Coronavirus Ruining Maternity Leave

[HollyT89]

I'm so upset - I feel like the virus is ruining my maternity leave. My family and I have been lucky so far and we're all fit and healthy (other than my asthma), but I'm devastated that it looks that I won't be spending maternity leave with my first and only baby as I'd imagined (already 3 months in)
I'm trying to rationalise that it won't change things that much, but I can't help how I'm feeling.
Is anyone else feeling the same way?

petition.parliament.uk/petitions/306691?fbclid=IwAR0liB0HGvDIyek9ZmYy043rq2WG5FOwwUFiddWvv-pduOZHFIcXn5upxzQ

Hi everyone,

I am brand new here and after reading this thread have joined especially to share the petition above with you.
I am currently on maternity leave and while I am incredibly grateful for my health and that of my family and fully support the lockdown measures; I share the same feelings of sadness and worry at what my 8 month old son has missed out on due to lockdown. Socialising with other children, walks in the park, going swimming, bonding with family etc etc.
If we all sign the petition and at the bottom of the page leave comments as to the effects it has had, perhaps UK maternity leave will be extended to give us all a chance to catch up on the experiences we feel we've missed, once it's safe again. We need a bit of extra time off work now; the maternity leave equivalent of a mortgage holiday I guess!

@Oaky260

Sorry I think this petition is absolutely ridiculous

I think the free dental care for new mothers should be extended

Isn’t that the same petition that got fairly comprehensively torn to shreds above?

It’ll take well over a year to reach “once it’s safe again”. Do you propose we are all off work (paid) for the next 1-2 years? Or that after we go back we’re allowed an additional xx months off randomly once everyone in the country has been vaccinated?

I agree it’s a bit shit, i never planned to be home schooling my 4 yr old whilst breastfeeding my 5-month old, but i’m realistic enough to know that stamping my foot and shouting “it’s not FAIR” serves no purpose beyond catharsis. Your child can (should?) still be having walks in the park, and swimming isn’t a compulsory activity (dd1 didn’t swim until her lessons at 2.5 - she’s a perfectly happy swimmer now), and the socialising will happen when the risks are reduced regardless of whether we’re on leave or not.

Taking additional leave when my child is 18 months is not going to retrospectively make right now less shit, nor is it going to help future-me who will need full pay rather than unbudgeted additional smp and future-dd2 who will at that point be drowning in grandparental cuddles, nursery, activities and general fun socialising. This is what it is. We have to find the joy in what we have right now.

I'm on maternity leave (DS is 4 months) and really I'm quite grateful this has all happened while I'm on mat leave... if I wasnt on mat leave I'd have to go into work (NHS) and really, lockdown isn't that bad with a small baby, I was spending my maternity leave before lockdown mostly cocooned at home.
Yeah, it would be nice to go out and do baby sensory like I did with DD but mostly I feel grateful I'm off work anyway and my pay isn't affected

The petition is one of the most opportunist, grasping attempts I've seen all week... women on maternity leave are probably the most minimally groups of people affected by lockdown out there

Oh god. Not the petition again?! It's such a bad idea.

I also think that petition is the most ridiculous and missing the point thing I have ever seen.

@loreleigilmore28

I feel the same and also NHS. I feel guilty not working, but so grateful I'm home with my baby.

Plus we do our groups online x

The petition is such a bad idea, and reflects a level of self-absorption that completely misses the point of what lockdown is about, and price tag of the economic hit that comes with it.

You've not been 'lucky' in not getting it. You have benefitted from the lockdown in controlling it, flattening the transmission rate, and keeping medical care available. All sorts of people on all sorts of circumstances (including very vulnerable ones) have had to curtail activities, including ones which affect their MN.

Now perhaps we are going to see a spike in PND. In which case I would urge people to get in touch with their HV or GP now. Proper RL support is going to be important, and even if provision is not fully in place at the moment, it will at least get you on the radar and they may be able to signpost online resources.

Everyone, regardless of the age of their families, is missing their social life right now.

But Coronavirus is ruining pretty much everything for everyone isn't it? Maybe I should start a petition to have all the fun end of Year 6 stuff my son is missing out on reinstated? Or perhaps one to stop the industry I work in from being shot to pieces for the foreseeable future?

Many people would rather have been in lockdown on maternity leave than trying to work from home with a small child because childcare is closed. Also I can guarantee you it won't matter to your 5 month old that you didn't go to baby groups. You can read books, sing etc at home and parents are all they need at that age. Yes they enjoy other things. They also enjoy having a bath (some of them!) or banging a cup on the floor. Baby groups are for the parents. It's tough being stuck at home with a young baby, but it's also tough being stuck at home in many other scenarios.

Yeah, it would have been more convenient for me for lockdown to have been last year when I was on maternity leave, instead of this year when I’m trying to home school my 6 and 4 year olds, look after my 16 month old and do my work at the same time, while also keeping them all quiet as DH is working from home.

@HollyT89 I feel exactly the same - DS2 is now 5 months old and the first few months I spent with builders in the house (not peaceful) and after lockdown have been as chief cook of multiple meals a day / teacher / childminder. DS2 is an an angel and I feel so bad he’s not prioritised while my demanding DS1 takes the bulk of attention. I feel I’m missing out on him being a little baby while all this is going on.

I'm on maternity leave with a 4 month old, my first. This petition is, quite frankly, stupid. You can do baby groups online for the activities, the social aspect of the meet up groups are entirely for the parents benefit when the babies are young. Yes I miss my family, but it's not like new mums are the only demographic missing relatives right now. Sheesh.

That petition is unbelievable! How vapid and self-absorbed can you get?!

honestly yabu because this is the closest thing to maternity leave i've ever experienced

Stupid fucking petition (and yes I am on maternity leave)

@Artesia your post is frankly rather rude. I never said I supported the petition - I was just having a bit of a moan about my FEELINGS. It’s stressful and sometimes we need to let off steam. Sorry I didn’t realise we weren’t allowed to express ourselves!!!!

I apologise for misreading your post as being in support of the petition.

I totally understand. My husband and I had been trying for a baby for 3 years. In the end we had IVF on the NHS. I've spent so long dreaming about being pregnant and doing lovely things on maternity leave. On the actual day I had my fertilised egg put in, my mum came as my husband couldn't get out of work as it is the nature of his job. My mum came to so many of my appointments bless her and was my best friend . on my 5th month of pregnancy, I unexpectedly lost my mum. I've been so devastated and in utter shock. Pregnancy is when I needed my mum the most and I lost her. The only thing that was getting me through was having my little girl and spending lovely times with her on maternity. I love my little girl more than anything. She is 3 months old now but I just cannot believe this has happend. I'm grateful that we are all ok of course, but i just want the hardship to end.

@Loz1988

@Loz1988 so sorry to hear about your mum, that’s awful. When I lost my father, my baby got me through it. Your mum will be looking out for you and your bubba from wherever she is now