Coronavirus Ruining Maternity Leave

[HollyT89]

I'm so upset - I feel like the virus is ruining my maternity leave. My family and I have been lucky so far and we're all fit and healthy (other than my asthma), but I'm devastated that it looks that I won't be spending maternity leave with my first and only baby as I'd imagined (already 3 months in)
I'm trying to rationalise that it won't change things that much, but I can't help how I'm feeling.
Is anyone else feeling the same way?

Why won't you be spending it with your baby?

It’s shit. I was loving all our baby groups, swimming, seeing friends and family every day. Now home on our own until back to work it seems. So boring!
I know we have to be grateful etc etc but it is still shit, I had so many social things planned and my parents are going to miss so much

@AntMansVan I will be spending it with my baby - I just mean that it won't be spent in the way I'd imagined.

@Megan2018 Such a shame isn't it?!  Although I'm so grateful that my family are okay.

One of my baby groups is being set up to be streamed live through FB! Maybe contact the organisers and see if they have any plans? Organisers of paid classes will be keen to do what they can to keep them going because they (rightly) don't want to lose out on their income. It's not the same as meeting in person but allows you to keep your routine and set activities

I feel exactly the same! I am in a country where we are on lockdown so we can't leave the house. I envisaged the nice weather arriving and us out every day doing all the lovely things I've been looking forward to my whole life. Now it looks like this lockdown will continue and I'll be back at work having spent most of my mat leave cooped up inside and my poor baby staring at these 4 walls. Also my first and only baby.

I'm totally in favour of containing this virus and I'm so fortunate that it hasn't yet affected any loved ones. I know this is really nothing to complain about in the grand scheme of things. At the same time, I'm disappointed that my baby and I won't be allowed out the house for, potentially, the next few months.

I'm the same. Had lots of plans for maternity leave and unlikely to be able to do any of them :(

I know exactly how u feel. I've got a baby girl who is just over 3 weeks old, I spent 9 days in hospital before her birth and 6 after. I was really looking forward to getting out and about and doing nice things.
I do feel like it's putting a downer on maternity leave however I'm extremely greatful that we're both well and I'm pleased that I don't have to be in hospital as things are getting worse by the day.

My baby is 8 months. I've only got 4 months left so the rest of mine will probably be spent dealing with this epidemic. And I also have the fun of worrying about what happens to my job if this carries on long term.

I felt the same.. although seeing what's happening around the world I'm just grateful we're all still alive and well tbh. Things like that don't really matter to me anymore. With your asthma as well, gthank goodness you're all ok.

TBH I'm massively relieved to be on maternity leave. If my older child's nursery closes then I'm already at home, so that is a lot easier. We financially planned for my mat leave income, so no worrying about dropping pay down to stat sick pay or even nothing. I don't really do baby groups anyway, so not really feeling like I'm missing out on anything there. I have the time at home to batch cook and stock the freezer, so we will have plenty of home cooked food available. If my elderly parents get ill I'm available to help care for them. There are obviously negatives, it's all very unnerving, and I'm so worried for my parents, but I'm trying to see the positives in this situation.

I know how you feel, I’m lucky in that mine is my second but we had just started getting out and about properly (he’s nine weeks old). I was really looking forward to meeting people through groups and enjoying the nicer weather with him. Although we are lucky because we have a garden so will still be able to do the latter if this goes on for months.

@katmarie, that’s another thing I’m grateful for - when the schools close, at least I don’t have to worry about our older child.

I understand your sadness, I feel much the same. My baby is due shortly. I am of course grateful for my health, my families health and acknowledge there are worse positions to be in. But I feel a great deal of sadness that our family & friends won’t be able to celebrate our babies arrival with us (I have an underlying condition so no visitors are advised). And that we won’t be able to see our lovely friends for play dates, go to fantastic baby classes I so enjoyed with my daughter. I found maternity leave very isolating despite all the classes etc we did last time. Being stuck not able to go anywhere really does worry me re-mental health. I’ve also now got a bonkers toddler to consider who isn’t old enough to understand why suddenly we can’t to softplay or swimming or the library or the park! The safety net of her nursery routine that she loves is likely to change. The break & one on one time with my new DD I was going to get from DD1 going to nursery is looking unlikely.

It’s all just bit crappy. But trying to stay positive & think of everything we have to be grateful for! This will peak and then get better. Life will resume normality & I will certainly will never take my freedom to live life for granted again!

It also means you aren't having to go out and about to work though, you can keep your baby safe far easier than if you were relying on childcare so you could go out and pay the bills. It's crap for everyone, but these things will reopen and you will have the chance to do them then.

@Butterwhy they won’t reopen until I’m back at work. This is my only baby and I’ll be back to a demanding job (main earner so no choice) with no time to go to anything as baby will be at nursery 7.30-6.

Obviously health of everyone is far more important and we’ll survive it but I’m still gutted. I live very rurally so will have no-one to talk to or see for days at a time as all my family are hours away and DH works very long shifts. That’s very isolating. I’m sure my baby doesn’t care but I’m not sure how my mental health will hold up.

I can’t even walk as everywhere still flooded and impassable.

My 93 year old grandmother meant to meet my baby this weekend, obviously not possible now. Odds of her meeting her ever pretty bleak. My grandmother sobbed down the phone earlier. Heartbreaking.

I feel the same

It doesn't help but you're definitely not alone. My daughter is 4 weeks and I was looking forward to starting all of the baby groups and taking her swimming. I also feel like I'm wasting my maternity leave. But like everyone else, I'm extremely glad that so far my friends and family are ok and if we all follow the advice this should all be contained quicker.

Walks walks walks! Excellent for mental health and absolutely no reason why you can’t do that (unless you have symptoms of course).
My DS has his settling in at nursery this week and I’m due back at work next month - if his planned nursery closes I have no idea what I’ll do!!! But it could be a lot worse.

Yes walking is the best thing that we are allowed to do (unless we are showing symptoms). I've just got back from one and it does help

I'm on mat leave too , I was loving groups and meeting new people but staying at home is a small price to pay. We've just got to suck it up. There are people who are much, much worse than us. We can still enjoy time with our babies

I totally understand where your coming from I feel the same. Although I’m glad we are all healthy so far it’s very isolating in the house with a small baby. I’m back to work in June if I’m not asked to go back before that. Fingers crossed this will be in the past soon and the death rate isn’t as high as predicted. I had my first little girl during the swine flu epidemic. Maybe I should just not have anymore babies 🙄

I was feeling the same but trying to stay positive and thinking of all the nice walks I can take my baby on, maybe try some new hobbies, and one of the classes I go to that’s been cancelled are looking to get online so maybe worth looking into.
And also extremely grateful to be on mat leave as I’m an A&E nurse and feeling so sorry for all my lovely work friends

We're all miserable, OP.

My pension is screwed.

My frail dad could die & be impossible for me to get to to say goodbye.
DC's exams are disrupted.
I'll go spare if forced to stay at home (French/Italian/Spanish style)
I've got a work problem brewing related to #covid.
I'm better just now but this morning my last nerve was about to fray.

@Megan2018 could you what's app call her so she can meet the baby via video? That would at least be something.

I'm constantly videoing my mum nan and grandad as they live 4 hours away but I want them to see me LO as much as possible.