Horseriding with a screaming 9months old

[Pumkins]

Hi there -
Title says it all. I have a very active, busy 9months old DD. She is happy to be independent in the house, at clubs, goes to nursery no probs, will explore her surroundings and so on. She spends lots of time with dad and family as well as quality time with me when I am off (working flexi hours).
She goes in the pram as well as the sling (soft back and woven wrap) and loves the yard, animals the horses etc...
I can lunge and do loose work with my horse no probs she goes in the sling and loves it but I can't get 20min to ride. Literally. I cannot have her in the pram she goes mad, so I set up a little travel cot with toys and comforters on the side of the arena. Ideal, I can see her, she can play, she has slept, eaten and is clean, she is happy and giggling about.
Then I put her in the cot - cue screaming... non stop. She wants picking up and she will scream the place down until I stop my ride and give in.
I tried leaving her -non stop crying for 35 min that was rough.
I tried moving the cot IN the arena. Great training for the horse but still no better.
Tried regular comforting (5min ride, quick cuddle, 5 min, quick cuddle)... she just wants holding.
Any idea what I can do? I have no help available and not riding is not an option for me. Especially on a beautiful, windless crisp sunny day!

Why can't you ride with the baby on your back? I did that with DS pretty much from birth onwards

gosh, what a bracing thread

OP: AIBU
MN: Yes, yes you are.
OP: You are all mean and I hate you.

OP, how old are you? Because you sound about 12-and-a-half.

I understand that people are concerned. I agree to some extend even (hence asking for suggestions).
However I will not tolerate mum bashing as it occured on this thread. Mindless name calling has no benefit to anyone.

A horse troll...surely that's an MN first?

But since 90% of people here think a baby can't have a shred of independence and hence all adult life ceases to exist

erm, babies are not independent, and shouldnt have to be

Pumkins Mon 22-Oct-18 16:30:59
Many thanks to those who have suggested alternative options to me. Including childcare -I simply wasn't aware of some options out there and I am glad to know. I will look into it for the future as I am aware this isn't a sustainable arrangement.

you werent aware of childcare?

I was of course. Didn't think of mum sharing or local colleges though.
Tbh didnt think this would break the internet. Shows how little time I usually spend on it.
Anyway I have so good alternatives to look at now so thanks to those concerned.
I better step off. Fuelling this debate is no good to anyone.

However I will not tolerate mum bashing as it occured on this thread.

Pointing out obvious stupidity isn’t “Mum bashing”.

This isn’t a SAHM v. Working Mothers or BF v. FF thread where legitimate parenting choices get picked apart by people with opposing views. People are accurately pointing out that what you’ve been doing is mindbendingly foolish.

I hope the owners of your yard have bomb proof liability insurance.

Some good alternative *

Sorry, you lost me when you said you left your baby screaming for 35minutes. FFS.

The asking colleges or mum sharing has been good. But you don’t need to ride and abandon your baby. She can go with her childcare/babies father etc.

When she’s a toddler she’s going to be even more unhappy to sit abandoned in a travel cot seeing you give attention to a horse whilst she screams feeling abandoned

That's the thing - it happened once out of desperation. If I was fine with it I wouldnt be here looking for solutions. Obviously I don't want to leave her crying for attention - so I asked here for ideas.
I got some.
I will look into it.
Thanks.

Mindless name calling? You just called us knobs on the previous page

I hope you get banned from MN.

115 posts is not breaking the internet

However I will not tolerate mum bashing as it occured on this thread.

Sorry I missed the memo that we are supposed yo all agree with you even though what you are doing is dangerous.

Mindless name calling has no benefit to anyone.

Oh the irony.

OP, Have you read through your own posts to see for yourself how mind blowingly rude you are? You post on a public forum and then have a hissy fit when posters show genuine concern for your baby. You easily win the prize for the day's most entitled poster.

Ride with someone else looking after but you can do a simple, 'walk' ride holding her. Good for her to get used to horses.

I'm surprised your yard owner hasn't had words with you about carrying a baby in a sling while working with a horse or leaving him/her in a cot either inside or outside of the arena. Your actions were reckless with absolutely no thought to the safety of your child. I've had horses for 30 odd years and hired a babysitter to allow me to ride when my DC were small if DH wasn't around. You sound selfish and self absorbed OP!

Waving to the daily mail

🤔

It doesn’t really matter if you “tolerate” it or not to be honest - you need to step up and put your child first. I’d rather say that bluntly in the hope that it might get through to you. I don’t know you, I don’t care what you do, but I do care that there is potential for a child to be injured by such irresponsible decisions from their caregiver - and that is something we should all call out when we see it.

@pumkins.. is the yard owner onsite? Would they watch DD in exchange for something i.e money, mucking out etc. Or do any of the other horse owners have teenagers who would

Poor child, you need to get a nanny if you refuse to look after her and your horse is more important

Be willing to help

Are you sure you are OK OP?