which generally " accepted" parenting protocols do you not go along wiht

[codJane]

here

cleanign babies teeth - never really bothered

Bib-wearing never took off in our household. Never found a type that couldn't be removed. And even if they stayed on, food materialised underneath anyway.

Do give him back food that he's dropped.

Do let him eat mud / grass / newspaper / whatever really

Did teach him go go to sleep on his own, as I didn't want to spend half my life rocking/feeding/holding hand/pacing up an down with ds on shoulder, waiting for him to go to sleep, only for him to wake the second I put him down, and have to start all over again.

Didn't bring him into my bed - want to share my bed with DH, not wiggly, noisy son.

Moved him out of our room at 3 months, as his singing at 5 am really pissed me off!!

Did stop breast feeding a 4 months 'cos I was fed up with leaky boobs hideous droopy bras, wearing cardigans all the time, and no sex drive.

So there.

No excessive bathing hairwashing etc No naughty step

mollycoddle, i was always bemused by people who left their dc's in bibs all day, never did that with dd.........then i had ds, a lovely dribbly sicky baby.....now i know why!

Scotslass - i sit in the back of the car with ds so i can pop his dummy in if he gets whingey!

i stopped sterilising when he started to put everything in his mouth. have never sterilised his dummy (he only had it from 4.5 months ish). have never made special baby food. he has what i'm having or nothing. do bathe every night but only as part of a bedtime routine. am a bit fussy about sunhats, but he's got a bald little head and i can't bear the thought of it getting sunburnt! (pfb anyone?!)

have also held him at arm's length and gone what the FUCK do you WANT??? (after 2 hours solid whingeing!)

oh, stopped checking temperature of bath water after he screamed the house down when we put him in water that was exactly 37 degrees, or whatever it's supposed to be. dh ran him a bath that he thought would be ok and he's been fine ever since!

i never properly checked bath temp, never acctually used elbow either, or put cold in first. never checked milk temp on wrist either!

can i just add - put hot water into bath while he was still in it! just did that tonight! am becoming more relaxed as he gets older. it's great!

Am totally permissive about what ds (2) can touch. So he can touch dh's beloved guitar, the stereo the TV, my lovely new laptop etc. as long as he is sensible. If he starts doing something stupid he has to stop.

He always has been allowed to and as a consequence IS very sensible and barely bothers with these things now as they aren't forbidden fruit (except he does go over to the CD player and choose which of two or three CDs he wants and put music on).

I allow him to put music on if he wants provided I am not doing something it will get in the way of.

Baths every night but hairwash sometimes only every 2 weeks!!

Clothes only changed when dirty - sometimes wears the same Tshirt 3 or 4 days running.

And erm the pair of socks he had on today I think he has been wearing every day for about 2 weeks. But they don't smell so what's the problem?

I've just realised I haven't bothered measuring my kids. I haven't a clue what height they are and I don't have marks on the door frame. Come to think of it I didn't worry about weighing them as babies as they were so huge to begin with.

iv never measured their height, do people do that?

ds 2.7
No daily baths (I really like the way my ds smells when he's a bit grubby, is that wrong?)
use soap on him about once a fortnight
(do wash his hands face personal areas daily though)
brushing teeth= him trying, not me scrubbing
No child locks on doors
only had bottle from about 1 yr
gave up sterilising at 4 1/2 months
No set sleep routine- but made sure I was tuned in to his cues so knew when he was tired and helped him sleep when he was (eg red eyes= sleep time) basically if he's tired he sleeps, same now.

but...still has dummy, bottle at bed time and is still in a cot.

i try not to smoke in the flat. except when its rainin

Never sterilised
Moved both into their own room at 5 weeks
Never bothered with a baby monitor
Moved DD from her car seat plus chassis into a normal buggy (that didn't even recline) at 8.5 months. Did same with DS
Clothes only washed when dirty
Fed both exactly what we were having but pureed up from age of 4 months, inc beef bourginon for DD which had booze in it

They don't seem to show any ill effects from any of the above and both have entirely different personalities

dd 3.8 still has bottle of milk to go to sleep

Hair brushing

Have been following this thread with amazement.

Its like a boasting session 'whos the worse ?'

But the worse by far is admitting to smoking in front of kids.Dont you know passive smoking kills and does more harm to those breathing it it than the smoker!!

Im not perfect (far from it) is anyone? But really, some of th ecomments

...walking over to the firing line....

I did most of the "parental protocols" so I can't say anything here. Apart from sitting in the back with my baby - that would have been tricky since I was the one driving the car at the time and I put her (rear-facing) seat in the front passenger seat until she was old enough to go into the booster. Neither did I go to baby massage/signing - I was too busy going to uni to complete my degree.

Ditched baby monitor with dd, as it stressed me out the first time round. Left ds and dd in bath together (just in next room) ds pushed dd (20mo) over, luckily she resurfaced, but bit more cautious now. Only ever bathed them every other day mostly.Have 3 stairgates, (despite bungalow) fantastic !
Don't hoover every day, kids do pick food up off floor. Snotty noses - inevitable

chocolate peanut, this wasnt about who is the worst, just a fwe htings maybe we did first time round, baby monitors, baths every night, clean clothes every day etc. that arent going to hurt them and acctually some people have come to realise they dont make you a bad parent.

although i do have to say the smoking comment made me a bit

I have 3 DC's.

Baths are only once a week at the most - life is too short, plus DD2 sounds as if she is to be murdered if you try to wash her hair.

Baby monitors - a godsend if you want to go for a night out to you next door neighbours (semi-detached) and still hear the darlings as you crack open the third bottle of wine. Same applies for the end of the garden.

Stair gates/ Cupboard locks etc - survival of the fittest and natural selection prevails in our house. If you poison yourself/fall down the stairs etc, well too bad, next baby please.

Mother and baby groups - one phrase - parent council members in the making - not recommended.

Clothes - if it looks okay, it must be okay, even if its 3 days old. Also, it is acceptable for both daughters to wear full pirates of the carribean regalia with wellies to car showrooms when choosing a new car even if the staff look a little alarmed.

Sleeping on the back - DD1 got a terrible flat head and I swore never to do it again, corrected it be sleeping her on her side as I saw every parent in Helsinki doing on a visit there and alternated it every night until it was normal again at 6 months. All subsequent children sleep on their sides or backs. They sleep better that way anyway.

Sterlising - I still like to do this with DS1 - 4months, but I don't know why? Even if the dog licks his face and he likes to lick the dogs bowl??? Social conditioning, I can't help it, but a waste of time probably.

Routines ala GF are horrible toxic things and do not take any of a childs emotional and social development into account. Have seen babies who've been on a v well known routine and they are like lttle automatons. Dont' do them!! Abandoned the idea at 3 weeks.

Dd has bath everynight because she loves it more than for dirt reasons althoug she is a little grub.

Gave up breasfeeding at 4.5 months cos hated feeling restricted, crap bras and just didn't enjoy it, strike me down in flames!

NCT classes brainwashing by sanctimonious busy bodies, never again!

Ditto mother and baby groups, sat there thinking if I didn't have a baby I would avid you like the plague, didn't fit in to the local yummy mummy set so Me and dd went and did fun things with proper friends and family. So much for the myth that you meet "life long friends" more like life long avoiding them.

Uni friend heavily into routines and "taking and active part in the local NCT" me heavily into organised chaos and going to gigs and the pub.

Weaned at 4.5 months loves food.

Stopped sterilising at 4 months, the instant you take them out of the steriliser THEY STOP BEING STERILE, IT'S POINTLESS!!!

I drink wine before expressing and have breastfed whilst drunk
I let my DS1 (2.3) eat food he has dropped on the floor
I am very slack at washing his hands before he eats
I let him walk up and down the stairs on his own

call me old fashioned but i'm still breastfeeding and plan to do so till dd is 18 months, i dont like being looked at like i'm disgusting just because i'm young and doing what is natural, i thoroughly believe in stair gates and baby proofing the really dangerous area's such as drawers with knives in and electic sockets, dd is bathed everynight because she enjoys it, her clothers are changed everyday, i wouldn't wear dirty clothes so why should she?
i take her to baby swimming because she enjoys it and i still steralise everything and will do till she's a year old
we have a routine and it works for us so we're happy about it, she's in be by 8 and we get the evening to ourselves, some structure is good!

however...
i believe in baby wearing, also, if all my instincts tell me that if she cries i should comfort her then i will, no matter what hv says i.e no controled crying
weaned at 4 months because she was ready for it
she slept in my bed till recently, i'm a light sleeper anyway so she never got hurt, if she's having a bad night she still comes in with us
i basically have some things i stick by but the rest is up to her, we go to mostly the same places because she recognises people and i like it that way

We have a structure more than a routine which is flexible as to whther she's having a growth spurt, got a cold etc. However didn't get it from a book, just came from common sense and learning to read her cues. Goes to bed the same time every night cos that's when she's tired.What I find hard to accept is these rigid regimes dicatated by some so called guru. There's a middle grouod between that and total anarchy and that's the route we take which allows plenty of room for flexibility and recognising your baby as an individual.

Think breastfeeding is brilliant and something that should be encouraged but not coerced. It just didn't work for me long term but it was ok at first. The breastfeeding masia can be very demoralising for a lot of women and the routine "experts" can cause some of us to have huge feelings of inadequacy. it's important to realise there's no one approach that fits everyone.

Sterilising why the magical 1 year cut off?? Don't get it.