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Parenting

For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

Overweight 4 year old - looking for tips

78 replies

toomanylols · 22/04/2019 22:20

Hello everyone,

I need help. I have an overweight 4 year old. I have been big my whole life and was bullied when I was younger and I fear she is going to go through the same thing. Genetically she will put on weight a lot quicker than her cousins who can eat the fridge itself and still be skinny as a rake.

She's starting school next September 2020 and I really want her to have a lower BMI by then. She's wearing 6-7 clothes now and she's just 4. My mum lives next door and is terrible for giving sweets and treats so I will have to get her on board.

Can anyone please offer me tips or advice or share a healthy sample meal plan in a day of the life of their preschoolers?

I try offer her healthy food but I've noticed there isn't much structure to our day, she usually gets whatever she wants I.e. wraps, yoghurt, rice cakes, she eats a lot of them. And when dinner comes around she's never really starving. She eats loads of jellies, loves chocolate, the treats usually come from my mam, my sister's. But being honest she probably has treats everyday.

Any advise would be greatly appreciated. Thank you xx

OP posts:
ApplestheHare · 22/04/2019 22:30

My DD is 4 and would 100% eat like yours if given the choice Grin How active is your DD?

DD is constantly running around but we try and keep treats to once or twice a week and stick to main meals and aim for healthy snacks in between. So a typical day might be:

Breakfast of toast or porridge
Lunch of whatever nursery gives her, often pasta
Afternoon snack of fruit/yoghurt/cheese string/tomatoes/nuts/cucumber sticks
Tea of whatever DH and I are having, e.g. salmon and rice with salad, sausages and mash, veggie curry, spag bol, etc.

We are a bit mean and tell her snacks and treats will be banned if she doesn't eat the things that will make her strong and healthy.

user1496701154 · 22/04/2019 22:43

So how active is little one, take to softplays , dance around with her I do with my son. We have treat days with my little one. Limit chocolate and sweets but make have snacks such as fruits, raw vegetables, pin yougurt with a tiny bit of honey ocassionly.

This is my son's diet

Breakfast 6am either cereal, with a piece of fruit, toast with butter, peanut butter and on treat days jam/marmalde
Get ready take out of house for playgroup or to park for a run about until do bee time take snack outs.
Snack 10am fruit. /Doreen loaf

12 dinner time _ soup, sandwich I'd meat always has cucmber, tomato's, lettuces,carrot in it. Wrap. Beans on toast
Go to another playgroup, park, play in room
Afternoon snack- plain yougurts with fruit. Doreen loaf. Homemade fruit muffin. Just fruity. Vegetables sticks.

Tea- whatever we are having. Sausge and veg, sausge and mash, stir fry, boloasange, fish fingers and chips

We offer water and milk all day.

Bed time

Website such as mylovely little lunchbox , my fussy little eater and my kids lick the Bo are great for meal ideas and healthy snacks. Also get your lo invoclwd I. Making their own snacks is great only of you want to thought

MustardScreams · 22/04/2019 22:51

No snacks at all. She doesn’t need them.

Concentrate on healthy, filling meals. High protein and no crappy white carbs.

Portion sizes, they’re a lot smaller for a 4 year old than you probably think. Look at the infant and toddler forum which has excellent portion guides.

www.infantandtoddlerforum.org/

Exercise every day - even if it’s just going for a walk around the block. Take her swimming/to the park/to kick a ball about etc. Bike riding. But be active everyday.

It’s really important you get on top of this for her otherwise you’re opening her up to a lifetime of eating badly and suffering with it.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

toomanylols · 22/04/2019 23:17

Thank you so much everybody. I know it is really time I get on top of this and I am determined. Thanks for the tips and advice. I love the sample meal plans x

OP posts:
LiliesAndChocolate · 23/04/2019 08:53

@toomanylols It will be a bit hard because she has gained bad habits and certainly a taste for certain food, but if you are consistent and determined, you will succeed .
It is not only the food on the plate but the whole eating routine that you should address, for both of you. Kids learn by example, so you should eat together, sitting down at a table with plate and cutlery.

Clean your cupboard and get rid of all the junk and processed food, starting with jelly. Jelly is the most infamous invention and nobody should eat it. It is a dead animal carcass that is boiled until tendon, skin, bones, cartilage and other inedible body parts are melted into a gelatinous mass. It is utterly disgusting.

Even "healthy" food that is highly processed and transformed should be ditched. Cook real food, that is fresh and colourful.

Breakfast" oats or a wholemeal toast or better sourdough bread

Lunch: a small steak with green beans, a sole with some boiled potatoes, a chicken breast with sauté broccolini, meatballs in tomato sauce with brown rice, two hard eggs with some spinach, swordfish or mussels if she likes them with a lettuce, a meatloaf with roasted pumpkin, ....

Dinner : pasta, risotto, soup, lentil stew, a curry, a dahl, and some vegetables, grated carrots, tomato salad with onion, hummus and celery, .....

She can have fruits for snacks.

Have a frank discussion with your family and tell them you don't want her to go through the same ordeal as you and that you want to start changing the family eating habits and that they shouldn't sabotage your plan.
Sweets and other birthday treats are just for birthday, and artificial food such as crisps, rice cakes.

Of course, from time to time, she can have chocolate or a piece of cake, but real one, quality ones.

SimonJT · 23/04/2019 09:04

Keep a record of everything she eats for a week, you might surprise yourself.

This is what my almost four year old had yesterday, then what he is having today

Monday
Breakfast mashed banana pancakes

Snack cucumber and carrot sticks

Lunch omlette with onion, mushroom, peas and peppers.

Snack soya yoghurt

Dinner half a small jacket potato with veggie chilli and salad

Today
Breakfast weetabix with oat milk

Snack soya yoghurt and grapes

Lunch left over veggie chilli in a wrap

Snack bag of crisps

Dinner curry with egg, cauliflower, potatoes and chic peas, with a naan, no rice.

EggysMom · 23/04/2019 09:14

Your size (and genes) have nothing to do with your child's size, but your judgement is probably creating a false impression of how much your child should be eating. I was a pudgy child and am now an obese adult; DH was 'normal' but is now overweight; our son is skinny through very active play, something I never really did as a child, and sensible portions.

BackInTime · 23/04/2019 09:23

How much exercise does she get? Try to be as active as possible in your daily life. Things like walking to preschool and back and perhaps school next year? Walk to shops, parks etc. Does she ride a bike or scooter? Is there any activities that she could join like swimming, gym or dance for example.

toomanylols · 23/04/2019 10:47

Thank you everyone so much. She's having her porridge now. I am really inspired to turn this around.

OP posts:
MustardScreams · 23/04/2019 11:37

That’s such a good attitude to have! And you’ve realised early enough that you can really help her make changes. Positive morning!

Teddybear45 · 23/04/2019 11:42

Is she running around? Being active? That’s the best way to start. Not by restricting her diet which will just cause weight issues later.

You need to get her out and about doing fun stuff. Enrol her into sports classes afterschool. Get her into brownies / Guides and then do the walks / hikes with her. Get her walking / hiking at a brisk pace for 60 mins everyday. That means changing your attitude as a family.

midsummabreak · 23/04/2019 11:55

Make running fun by going to the closest oval near you and racing with her. Run around the centre of the oval in a small circle, not around the edge which would take too long. Just pretend you really want to beat her and make it a fun race , pretending to be surprised when she wins , say " hey! You cant be faster than your mum, let's try this again! " Or Challenge her that thereis no way she can run more than once around They love beating their parents and will feel great afterwards and with more exercise, through walks or fun small races or bike rides, they should sleep better at nught.

NerrSnerr · 23/04/2019 17:12

I agree with the activities. My 4 year old loves swimming and we go as often as we can (as well as a swimming lesson). We also go to the park and generally just out. I find rock painting/ hiding/ finding a good way to get her out on walks (I sometimes keep a few in my pocket to 'find' if we can't find any).

My daughter is a vegetable avoider. She has to have at least one kind of veggie with her lunch and tea but I let her choose which (we have most kinds in the freezer).

Usuallyinthemiddle · 23/04/2019 17:17

Stick at it. It's tough to say no at first but remember why you're doing it.
A small steak or sole for a 4 year old lunch?? Hmm . I'm not sure you need to go that far!

Sleephead1 · 23/04/2019 17:31

my son is a little older buts eaten similar since your little ones ag His diet isnt perfect but he likes lots of things and hes very active. Breakfast he always has fruit usually half a large apple , a banana and then slice of brown toast / sometimes I make fruit pancakes or he has a croissant. He might have a cup of milk aswell as water. If he's at school he has milk and if he likes the fruit he has that. For school lunch he take a pack lunch but doesn't eat loads as wants to play so has a cheese sandwich/ cheese and crackers , pitta ect carrot or spinach usually maybe blueberries or grapes then either a yoghurt or something like a mini gingerbread man or if we have backed a tiny piece of cake. If he's at home he has rice cakes / cheese nd crackers for snack and then similar lunch but sometomes egg based omlette/ scrambled ect or beans on toast. For tea he has a mix pasta / meat and veg/ fish pie/ stir fry ECT he then always has a Apple and milk for super. He likes scooting/riding his bike / dancing / climbing and jumping. He's small for his age that's just his build. I would try to offer healthy choices and get outside as much as you can go to the park, swimming , for walks, climb trees ECT

Grumpbum123 · 23/04/2019 17:36

Well done for wanting to protect her from bullies.
My 4yr old has eaten

Breakfast 1 cracker, grapes and a banana
Lunch- 1 sausage, beans, 4 chips (at pub)
Ice cream x1 scoop orderedbut not eaten as bouncing on a castle.
Dinner tonight- beans on toast with one slice of bread and an apple and yoghurt.
We don’t do snacks as he wouldn’t eat a meal.
Bedtime he will have a cup of milk- I’ve osteoporosis and unwilling to stop this at the moment.

I would definitely be talking to your mum and sister too

HoumiLoomi · 23/04/2019 17:43

My children’s diet (5 & 2) today:

Breakfast: cornflakes and banana

Lunch: Egg salad sandwich, fruit, few crisps.

Tea: chicken breast, sweet potato wedges, corn on the cob. For pudding they had natural yogurt and honey.
No other snacks because they don’t really eat them.

DerbyRacer · 23/04/2019 17:58

My ds lost weight and kept it off with portion control (I weighed all his food to check I was not giving him too much) and with swimming lessons and lots of physical activity.

lorisparkle · 23/04/2019 18:34

I find with my ds (and with me and dh!) if there are no 'treats' in the house then we can't eat them. At the moment it is s nightmare as there is so much chocolate around. My ds will eat smaller portions of the healthy food so they have room for the chocolate, and will ask for chocolate all day! Usually I avoid buying crisps, chocolates, biscuits, sweets so the temptation (and nagging) is not there.

I would try and get your family on board, stock up on fruit and vegetables and try and get into the habit of three fairly healthy meals and lots of exercise.

LiliesAndChocolate · 23/04/2019 20:21

@Usuallyinthemiddle what is wrong with a small steak or a sole?

In France, children eat whatever the adults are eating, and I really mean whatever. Go into any restaurant and you will see very young children (2 years old) eating snails, crabs. In Italy, children will eat saltimbocca and artichokes like there is no tomorrow.

I would say a steak and a sole is something extremely basic for a 4 year old. Put a square of butter in a pan, put the sole or the steak, add salt and pepper, 7 minutes at medium heat and done. How is that going too far. It is the easiest, laziest lunch.

What is wrong with steak or sole?

SoyDora · 23/04/2019 20:26

What is wrong with steak or sole?

There’s nothing wrong with them at all, but a lot of 4 year olds will eat their lunch at school or nursery so probably fairly hard to provide. Also expensive.
My 3 year old loves steak and fish but it would be expensive to provide it so often.

LiliesAndChocolate · 23/04/2019 20:29

That's why it was listed as one of the lunches of the week. Not a daily meal. And you can swap lunch with dinner anytime.

Usuallyinthemiddle · 23/04/2019 20:29

It's not typical lunch food for adults in most UK households. (Or in packed lunches.) It would cost a fortune! Sadly, I think most people would think you were bonkers if you said you'd fed your 4 year old steak or sole for lunch. But it does sound lovely, all the same!

SoyDora · 23/04/2019 20:32

We can’t really swap lunch with dinner on weekdays very easily for our 3 year old as she’s at pre school, and has a packed lunch. Lunch has to be something that keeps well in a lunchbox and can be eaten quickly (they only get around 20 mins to eat).

Bringbackthestripes · 23/04/2019 20:35

she eats a lot of them. And when dinner comes around she's never really starving. you need to keep an eye on portion sizes and try to keep her busy and active rather than constantly feeding her.

www.nutrition.org.uk/attachments/article/734/BNF%20Toddler%20Eatwell%20Leaflet_OL.pdf

www.healthychildren.org/English/ages-stages/preschool/nutrition-fitness/Pages/Feeding-and-Nutrition-Your-4-to-5-Year-Old.aspx

www.nhs.uk/change4life/

I hope your mum gets in board and doesn’t sabotage your efforts with the treats. Good luck.

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