My daughter is 4 (only just) and is still in pull ups day and night.
She can hold it in because when I suggest she takes pull-ups off and tries wearing knickers, she's happy to but as soon as she actually needs to go, she gets upset and asks for pull-ups.
She is terrified of using the potty or toilet. She gets absolutely hysterical when I suggest she sits on either. A few months ago we actually managed to get her to have 3 wee's on the toilet and I thought we'd cracked it but after 3, she went back to being hysterical.
She stays with her dad one night a week and because of previous DV, we have no direct contact and everything is done through my mum. So while I haven't spoken directly to him about it, I do know she is the same at his house.
I'm at a loss. People keep telling me she'll do it when she's ready but it seems to be a complete psychological thing with her. She is capable of holding it and knows when she needs to go. I cannot work out what is upsetting her so much. She says it's the flush noise but she's been in the bathroom when me or her siblings have flushed the toilet and it hasn't bothered her at all. I've tried a special seat, I've tried pink glitter in the toilet, I've tried reading her a book on the toilet, I've tried songs, dances, you name it.
What should I do?