Telling off your child when you only see them twice a week

[user1494083116]

My boyfriend and his ex split up 10 years ago. He has his daughter twice a week but will not tell her off. She lies compulsively swears at her mum and step dad won’t listen to me her step mum. But my boyfriend won’t deal with it. His ex has tried but nothing seems to work. He still spoils her rotten his folks too it’s causing arguments between her mum and husband me and her dad and even her grand parents she’s nearly 12 I dread what she will be like at 16 if this isn’t sorted now. Advice pls

My ex was Disney df. At 12+14 my dc went nc with him.
They decided actually they wanted parenting...
Their words.
Your dp is an arse.
And a terrible df.
Not much of a dp either expecting you to live like that.

I do understand that it’s hard; we only see DSD every other weekend so DH doesn't want to spend the whole weekend telling her off and wants to enjoy her time with us but there has to be boundaries. We might let some things go but being rude to us isn’t on and she can’t just do what she wants.
Children need boundaries and it won’t help just to spoil her all the time but I’m not sure how to help your DP see that.

Trouble is my boyfriends attitude is if she plays up her mums husband he finds it funny. She told her mum to shove it the other day but as my bloke doesn’t get on so we’ll with his ex he doesn’t deal with it. It’s driving me mad. Trouble is being a step parent I can only do so much but if she were mine she wouldn’t get away with half she does let alone talk trash at us or any one else