Taking children out of school for 3 weeks

[Goodtimesagain]

I am getting married the last weekend in August next year and would like to take our children on honeymoon with us late September for three weeks, has anybody taken their children out of school for this long before? I appreciate I will have to pay a fine, just wondering if the consequences could be worse? I just want to hear other people’s experiences of taking children out of school for this long...

Leave the children behind with other parent (if not your stbDH), or with grandparent coming to stay, or even pay a nanny to come in and stay for 3 weeks.

No, no, no shame here: read your own posts back to yourself , OP. You want to do what you want to do when you want to do it. I see you're looking at other dates now, which is a sensible move. but your tone was very much one of I'm not bothered whether this is right or wrong, just how much trouble could I be in?

As I said I personally think Heads should have the discretion to authorise 2 weeks. People have family across the world, people should be able to have a once-in-a-lifetime-trip.

I never wanted a wedding in August, that was the date we could get! My children would and frequently talk about how much they would love the honeymoon! I have no educational concerns with my children they are currently flying ahead. I am very concerned though hence the whole post! Or is that not apparent? How much time did you miss of school or are you just being deliberately obtuse

Oh it's so gross stop calling it a honeymoon, children do not go on a honeymoon 🙈

Can I be nosy and ask where you’re going?

I’d talk to the schools to be honest to get the reality of taking them out in September. I have two kids with Sen and term time holidays would be easier for them as it wouldn’t be as busy I know settling back in would be hard. We didn’t have a honeymoon and to be honest it’s not a huge deal as you’re taking the kids so it’s more a family holiday.

I never wanted a wedding in August, that was the date we could get! we'll obviously the fact that you had to have that venue and we're forced into an August wedding against your will makes it fine to let the kids miss 3 weeks of school...

We are not 100% set on anywhere at the moment, we have lots of options. Comments like yours Are really helpful. I was looking for like people’s actual experiences instead of peoples opinions, I did think about putting that in the original post but I hoped people wouldn’t be so unnecessary. I think I will try for a pre wedding holiday as obviously I am getting quite concerned about it otherwise I wouldn’t of posted in the first place If I wasn’t worrying.

Could you not have the honeymoon before the wedding? So it is in the school holidays 😀

Good plan OP. And I would stop referring to it as a honeymoon, rather a big family holiday. The secondary school DC especially might get quite a ribbing if they happen to mention they were going on their parents honeymoon

Not answering the question, but OP if you’re looking at an exotic destination and want to TTC immediately afterwards make sure you look at places that are Zika-free.

I did it Op, not for a honeymoon but just a holiday. DCs were Yr 7, Yr 5 and Yr 3. It was a few years ago now but they were fine.

The schools didn't like it but given they were the only weeks my workaholic (now) exH was prepared to be away from his precious business and my children didn't get to have holidays as a family I did what I thought was right for us.

They had a blast!

Did you get a fine or anything? I don’t so much mind a fine but coming back to a court summons or something would just be the worse bump down to earth for us all!

Is do it in a heartbeat. Get up to speed on what they will miss and commit to going over it with them in the evenings whilst enjoying your honeymoon. Go for it!

Oh yes must remember zika free as my sister went somewhere that delayed her trying. She now has a lovely 2 month old baby boy

OP - I'm in Dorset too. One of my DC's friends (a couple of years ago) went on a 2-week family holiday during September/October when they were in year 8. They didn't get a fine but were told that if the child missed even one more half-day of school that academic year, the attendance officer would be informed and they would be fined etc.

They also had a child in year 11 (!) who went on the holiday, and they were fined for that child.

So for a 3-week holiday I think you'd be in all sorts of trouble. As someone has already said, their attendance would be below 50% by October half-term and that is social services / prosecution territory.

I definitely wouldn’t do it for a child in year 11. Am I scraping the barrels to wonder about 2 and a half weeks?

It was before the fines were introduced. Iwould just factor the cost of the fines in with the holiday tbh.

It didn't hold them back, they experienced things a classroom just couldn't do. Older two have finished their education now but the youngest is home from Uni for the summer. RG Uni studying Theoretical Physics.....

You know your children!

You don’t seem to think formal schooling is that important. It’s certainly not all about creative writing.
The point is that schools follow a syllabus. Skills are taught and reinforced before being built on. If your kids miss out on three whole weeks of teaching they will be affected.
It’s extremely selfish to go on about the venue you want and the long haul you want etc.

Is do it in a heartbeat. Get up to speed on what they will miss and commit to going over it with them in the evenings whilst enjoying your honeymoon. Go for it!

They will will miss 75 lessons each and there's 3 of them!

School is incredible for children hence they go, I just think for a few weeks there is plenty of other educational tools besides being in a classroom!

It's a great opportunity to plug holes in their learning. Teaching a child 1:1 takes far less time than in a class of 30. If your kids are bright and generally achieving well I wouldn't even hesitate. When again will you get this much time together? That counts for something. My parents took me out for weeks at a time to travel as did DHs parents. We both managed to get advanced degrees. It's ludicrous to think kids can't miss a few weeks of school especially if your committed to doing some learning with them.

If you can wait 3 weeks for the dust to settle, why can’t you wait 3 months and do it over Christmas without impacting their or their classmates education.

And more to the point, why take yours kids on honeymoon. I guess you’ll say because this is a second family and that’s actually pretty admirable that you want to involve them. Technically I went on my dad’s second honeymoon, although we waiting until the summer holidays.

Is there a compromise where you and dH go out for 3 and they join you for part of it, may not work depending on ages

Wolfie, I don’t honestly think acknowledging that a child can miss some schooling and still achieve is not valuing schools.

I mean, to be honest, I learned very, very little in school and I think that is still true of many children. It doesn’t mean I don’t think education matters, just that school is a part of the world and life. However, it’s possible to take a breather.

I’d be more worried about the social aspect myself.

I agree with you, we were taken out of schools to travel and I feel like it’s enhanced our lives greatly. Me and my three brothers and sisters have gone on to achieve so much, most successfully my eldest sister who achieved a first degree at oxford and is currently senior VP for a company working and living in Bermuda (though currently on maternity leave).

We wouldn’t go the first three weeks in September to let the dust settle as I put it, but also as I have said so the children settle into their school years. Unfortunately my fiancé’s job means we can’t go in October or December and as we need money to eat and live I think we are going to have to work around his job too!