How do you feel about surprise visitors?

[ClaireT1308]

Okay so I need some advice..
My husbands grandparents have always been the type of people to just show up at our house to visit.
This bothered me but I never said anything until our baby was born and we both feel like a courtesy call would be appreciated! Now she is four months and we just would like a text to ask if they can come round and to give us a rough time in case we are out or busy.
One time they showed up and we weren’t in, and they got mad at us because they wasted a journey!
So my husband said to his grandparents can you give us notice when you are wanting to visit or at least call first! They took extreme offence to this and are now not speaking to us. They have said why should they have to let us know since they are family!
Are we wrong/is this unreasonable?

YANBU. I hate it when people just call in without notice. We had a relative who'd randomly turn up who lived a couple of hours away. He didn't drive, so came by bus. Every few months, he'd just appear at the front door. Because he'd come so far, we couldn't just turn him away or cut short his visit. We'd feel duty bound to make him a meal (lunch or tea) and then drive him back to the bus station to get his bus back home. Sometimes, he didn't show up until late afternoon, so by the time he'd had his tea and we'd caught up, he'd have missed the last bus home and OH would feel duty bound to drive him to the next town to get a train back home. Trouble was, he was a really nice bloke and was a pleasure to be around, always brought presents with him, etc., but never got the subtle hints that we'd rather his visits were planned as we'd literally have to drop everything and abandon our own plans when he appeared. I'm sure that some times he'd have come and we wouldn't have been in, but he never mentioned it if that had happened.