If you could go back and do the fist year again...parenting regret!

[FeeFee382]

If you could go back and do the first year again what would you change?

Take more photos. I have lots of DD1 but really not many of the others.

Never listen to a health visitor.

Just knowing that I will survive and it will get better would be helpful, but I can hand on heart say I’d NEVER want to go back and do it all over again!!

Not put so much pressure on myself to exclusively breastfeed. Looking back the first 6 months would have been much more positive if I could have adopted the mindset of 'fed is best' rather than 'breast is best'.

I'd hire a nanny. Two nannies, one for day one for night. Even if I had to sell my husband to do it. Maybe a cleaner as well.

I feel bad about selling my husband.

You do what you need to do to get through @Socalm!

Have fewer visitors so early on. Spend more time holding at newborn age. Not have any visitors in the hospital. Been more assertive with less than satisfactory maternity ward experience (put down to exhaustion following a 4 day labour followed by emcs, all the while with no sleep). Have people keep an eye on me while I slept with baby on me during the day rather than them look after baby while I went to bed to catch up sleep between feeds. And many more I can't think of right now I imagine

Im only 4 months in and I'm not sure if I'd go as far as selling my husband, but I'd definitely rent him out for long periods of time to be able to go back and offer a bottle early on.

Not fret about small issues and make them larger in my head than they needed to be. Keep reminding myself, Will this matter in three months' time? Six months? A year? Five years? Example: So, the baby didn't nap today - is it REALLY that much of a problem?

Pleased to say I did manage this with the second I didn't have the time quite frankly

I don't know. Just enjoy it again and soak it all in really. It was a fab time.

Go back to work much sooner.

I think I did a fairly decent job tbh. Maybe spend less time on my phone when she's napping- I'm a tad concerned about the effect on my eyes long term.

6 months in here and no regrets yet! Loving it, had a great pregnancy and birth and have found it pretty easy on the whole. Exhausting yes, and the first 6 weeks BF were draining but it’s all good here

DD doesn’t nap in the day really, we bed share, she has to be held/carried pretty much always and EBF (no bottles) so it’s full on. But had brilliant MW and HV support and not had anything to worry about really. I just seem to trust my instincts. Being older definitely helps on the confidence part.

I honestly never get how much people go on about the first year. I found the following years much , much harder. Toddlers are a million times more difficult than babies and I didn’t have all easy babies.
For the third I got wise and enjoyed it a lot more pre walking as once my kids were on the move it was bye, bye sitting around watching boxsets , being able to sit and eat etc, I even decorated the house when my 2nd was a baby because once they are toddlers I’m not able to do anything 🤷‍♀️

Stayed in the hospital when nurses noted I strughled to breastfeed a d tried to help. Be more insistent with HVs that LO had tongue tie about 4 weeks in when breast feeding didn't improve and all hell btoke loose with constant colicky gassy behavior.

Its my biggest regret leaving the hospital despite advise, but I waas exhausted, felt imprisoned and wanted out.

Then, as a new mother, I was so iunsure of myself that whenever I suggested tongie tie to any professional, I'd take their word that it wasn't the case. After 4 months of a dreadful quality of life for both me and my son, I got it cut privately and life inproved for us massively.

You live and learn.

I'd do co-sleeping from the start with all of them.

I honestly never get how much people go on about the first year

Then thank your lucky stars you didn’t have such a difficult baby as some of us did. It was literally hell for me!
Silver lining though is that any stage since then, although they have their tough or tricky moments, I’ve found have been WAY easier. It’s nice I got the worst bit out the way first.

Not listen to the NCT who said breastfeeding doesn't hurt if you're doing it correctly. It bloody does (for some women). Crack breastfeeding lying down. Co-sleep. Nap with baby whenever possible, sod having a tidy house. Eat more biscuits and watch more box sets. Put less pressure on myself generally.

I learnt all these lessons with DS1 so was a lot less stressed with the next two as newborns (but unfortunately had toddlers to contend with at that point so less napping action...)

Not have a baby in a country where you only get six weeks' maternity leave. I think six months would be perfect.

I'd stop fretting about sleep and just accept the night wakings without spending time trying to figure out why? Why? Why??

What would you change, OP?

Seek treatment for my postnatal depression.
Stop worrying if my body would ever be normal again.
Quit contact with ex best friend who did nothing but mum shaming me from pregnancy on.

The only thing I regret is not getting rid of DSs father immediately.

As for everything else I was 21 and so young amd carefree I really just winged the whole thing and didn't worry about it. I let my instincts lead me and my instincts were right.

I had an incredibly easy baby. My sister says he sensed I was a very young first time mother and his survival instincts kicked in

Eat less biscuits