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Parenting

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Original poster

Taking children out of school for 3 weeks

157 replies

Goodtimesagain · 19/06/2019 13:29

I am getting married the last weekend in August next year and would like to take our children on honeymoon with us late September for three weeks, has anybody taken their children out of school for this long before? I appreciate I will have to pay a fine, just wondering if the consequences could be worse? I just want to hear other people’s experiences of taking children out of school for this long...

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

NannyR · 19/06/2019 14:42

Why not delay it until October then and take two weeks out of school plus the weeks half term.

StBernard · 19/06/2019 14:42

You keep saying 'we need to try for a baby asap' - why do you need the honeymoon to be a 3 week long haul trip for that? Both my babies were conceived at home! I think you need to be aware that their attendance dropping so low will likely result in involvement from the EWO. Also you will probably be fined per child and per parent so definitely an expensive option! I would not take my dc out for 3 weeks at the start of a new school year. They will miss a lot of the first half term which is important in setting expectations and making friends.

avalanching · 19/06/2019 14:43

Lots of people holiday for 3 weeks, but usually straddling a half term or other holiday. Well of course they'd love it, that's the point isn't it?!

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Elisheva · 19/06/2019 14:44

There is plenty of creative writing they could do outside 4 brick walls, with no distractions from 29 other children.
Why do you send them to school at all if you’re so disdainful of what they do there?

Original poster

Goodtimesagain · 19/06/2019 14:45

October or December isn’t an option with my other halves work! We definitely shan’t be conceiving the baby while away, but would be nice to get to it once we are back. That’s exactly what I am trying to find out what the consequences would be.

OP posts:

CarolDanvers · 19/06/2019 14:47

I took my dd out for two weeks in September. I don't regret it as the holiday was bucket list holiday but I wouldn't do it again. She didn't struggle to catch up particularly, we kept up with homework and spellings while away but I think she felt left out on arrival back and little friendship factions had formed and it was hard for her to get back in. I'm very relaxed about term time holidays but three weeks is a long time. I wouldn't do it.

Talcott2007 · 19/06/2019 14:48

To me it isn't really a 'honeymoon' if you take your children - surely just a family holiday which could be done at any time? even before the wedding at the start of the summer holiday?? DH and I got married in 2017 we haven't had our 'honeymoon' yet as we didn't want to leave DD for an extended period of time at 2 years old or take her with us on something that is meant to be romantic or indulgent etc We have plans to do a honeymoon style holiday for something like our 5th anniversary but leave DD with grandparents.

Kingfisher5 · 19/06/2019 14:49

Our Head has told us we do not have to put together packs of work for children to do whilst away to catch up. It's incredibly time consuming. Do ask what they will be missing but please do not ask or expect any work to be given to you (if you go away that is). 3 weeks is far too long. September is a crucial month in schools - please do not take time out! It's a real pain for teachers when children have huge gaps. From the school's point of view that's a big dent in their attendance. Our latest Ofsted inspection picked up on our attendance; mostly parents taking their children for holidays (despite the fine) which is out of our hands. 3 weeks for 3 children could end up being a big fine?

Original poster

Goodtimesagain · 19/06/2019 14:52

Kingfisher5 thank you! Helpful comments are good!! I will be looking into early August breaks when I get home, if I am honest it hadn’t even occurred to me we could go before the wedding, it would have to be very early August though as we have family flying in from several countries as the wedding approaches and of course we want to spend time with them, as we see them so rarely!

OP posts:

FriarTuck · 19/06/2019 14:54

If you ask teachers to put some work together for them to do while away then they won't be so far behind when you come back
So the teachers not only have to do their regular job but also spend extra time putting some work together suitable for the children to do on holiday (which won't be on what they're missing as they haven't been taught it yet in class and therefore can't do it on their own) AND presumably mark it afterwards. PLUS then teach them what they missed.....
Can't think why more people aren't tempted to become teachers. Such a part-time role.....

Ihatemyseleffordoingthis · 19/06/2019 14:55

You will definitely be fined as it is more than 10 half day sessions. And because it is blatantly taking the piss. And you could potentially get up to 3 separate penalty notices (so £60 x 3 kids x 2 parents x 3 notices, so more than a £grand in fines)

And they could if being bloody minded about it and wanting to make an example, take the kids off the roll, or threaten to.

I personally think HTs should be allowed to sign off up to 2 weeks holiday in term time.

You've chosen a really disruptive time to take them out. If you had any conscience at all you'd tack it on to a school holiday and disrupt your DH-to-be's "timetable" instead but from your tone it's clear that its just when you fancy going. And I say that in terms of impact on the children, socially as well as educationally, not the consequences to you or the school.

And, seriously, give over on the "educational" nature of the trip.

ArnoldBee · 19/06/2019 14:56

You need to check your local authorities code of conduct. In my area you get taken to court after 6 missed sessions (3 days) do end up with a criminal record.

SleepingStandingUp · 19/06/2019 14:56

The same way adults do when they miss 15 days of work maybe it's entirely different. Either someone else does it, or you have some autonomy to get ahead / put deadlines off. You're children will be missing 15 days of learning. There will be stuff covered that the teacher will not be going over again.
They'll be in 3 weeks, then out 3 weeks then presumably back a week before half term? Could you at least push it back so one of the weeks is actual school holiday?

Agree it learning doesn't have to be in school, but are you actually going somewhere full of cultural visits, will you honestly be doing phonics and maths and alll the other stuff their peers will be getting through?

How about a Easter break? If you start ttc November an Easter break would be doable

MissBattleaxe · 19/06/2019 14:57

In year 7, that would be missing 75 lessons or half of an entire term. Lesson planning is complex and crucial and you can't opt in and out like this. Year 7 takes a lot of getting used , and there's no way I would have taken him out for this long.

No matter how "bright and well rounded" your children are, that's 75 lessons they will never catch up on.

Take a week, and do the rest another time, or straddle a half term and do two weeks then.

WeBuiltCisCityOnSexistRoles · 19/06/2019 14:58

You and your DH can be fined £60 per parent, per child.

Expensive.

I am lot less worried about attendance percentages than a lot of parents but even I think it's too long an absence at that age for the older DC.

WeBuiltCisCityOnSexistRoles · 19/06/2019 15:00

And the "well they will still learn outside school, it's like being absent from work" etc would you say this if your school had an issue and closed for three weeks leaving your DC missing all those lessons? I doubt it

and if you would, how do you feel about home educating? (Not being snarky, have done this myself and think it's great for some families).

SleepingStandingUp · 19/06/2019 15:02

Also don't fines work per parent? If the children's Dad is still around, how does he feel about it or are you offering to pay his too?

Original poster

Goodtimesagain · 19/06/2019 15:03

I love have you put ‘chosen’ and ‘fancy’ wow wow wow if you had read any of my comments you would see we have little choice in the timings we can go, although I will be looking more into August now! I don’t fancy taking my children out of school hence thinking about it, asking the consequences etc. The fact I am asking proves it’s something I am struggling with and only considering, however you chose to write comments as unthoughtful and unhelpful as you did. Shame on you!!!

OP posts:

ineedaholidaynow · 19/06/2019 15:04

I don't think a honeymoon will count as a once in a lifetime holiday for the children, as children don't usually go on honeymoons so don't need to go.

I think looking to go before the wedding is a good idea

Ihatemyseleffordoingthis · 19/06/2019 15:05

My secondary aged kids' schools (great schools) say it is the child's responsibility to catch up on what they have missed, and they are expected to do that for themselves. That means copying notes from other children's lessons, getting the homework set from mates and getting it done in a reasonable period. Is your Y8 up for that?

bigtoes · 19/06/2019 15:06

Please tell me you're at least planning on taking them somewhere educational where they can see ancient Mexican ruins or something and not Florida lol.

Honestly I wouldn't do it. It's insanely selfish. As a PP said, it's completely disrupting their routines although you wouldn't even consider disrupting your husbands.

I don't see why long haul means you have to do three weeks either. Two weeks, one over an existing school holiday would be understandable for sure.

Original poster

Goodtimesagain · 19/06/2019 15:06

Yer totally agree it’s not overly a honeymoon, more a more expensive holiday than usual with lots of treats, so want our children to enjoy these things too as we won’t be spending this much money on a holiday again!

OP posts:

Gazelda · 19/06/2019 15:07

I'm afraid that, to me, your posts come across as all about what you want.
An August wedding
Long haul honeymoon
Honeymoon after the wedding
TTC after the honeymoon

You haven't written much about the DC. It seems that Your 3 children are being expected to compromise their education for your honeymoon and baby planning. With no consultation with them.

rhowton · 19/06/2019 15:08

Absolutely do it!! Three weeks of school in the grand scheme of things is nothing!! Three weeks on a family holiday, long haul (so assuming somewhere different than Europe) having the time of their lives will be a memory they won't forget!! My parents took us out of school holidays to go to Australia for three weeks in January as it was thousands of pounds cheaper and it is still such an amazing memory!! Did it make a difference in my GCSEs absolutely not!! Do it and pay the fine!!

LadyMonicaBaddingham · 19/06/2019 15:09

Year 6 and Year 3 are REALLY important years in primary, a 3-week absence at the start of the academic year will, most likely, set those children back irredeemably (at least without some serious intervention). Add another child, in secondary school (!) to the mix and things get even more ridiculous. Please don't do this.

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