Most important parenting advice?

[Scoobyc]

The only advice my bro gave me was not to read any baby books - I did and then felt so guilty about what I was/was not doing with ds (eg Dr Sears saying you should make wedges out of foam for baby to roll over ), or what ds was/was not doing, that I stopped when he was about 6 months old!

Buuuut am I missing something really important!!! So I'm wondering what people consider to be their most important parenting advice? For people who don't read parenting books?! Or am I the only one?!

(Aimed at parents of babies/toddlers as ds is 13mo.)

I don't read parenting books either - but I would say happiness is the most important thing.

I don't read parenting books.

Ds is 2.8 and a happy child.

My mum brought me some but it turned out ds hadn't read them and so wasn't conforming to their ideas of what he should be doing .

If you have a problem ask on here. If not then you are obviously doing fine.

Most important piece of advice, and I can't remember who said this, is keep them warm, dry, fed, safe and loved and they more or less bring themselves up.

i dont read parenting books. i think the most important think to keep in mind is that you are raising another human being. this person should be able to function in an adult world.

so things like saying "no" and not always getting your own way are a part of that. sometimes saying "tough luck mate" not pandering or pampering on a long term basis.

in short to raise a person who will be able to function as an adult is your most important job as a parent.

be relaxed do what feels right to you

i think it's important to remember how your childhood felt, and see things from a little person's pov sometimes.

I was thinking about this last night, when i was tired as hell and DS wasn't too well. I remembered how it felt to be held and safe by my mother when i was snuffly and sad, and i hugged the bugger even tighter.

You make the memories.
remember this

this is very important.

when you spend time with your kids or take them somewhere or dance in the living room with a hairbrush or put make -up on them and let them dress in your clothes - your making memories.

Excellent, there's nothing here to feel guilty about!

PG - I do this. I HATED being a child and always try to see things from ds' perspective (a bit hard when he's so young admittedly!).

I believe even as a baby you should believe them to be almost like an equal and treat their needs as such.

For example you don't want to be wet, hungry, bored, hot, cold, lonely, trapped in a pushchair all day, tired etc etc and neither does you child.

Remembering this made everything a bit easier for me.

lots and lots of love, huggs, kisses and play with them

"This too shall pass"

...for bad things - therefore remember it will end eventually e.g. teething, bad sleep, tantrums

...for good things - treasure the moment because it's all too fleeting

And I see parenting as building blocks. Especially at this age when they are too young for memory formation but they're not too young to feel safe, loved and to trust in you so when they are old enough to build memories the foundations will be there already.

Agree with gothicmama. You can read all the books in the world but they can't compare to your instinct. Try to trust yourself a bit. I know that's not always easy but happy mumma usually means a happy bubba

With toddlers - to keep the mood light and make as many everyday things fun and games as possible.