Okay, so my MIL declared yesterday that she won't be "doing Christmas" this year. At first I accepted this, (I mean, it's not about the presents anyway), but then she made it clear that she won't be willing to participate in ANYTHING over the Christmas period at all. She's not even willing to come over for a mince pie and a glass of mulled wine. Nothing. Zilch. No visits. No party games. No cuddles with her grandson. No trips out for my son to see Santa. No Christmas meal for her and her OH (cooked by me). Nothing.
Now, her mother passed away in September, and I really feel for her. I've tried so so hard to keep her occupied and to try and lift her spirits over the last few months. I mean, I've gone out of my way to do so. But I'm struggling to understand this one.
It'll be her grandson's first christmas, and I really thought that he'd be enough for her to at least try and falsify some joy. My own mum lost her father a few months back, and her mother's dementia has worsened so much over the last couple of months that she doesn't recognise family anymore. Yet my mum is still bothering. In fact, she's throwing herself into my DS's first Christmas, because it's something positive..
I haven't said anything to my OH, as it would cause arguments, and it's not my place to talk to her directly, but I feel hurt over this. My OH and our son don't deserve to just be frozen out.
What also really twists the knife is the fact that she's going to spend Christmas with her OH's family, and she was recently tagged on Facebook at a Christmas event with his grandchildren. (It was a selfie with a reindeer. She was all smiles).
What is this? Is my hurt unjustified? Am I being unreasonable? What more can I do?