful

Sorry I didn't reply earlier, it was fraught...seems that as soon as I've dropped DS1 at school, and done some other errand on the way back (using my mum's car I just collapse with DS2 stuck to my breast, and can't seem to move...I try to do some cleaning up but DS2 makes a squark and I have to stop again...

Then go to get DS1 and he climbs out of his seat on the way home (every single day) and if not sticking his head out the window, will get under the seats. Usually somewhere it's impossible to pull over.

Then we get home and he sometimes falls asleep, sometimes just is tired and clumsy and silly all afternoon. When he finally drops off at some odd hour, it's time to feed the cat or else DS2 wakes up. Nothing gets done! The frustration is enormous isn't it?
Oh and then DS1 wakes again and decides to get a hammer and smash all my flower pots.

Hooray, they are both quiet! Quick, Mumsnet!!!

Thanks again x I feel better just ranting about it.

you couold egt one of these just to make your life a tiny bit easier and to make your ds safer? just an idea.

LMG that is really thoughtful, thanks . I think I have a padlock somewhere

have you tried a sling for DS2?

Is it possible to insist on a proper nap for DS at a set time (just after lunch?) so that you know where you are?

So glad to hear of someone else in the same situation! I have 1 year old twins and no good routine either... I have loads of washing, the wahing up to do, the flat is a tip, and I'm still not dressed! but on the up side my babies are fed clean and happy so the rest will just have to wait....