here are the current problems i have with my 2 under 5, any advice most welcome

[hermykne]

bedtime
has always been 8pm, dd who has just started school is so wound up come 7pm she finds it really hard to relax to sleep and shes out ofthe bed maybe 3 times before i finally get cross.
jammies on at 7/7.30 then a little play and supper to bed with one story each.
she doesnt want to end the game (which could go on for hours - tongiht it was a school day out on the bus, in the garden, back inside, trip to the shops....busy girl)
so i can see shes tired but she admantly refuses to come to bed.
have explained why she needs to go to bed etc, chatted about it in the morn and she tells me promptly i promise to go when u tell me mummy. her little mind is full of confusion.

no 2 problem
dinners- i cook something nice every day and i am fed up with refusals. i am trying to give a varied diet but ds is turning in a terrible fusspot (after always eating for me). tonight he got no dinner and its still sitting there, and he got nothing else, he found some left over apple from earlier on and ate that, hardly engouh. they are so unkeen to try anything different and wont go for bigger bits of stuff if u know what i mean.

any ideas most welcome

Off the top of my head - cut out the pre-bed playing. It's not getting her in the mood for sleep. Give her her supper earlier, bath/pyjamas afterwards, half an hour reading books in a room with dimmed lighting, bed.

Fussy eaters - no idea, sorry. Have that problem myself!

I think you need to bring bedtime forward -it sounds like she's getting overtired? Especially with just starting school.

Don't stress about the food, really, don;t.

They do go thorugh phases (how old is DS?).

After eating only carrots and peas since forever, DS has recently decided he likes babycorn and sprouting brocolli.

I think - hope - we are coming out of the very restricted, suspicious phase

I'd do what policywonk says too- cut out the playing.or let her play before she has a bath and gets into pyjamas, that way she will know that pyjamas mean bed. Had similar probs with dd1 and She hates going to bed.. now she is allowed to sit up and read in bed quietly to make her tired.

don't know about the fussy eating

this book helps

soothing music before bed, same cd every night builds an association between the sounds and getting ready for sleep.

food: don't make an issue of it, he'll eat if he's hungry, but if he realises it's an issue he'll use it as a control thing.

Can only talk about fussy eaters, but I found it quite helpful to do a search (on MN I mean) for fussy eating and felt quite reassured.

Mine are nearly 4 (DS) and DD 7 months. DS goes to bed around 7pm DD at around 6.45. I would definitely bring the bedtime forwards if you can. She might be getting overtired.

The thing about food, I sympathise so much with you here, it's dreadful, but it doesn't last forever and our Paediatrician told me to make sure he was getting enough fluid rather then food as he isn't underweight.

Not much else to offer but sympathy really

thanks all
will try to bring bedtime forward and maybe do jammies closer to actual getting into bed time.
its the " i m not tired" rant i get when shes just bog eyed.

yes i know the fussy eater will sort out but i wish he'd surprise me and say "yes mum, chicken pie yum"
........................

DD has been refusing to go to bed in the summer with the light nights so what we do is bath her and pjs on etc at 7.30 to 8pm ish and then she can play in her room but not come out, after 30 mins we go and tuck her into bed but generally find by that time shes already got into bed and is asleep.

Could you just recommend that she lays in bed and reads to herself and you will keep the light on for 10/15 mins but if she gets up and starts messing about the kight goes out and its sleep straight away.